


ready for the fall

by callistawolf



Series: The Fall 'Verse [1]
Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, F/M, Flommy friendship, Laurel Lance is Dead, OFBB 2016, Olicity Fic Bang 2016, Romance, Season 2 Rewrite, Smut, Tommy Merlyn is Alive, delicity friendship, thelicity friendship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-29
Updated: 2016-09-26
Packaged: 2018-08-11 20:37:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 83,071
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7906879
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/callistawolf/pseuds/callistawolf
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Taking place directly after the events in “Sacrifice” (the season 1 finale), Felicity tries to pull Oliver back from the edge. But is Oliver ready to be pulled back? Or is he ready for the fall?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Undertaking has just rattled Starling City and Felicity deals with the immediate aftermath in the basement underneath Verdant. Almost right away, her concerns go directly towards Oliver. Where is he? Is he okay?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it is, at last! This is my [Olicity Fic Bang 2016](http://olicityficbang.tumblr.com/) story! I'm so excited to share this with you all. I wrote this over the course of a month, mid-June to mid-July. I love when a story just FLOWS out of my fingers like that and this one did that. I follow canon pretty well but there's some fairly major changes and this fic mostly address HOW those changes would affect the canon that we saw on our screens. What stays the same? What is different? Is it worse? Better? 
> 
> I had a lot of fun with this one and I hope you guys do too! Check me out on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/callistawolf), say hello, ask questions about the story and I might post some teases and fun stuff regarding the story. I'll use the tag #readyforthefall
> 
> Art by the lovely and incomparable [fistis](http://fistis.tumblr.com/) and tireless beta work by the amazing [the-silverforked-sky](https://the-silverforked-sky.tumblr.com/)
> 
> Title comes from [Imagine Dragon's "The Fall"](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iEfPffexVLo). Give it a listen. Not only does it encapsulate this story pretty perfectly, but it's just a beautiful song period.

The ceiling above her creaked ominously after the shaking finally stopped. Felicity peered around the foundry basement, trying to take stock.  Tears were still leaking down her cheeks; she hadn’t even known she was crying. The comm in her ear was silent. The last thing she’d heard from Dig and Oliver was them checking that she was okay. Then Dig said he was headed to the nearest urgent care to get himself patched up and Oliver was going over to check on Laurel at CNRI.

That was ten minutes ago. 

She got up out of her chair, her legs shaking as though the earth was still moving. Some of the shelves had toppled over but everything looked more or less intact. 

“Well, that’s a relief,” she muttered, dusting off the skirt of her dress.

Of course, she spoke too soon. The floor beneath her feet jolted as an aftershock rolled through. With a yelp, Felicity dove underneath her desk, covering the back of her head and neck with her arms as she huddled. The ceiling did more than just creak this time. A deafening crack echoed through the lair and she heard chunks of concrete fall around her, some landing on the desk, making it shake and groan.

Then, the entire basement was plunged into darkness as the power failed. The generator didn’t even kick on. Afraid that something would fall and crush the desk, Felicity crawled quickly out and hurried towards where she knew the stairs that lead up to the club were. 

She was nearly at the stairs when there was a loud groaning and cracking noise. The shaking had stopped but something was falling over. Before she had a chance to question what or how to get out of the way, she was thrown to the ground. 

A shelving unit had crashed on top of her, pinning her lower half. Thankfully, there wasn’t much on it so it wasn’t as heavy as it could have been but it was enough to hold her to the floor and no doubt leave her with some nasty bruises. 

It was dark and she was scared. Some more dust rained down on her and she shook her head to try to clear it from her face. She was stuck and her phone was clear over on the desk so she couldn’t even call for help. Felicity was utterly helpless and she _hated_ feeling that way. Sleeping on a cold, dirty basement floor, covered in dust and without food and water wasn’t her idea of a great way to spend the night. _At least I’m alive_ , she told herself.

It felt like ages passed before she heard some creaking over her head unassociated with the crumbling ceiling. There was a bang and a crash. Someone was up there! Hope leapt in her chest. Maybe there’d be no sleeping on the floor after all!

There was another crash, followed by some muffled cursing. Felicity took in a deep breath, as deep as she dared, and let loose in her loudest loud voice. “Help! Anyone! I’m in the basement!”

Then, she remembered the locks. Because of their strict attention to security, Felicity had it set up that even if there was a power failure, the door would still be locked. It had seemed like a great idea at the time. Less so now. 

Sure enough, a moment later she heard the door at the top of the stairs rattle. A muffled voice; “Hello? Is someone down there?” 

It was Tommy Merlyn. Thank _god_ , because explaining the setup down here to someone else could have gotten… interesting. 

“Tommy! Its Felicity!I’m stuck!Can you get the door open?” she shouted. She sucked in a lungful of dust and coughed, feeling a little bit of weakness overtake her for a moment. She tried to calm her breathing. 

“Felicity?? Sure! Hold on just a sec!”

It’s not like she could go anywhere. So this was what it was like to be a captive audience.She waited what felt like ages, trying her hardest not to panic, before she heard Tommy at the door again. 

“Felicity? I’ve got some tools here and chunk of steel to use as a battering ram. I’ll get to you as soon as I can!”

She didn’t reply, not wanting to have another coughing fit.She could feel tear tracks drying on her face and knew she must be a dusty mess. _But she was alive_. 

Felicity listened as Tommy worked on the door. Before long, she heard a banging noise which must have meant he was resorting to the battering ram. She was on the verge of giving up hope when she heard a crunch. Craning her neck, she looked up and thought she saw a shaft of light. 

“Tommy?” she called, her voice considerably weaker. 

“Hold on, Felicity. I’m coming.” 

She listened as he tore at the door and wanted to sob with relief. Felicity hadn’t realized until that very minute just how scared she’d been, trapped down here alone. Neither Dig nor Oliver had showed up in all the time she’d been here and it had to have been a good couple of hours at least. She tried not to let _that_ worry her too much. Right now, she had to focus on getting herself out of here. One thing at a time. 

Finally, with a deafening scrape of metal, she heard Tommy push the door open. There was the clatter of his footsteps on the stairs and then he was beside her. There was a flickering yellow glow and she realized he had a propane lantern with him. 

“That’s smart,” she said as he knelt down to inspect the shelves that were now laying over her hips and legs. 

“What is?” He pushed at the shelves, testing their weight. His hair was falling over his forehead, his face was smudged and his expression was grim. Everyone in the city was probably feeling a little grim right now, but given his relationship to Laurel who was at CNRI when the quake hit, she had a bad feeling. 

“The lantern. I should keep one down here, just in case,” she said, coughing a little. 

“Oh… Yeah, that. Power seems to be out all across the Glades, maybe even part of the city. It’s a mess out there,” he told her. “Here, this is light enough, I can lift it off you.”

“You sure?” she asked. She didn’t know Oliver’s best friend very well, but he’d always struck her as a vibrant character. That light she associated with him was decidedly dim at the moment. 

“Yep,” he said, getting up and pulling the shelving unit with him. He grunted as he shoved at it, pushing it off her body. As soon as the shelves cleared her body, her lower half burned with pain she hadn’t felt before. Her brain knew it was just the blood flowing to parts of her body that had been cut off from it for probably longer than was wise and was nothing to worry about. But her mouth wanted to cry out in pain anyhow. 

“You okay?” Tommy asked. He pushed the shelves away so they fell with a crash, thankfully away from her. 

“Yeah,” she gasped. “I think so.” 

He was kneeling again. She felt his hands on her legs, feeling for injury. “Can you feel this?” he asked. 

She nodded. 

“Think you can stand?”

“Only one way to find out,” she muttered. 

He took her hands and pulled her up carefully. Her legs and feet, other than being more than a little sore, tingled with sensation but seemed strong enough to support her. Still, Tommy kept his hands on her arms until he was sure she was steady. 

“You’re a tough cookie, Ms. Smoak,” he pronounced, sounding a bit more like his old self if not for the shadows she could see in his eyes. 

“Takes more than a shelving unit to take me out,” she said, a little breathlessly. 

“How about we get out of here?” He swept an arm towards the stairs and she preceded him walking up them. She saw the door as she passed. The entire locking mechanism had been smashed and a crowbar lay on the floor next to it. She blew out a grateful breath as she walked out into the empty and dark club. 

***

Felicity dropped onto a barstool while Tommy set the lantern on the bar, illuminating the space around them. 

“Want a drink?” he asked her as he moved around behind the bar. 

“What do you recommend?” she said, her tongue firmly in her cheek. 

“Whiskey.” 

“Straight up then, good sir.” 

She watched as he poured them both a generous tumbler full of the golden liquid. With a sigh, he took a seat on the barstool next to hers. Felicity took a long drink, trying not to react to the strong burn as it hit her throat.She swallowed and set the glass back on the bar top. Next to her, Tommy kept drinking. 

She watched as he slammed the empty glass down. Biting her lip, she leaned forward, resting her elbows on the bar. “Are you okay?” she asked him. 

He shook his head and she could see his eyes shining suspiciously in the light from the lantern. He lifted a hand and rubbed it over his forehead, shielding his eyes. “No, I’m not okay.”

That sick feeling she’d had before returned. “What happened?” she asked quietly. “Do you know where Oliver is.”

He huffed a little, a humorless laugh. “No, I do not know where Oliver is. He ran away and I wouldn’t blame him, if I wasn’t still so fucking pissed with him.”

Felicity blinked. “What happened?” she asked again. She knew the guys had had a falling out recently… over Oliver being the vigilante, over Laurel, over Tommy’s father… But something else was definitely going on here. 

“He took off on his bike after he watched Laurel die in the wreckage of CNRI.”Tommy grabbed the whiskey bottle and poured himself another glass. 

The air left Felicity’s lungs and she knew her expression resembled a fish out of water. Laurel… was dead? “How?” she whispered. 

“She wouldn’t leave. Her dad asked her to but she was trying to get client files out of the building. Ridiculous, really. But that was Laurel. She’d do anything to help people in her care, even if it was reckless. When the quake hit, she was getting everyone else out and… I don’t know if you’re familiar with CNRI but it’s a brick building, one of the oldest in the Glades.”

Felicity swallowed hard. Brick buildings didn’t go so well with earthquakes. “Oh, Tommy.” 

“I got there too late. I was on my way… Oliver had told me she was probably down there when he… and my dad…” He paused to clear his throat. “Anyhow. I hurried, but the roads were blocked and I had to pretty much go on foot for the last couple of miles. The quake hit while I was walking, actually. I stopped to help a woman whose car had veered into a fire hydrant, she couldn’t get her belt unbuckled.”

“You’re just a knight in shining armor tonight, Tommy Merlyn,” Felicity told him. 

The smile he gave her was very self-deprecating. “Yeah. For everyone but _her_.” 

Her face fell. Oh, god. “Tommy… I’m sorry. That was so thoughtless of me, I don’t know why—“

“Felicity,” he said, cutting her off. “It’s okay. I’m just… I wasn’t there. I should have been there, I could have gotten her out.”

She reached out, putting her hand on top of his, unsure what to say. Then again, it wasn’t like she didn’t have experience with losing someone like this. “Don’t blame yourself,” she cautioned him. “The Undertaking wasn’t your fault.”

“Undertaking? So that’s what the bastard called it?” Tommy snorted and took another drink from his glass, taking his time now. 

Felicity wasn’t sure what Oliver had shared with him, what she was free to share or not. “It was actually a group of Starling City elite…” she told him, biting her lip uncertainly. “This has been in the works for a long time. Years.”

Tommy turned round eyes on her. “Let me guess. Robert Queen was involved. And Moira.”

She paused and then nodded. “You might want to ask Oliver about the details.”

He scoffed. “I have no interest in seeing that bastard right now.” He gulped more of his whiskey, draining the glass for a second time. “Did you know he slept with the love of my life? Yeah. Just hours after he told me to fight for her.”His laugh was bitter. 

Felicity’s heart turned over. She knew something had happened with Oliver and Laurel in the last couple of days but hadn’t wanted to really know exactly _what_. She thought back to that brief moment when they’d believed they’d stopped the Undertaking and the light in Oliver’s eyes at the thought that he could be a normal man again… He must have gone straight to Laurel’s apartment.The knowledge sat in her gut like a lead weight. 

She glanced up to see Tommy watching her. Hoping to hide whatever her expression must be, she finished off her glass, savoring the spicy burn this time. 

“You have feelings for him,” Tommy said. It was a statement, not a question, and Felicity could feel her cheeks flaming. She hoped the lantern-light wasn’t bright enough to pick up on it. 

“He’s a good friend. And my partner in… vigilante-ing.”

“Listen. I get it,” he told her, his words just slightly slurred. “He’s an attractive man and he’s very focused and _dangerous_ and I know women dig that. Believe me, I know.”

“Tommy…”

“But you want to be careful. Because he _is_ dangerous and he breaks hearts right and left. You should have seen Laurel after the Gambit went down. For _years_ she was a wreck about it, it took over two years for her to even look at me as anything other than Oliver’s friend. Never mind I had been in love with her since we were thirteen years old. She only had eyes for _him_ and that asshole treated her awful. He cheated on her constantly, didn’t even try to hide it half the time.”

Felicity poured herself a second glass, not enjoying what she was hearing but knowing that Tommy wanted to vent. And shoot, maybe she needed to hear this. Tommy took the bottle from her and poured himself some more. She half thought about telling him maybe he’d had enough but then she thought that maybe he’d earned getting drunk tonight. After _everything_ , this was his right. 

“And maybe I encouraged it a bit, you know,” Tommy went on, regarding the tumbler before him but not taking a drink from it. “I think I thought that if I encouraged him to fuck around, that maybe Laurel would catch him at it and _finally_ dump his ass. I wanted her to be mad at him. Do you know how maddening it was to see her keep taking him back?”

“I… can’t imagine, actually,” Felicity admitted, swirling her tumbler around, watching how the lantern light was caught in the amber liquid. She’d had a boyfriend back in high school that cheated on her. She’d caught him behind the bleachers with his hand up the girl’s sweater. She’d told him to fuck off and that was that. The thought of having a boyfriend who repeatedly cheated and taking him back was… foreign to her. Equally foreign was the notion that _Oliver_ would do that. He’d changed so much since then, he was like a different person. 

“He’s not that guy anymore,” she told Tommy. 

“I thought he wasn’t Ollie too, but then he slept with my girlfriend.”

Felicity winced. If what Tommy was saying was accurate, and she had _no_ reason not to believe him, it sounded like he and Laurel weren’t on good footing when this happened. She didn’t want to believe that Laurel would have slept with Oliver while still together with Tommy, so they must have been broken up. On the other hand, she could understand where Tommy was coming from. When you lose someone you love, and she had unfortunate experience with that, you still loved them, regardless of the circumstances surrounding your relationship when they died. After all, she still loved Cooper, in a wistful sort of way, and he’d been gone for over three years now. So she did understand why he thought of Laurel as his girlfriend… that love doesn’t just go away. The bigger issue, in her mind, was how bitter Tommy clearly felt towards Oliver over the whole mess. 

“You two need to talk,” she said. 

“I told you, I don’t know where he is now and I don’t want to know. I don’t want to see him. He probably killed my father tonight and Laurel is dead and I never even got to say goodbye—“ He broke off suddenly a choked sob tearing from his throat. 

Felicity was up off the bar stool in a flash. Without hesitating, she wrapped her arms around Tommy. She barely knew the guy but he was hurting, badly. He was stiff at first but after a moment, he turned towards her and wrapped his arms around her too. She hugged him for a long moment, until she heard his breathing even out, telling her that the storm had, at least temporarily, passed. 

“I’m sorry,” he apologized, wiping at his eyes. 

She rubbed his shoulder. “Don’t be. Tommy, you lost someone very important to you. Tonight was a nightmare for a lot of people, but especially for you.”

He smiled gratefully at her, probably the first genuine smile she’d seen on him so far tonight. “If Ollie isn’t head over heels for you by now, he’s a goddamned fool.”

Her cheeks heated again. “He's given me the opportunity to help this city. To help him save this city.. That’s enough.” For now, she told herself. If she didn’t get her feelings in check soon, she wasn’t sure how much longer she could take being only platonic around him. “You don’t know where he is?”

Tommy shook his head. “He took off on that Ducati, but he wasn’t headed this direction. That’s all I know.”

“Do you know if he was hurt?” After all, he’d just battled Merlyn and Dig had been hurt enough to need to go get it looked at and she knew Oliver likely had some wounds that needed bandaging. 

“No idea.” Tommy didn’t seem terribly concerned. But he looked at her for a long moment and sighed. “You’re going to worry about him, aren’t you?” 

Felicity shrugged and reached around him for her half-full tumbler. “I can’t help myself.”

Tommy plucked the drink from her hand and set it back on the bar. “I have an idea.” 

“I was going to drink that.”

He stood up, shaking his head. “No, you’re not. Not if you’re going to go looking for Oliver where I think he might have gone. Let me get you some coffee instead.”

Her eyebrows flew up. “I thought you had no idea where he went.”

Tommy rolled his eyes as he moved around behind the bar, finding the coffee pot which still had some in it. He made a face before pouring it in a mug and sticking that in the small microwave that sat underneath the counter. “I meant that he didn’t leave me a forwarding address, not that I don’t still know that man as well as I know myself. Honestly, if I hadn’t come back here looking to get completely pissed, I probably would have gone there too.”

“Where is ‘there’?” She watched him pull the now-steaming mug from the microwave and push it across the counter to her. She took a sip and winced at the bitterness. It was strong, it’d get the job done alright. 

“About an hour out of town, up north, not far from the Canadian border. My family has a hunting cabin up there, in my mother’s name actually so my father wasn’t able to liquidate it. He always hated the place, but I loved it. Spent a lot of time there once I got my driver’s license and Ollie often came with me. Sometimes we’d go up there and party, sometimes we’d take girls up there, sometimes it’d be just us, hanging out, getting away from our families. It was a good place to go and think,” he told her. Then he shrugged. “I dunno, if I were looking to get out of town right away, that’s where I’d go. I bet he did too.”

Felicity chewed on her lip and took another gulp of the bitter coffee.“Do you remember the directions?” 

He shot her a deadpan look, making her laugh a little. “Give me a little credit, Smoak.”

Pulling a notepad and pen out from under the bar, he started to scribble out some directions.“You’ll forgive me for not offering to join you.”

“Of course,” she said. “You’re drunk.”

He snorted and took another drink. “Not yet, but I’m working on it. Plus, I’m still not ready to see him.”

She nodded. “Right. So how’s the cell service up there?” 

“Shitty.” 

“Can you let Dig know, if he comes around, where I’ve gone? I expect I’ll just be finding him, stitching him up if he needs it, giving him a good old-fashioned pep talk. Then we’ll be back here before you know it.”

“Sure, I can clue in the big man.” 

“Uhm… do you have another lantern around?” she asked hopefully. 

“No, but I do have some flashlights.”He retrieved them for her and she tested out one of them before nodding her satisfaction. 

Felicity started back towards the lair. Then she stopped and turned around. “Can you… maybe see about fixing the door or something? Or just making sure no one can get down there? It’s just there’s a lot of sensitive material down there—“

Tommy lifted a hand. “I get it, Felicity. Sure, I’ll keep an eye on things.”

She smiled at him. “Thanks, Tommy.For everything.”

‘Thank _you_. For the pep talk. You’re a good shoulder to cry on, Smoak.” 

Wouldn’t be the first time she’d heard that. “No problem, Merlyn.”

***

Felicity held one flashlight in her hand. The other was propped up so it lit up the med area they had set up. Everything was covered in dust and chunks of concrete and she felt more than a little nervous being down here. Especially when little tremors would rattle through. Her heart rate would skyrocket and she’d pause, ready to run for cover or the stairs or whatever. But so far, the tremors remained small and ineffectual and while more dust would rain down, so far that was the only thing. 

Still, she wasn’t interested in taking more time, than she needed to, down here. 

She had a red duffle, that she found with Oliver’s things, opened as she sorted through the supplies. Felicity debated about grabbing some of Oliver’s blood and then decided it was better to be safe than sorry. She could stop at a convenience store on her way out of town and grab a styrofoam cooler and some ice to keep it cold. Needles, bandages, surgical thread, butterfly bandages, antibiotics, painkillers, salve… 

Almost as an afterthought, she stopped by Oliver’s wooden locker and grabbed a small pouch of island herbs. She wasn’t entirely sure how they worked, but she knew he relied on them for a lot of different purposes and it couldn’t hurt. Felicity also sorted through some of the clothes that Oliver kept in the lair. She took out a couple pairs of sweatpants, a pair of cargos, a couple t-shirts and a couple pairs of boxer briefs. _Those_ she tried not to think about too much as she tucked them into the duffle with everything else. 

Felicity kept some spare clothes around as well. Mostly just some workout wear for when Dig trained her, but she also had a spare set of jeans and a couple of t-shirts and some sneakers, along with a bra and underwear. She packed those, just in case she was kept overnight at this cabin. It was the middle of the night right now, probably edging towards dawn, and she was going to be exhausted once all this adrenaline wore off. 

Hefting the bag on her shoulder, she took the flashlights and headed up the stairs. She didn’t see Tommy at the bar any longer, but looking around she saw a dim light coming from the manager’s office upstairs and surmised he’d holed himself up there for the time being. Her heart went out to the poor guy. It also reminded her that Oliver was going to be a bit of a mess when she finally found him too. She knew just enough about his history with Laurel Lance to know that her death would shake him. Hard. 

Outside of Verdant, the Glades were in an uproar. She could see smoke and flickering flames over the rooftops several blocks away. Sirens wailed and there were just a lot of people around for the hour of night. Or was it morning?It unsettled Felicity that she had no idea what time it was. 

Her Mini was parked in the small lot next door to the club. She tossed the duffle into the back and then got behind the wheel, tossing her purse onto the passenger seat.Her cell phone was dead, having run out of battery ages ago. She turned the car on and then plugged the phone into the adapter. It began charging up and she noticed there was no signal. Not surprising, given the power issues the city was dealing with. Made sense that a cell tower or two had been affected as well. She also noticed that it was just four o’clock in the morning. 

Good thing for that coffee Tommy had pushed on her. She felt beyond awake, a little jittery even. And no hint of tipsiness remained whatsoever. 

The streets around Verdant were hit and miss, with more miss than hit. Abandoned cars, burning cars (were people really starting riots during a disaster?), people everywhere, emergency vehicles… general chaos. 

“This is when having a tiny car is a good thing, _Oliver_ ,” she muttered to herself as she carefully navigated between two abandoned cars on an otherwise deserted street. Oliver always rolled his eyes at her tiny car, saying it was ridiculous, useless, whatever. She liked her tiny car. It suited her. And right now, it was proving to be dead handy. 

It took a while before she got free of the chaos and onto streets that were lit with electricity. Even then, Felicity decided she’d feel better stopping somewhere outside of the city. Starling was in an uproar right now. She wasn’t normally a nervous sort of person, thinking nothing of parking her car in the Glades night after night and walking by herself in the wee hours. But with the crap that had gone down in this city in the last day? Better safe than sorry. 

There was a convenience store and gas station on the interstate just out of town. She decided it was a good place to stop; it was well lit and there were a few lonely travelers stopped in. After topping off the Mini’s gas tank, she went into the store. The cooler and ice were easy enough to locate. She also grabbed some food to take with her. Things like chips, bottled water, a couple packaged sandwiches. The cabin had to have some sort of food preparation facilities so she also grabbed some cans of soup and a can of spaghettios too. She’d always liked spaghettios as a kid. A box of cereal, carton of milk, loaf of sliced bread, a tub of butter and some jelly rounded out her haul. She paid the bored looking clerk and carried the bags out to the Mini. 

She transferred Oliver’s blood to the cooler, pouring the bag of ice on top. She set the sandwiches and carton of milk on top of that. The cooler had to go in the backseat as there was no more room in her trunk. 

Felicity walked back into the store to get herself a cup of coffee. This time, she fixed it up the way she liked it, with cream and sugar. She took a bracing sip, hummed her contentment, paid for the beverage, and walked back out to the car. Then, it was back behind the wheel with Tommy’s scribbled instructions sitting on the seat next to her. 

Before she left the lot, she turned on her favorite playlist on her phone, nodding as the music started playing through the car speakers. Taking a long drink of her coffee before settling it in the cupholder, she pulled out of the lot and back onto the interstate. 

Traffic was light, given the hour and that not many people who were leaving Starling tonight were probably headed north. There wasn’t much that was north besides Canada and most people were probably headed to the larger cities to the east and south of the city. As such, she was able to think while she drove without having to keep her mind on the traffic too much. 

What a hell of a day. Actually, the last couple of weeks had been insane, staring with her infiltrating that underground casino and Oliver coming to her rescue. From there, they’d been 100% busy with dealing with the Undertaking. She’d hacked Merlyn Global, been brought down to the police station for questioning (and hadn’t _that_ made her more scared than she’d been since Cooper was arrested back at MIT). She’d helped Lance dismantle the one earthquake device, only to learn there was another and absolutely _no_ time to stop it before it went off. 

She replayed that moment in her mind, like a bad record. The sinking dread that filled her belly. Oliver’s horrified voice over the comms. That sickening _rumble_ that filled the foundry basement like the roar of a freight train. The lights flickering over her head, the ceiling crumbling. The worry she’d had ever since about her friends, about Dig and Oliver and if they were okay. 

That’s why she was doing this right now, driving an hour north of town on the off-chance that Oliver had gone to this cabin. If he had, he was alone, probably wounded and hurting in his soul. Dig had Carly to help him, but Oliver was alone. He needed her, whether he’d admit it or not. And he probably wouldn’t. In fact, Felicity wouldn’t be surprised if he took one look at her and told her to go back home. 

She was prepared to dig in her heels though. She was a part of this team and he was her teammate. And, more than that, was how she felt about him. He was… well, he wasn’t a _friend,_ exactly. But she’d like it if they were and she felt they were moving in the direction. All that aside, she’d had a crush on him since he’d first strolled into her cubicle all those months ago. He’d turned her whole life on its ear. At first, it’d terrified her. Felicity had told Oliver that she didn’t want to join the team, except to help them find Walter. She thought she wanted to go back to her boring, safe life. But… working with Dig and Oliver had awoken something in her that had been sleeping since she’d lost Cooper. 

Helping Oliver on his crusade gave her life meaning. _He_ gave her life meaning. She wasn’t about to turn away from him now. And the fact of the matter was, somewhere along the way she’d fallen in love with him. Maybe it was while she’d held his hand while he coded on the table after being shot by his mother. She didn’t know. But the urgent feeling that filled her heart right now was primarily responsible for why she found herself on the road at 4:30 in the morning after the most traumatic night of her life. 

She had to get to Oliver. She had to help him. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Felicity finds the cabin, but what will she find inside? Has she bitten off more than she can chew?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Art by fistis. 
> 
> Beta by the-silverforked-sky. Truly, this thing would be a mess without her. She's been INVALUABLE.

It took Felicity a little longer than an hour to find the hunting cabin, mostly because she’d taken a wrong exit off the interstate. The sun was just rising as she drove off the highway and onto a smaller road that wound up the mountain, deeper into the woods. The trees grew denser and denser, blocking out the light of the new day, and the road grew narrower and narrower. Soon, she left the pavement altogether. 

Her Mini slipped a little on the dirt and gravel so she went slow. Finally, she found the turnoff she needed, a left at the bright red mailbox next to the granite boulder. The dirt driveway she pulled onto was barely wide enough for her Mini with overgrown fern and tree branches hanging over the path. Clearly, no one came up here anymore. Even with her headlights, it was too difficult to see if there were any fresh tracks in the dirt or not. 

The dirt path wound through the trees for another minute or so before the trees finally parted to reveal a small clearing. In that clearing, she saw a humble log structure. No light came from the windows, no smoke from the chimney… making her wonder if he was here after all. There was no sign of the Ducati… no sign of _anything_. Felicity began to doubt as she parked the Mini alongside the cabin. 

There was a porch that spanned the front of the building. The construction reminded her of Lincoln logs. The cabin was small, but clearly was more than just a rustic shack. To be honest, it looked like something a billionaire would build wanting to capture a “simpler” image of life. 

Felicity stepped up onto the porch and tried to peer into the windows. Curtains obscured most of what lay beyond, but she didn’t detect any movement. Or any sounds. Biting her lip, she banged her fist on the door. Nothing. 

“Oliver?” she called. 

Still nothing. 

She grumbled in frustration, stepping down off the porch. Checking her phone, she saw that Tommy was right; there was absolutely no signal whatsoever up here. She saw a small path leading around the back of the cabin and followed that. At the rear of the cabin, there was another small porch and… the Ducati! It was tucked into the woods a little, leaned up against a tree, but it was there. She almost sobbed in relief.

He was up here. He’d brought the Ducati up here, just as Tommy expected he had. A weight lifted off of her with that realization. _He was here_. 

She checked the backdoor and found the knob turned easily enough. Pushing it open, she called out tentatively, “Oliver? It’s Felicity.”

She didn’t hear anything and she stepped in, closing the door behind her. The cabin was dark as the trees were hiding the rising sun. She fumbled along the wall next to the door, praying this place was hooked up to electricity, and found a switch. The small room, a mud-room/storage closet really, was suddenly bathed in light and she blew out another relieved breath. Thank god Merlyn hadn’t been so finicky about his utility bills as to cut off a cabin that didn’t get much use. 

There was a stone basin sink, some hooks to hang jackets and such on, cabinets that she assumed were for hunting weapons. Charming. Suppressing a shudder, she moved out of the room and into a short hallway. Flicking on another light switch, she saw a living room and kitchen area beyond the hallway, including the front door. The hallway had two doors, one to her left and one to the right. The one on the right was ajar and she pushed inside. 

“Oliver?”

There was a moan and she fumbled for another light switch but wasn’t able to find it right away. Using the light from the hallway, she hurried forward towards the silhouette of a bed where she assumed the moan had come from. On the table next to the bed was a lamp and she turned it on. 

Felicity had to stifle a gasp at the sight before her. Oliver lay sprawled across the mattress, still in his leathers and atop the covers. His hood was down but the green greasepaint remained around his eyes, though she could make out tear tracks that had her heart aching. He was asleep… or unconscious. She could see his chest rising and falling, the sweat glistening on his forehead. And… oh god. He was bleeding. 

She sat on the bed next to him and leaned over to have a better look. The dark bloom of blood encompassed almost his entire shoulder. She couldn’t tell more without taking it off.His breathing was a little on the shallow side and a hand on his forehead told her he was burning up with a fever. 

It was all more than enough to catapult her into action. She jumped up from the bed and bent down to touch his arm. He didn’t so much as flinch. “I’ll be right back,” she told him. 

Felicity hurried out the front door and off the porch to where she’d parked the Mini. It took three trips but she got everything she’d brought into the cabin. It took a little investigating but she found a smallish refrigerator (next to a large chest-style freezer) in the kitchen and put the sandwiches and milk in there. She left the rest of the groceries on the counter and proceeded to go through the first aid supplies she’d brought. She needed to bring his fever down and see to his wound. Probably the latter first. But to do that, she’d need to get him out of his hood, jacket and shirt. She took the scissors out of the bag and bit her lip, hoping she wouldn’t have to cut anything off of him. She knew that hood was important to him. 

In the end, she left everything in the duffle and took that into the room and set it next to the bed. “I’m back,” she told him. Oliver moaned a little, his head flopping to the side, but otherwise didn’t acknowledge her. She swallowed back her fear and got to work. 

Getting Oliver’s hood off of him while trying not to cause him any more unnecessary pain was a struggle, and so was trying to lift him enough to get the job done. She started with his uninjured arm and shoulder and once she got that side free, it was easier to pull the other off. Which left his jacket and the shirt he wore underneath. The jacket was more difficult and he was moaning in pain by the time she had him free, fresh sweat standing out on his forehead. Her heart lurched as she let the jacket fall to the floor behind her. 

His black shirt was damp where the wound was and she could make out the frayed, torn edges of the fabric but not the scope of the injury beyond it. She brought up the scissors and began to cut the shirt away. The jacket and the hood were saved, but the shirt could easily be replaced and Felicity couldn’t bear to cause him any more pain. She eased the suspenders that held his pants up off his shoulders as she worked. By the time she had the fabric snipped away, her heart was in her throat. The wound was terrible and looked to be getting infected. She’d lifted him enough to see that there was a corresponding wound on his back. Whatever had happened, be it an arrow or a bullet, it had gone through his body. That it hadn’t pierced his heart was a miracle. 

Oliver was coming around more, his breathing labored and his groans and moans speaking to the pain he felt. Felicity put a hand on his shoulder and pulled a little, to get his attention. 

“Oliver? It’s Felicity. I need you to roll onto your side for me. I need to clean out this wound, stitch and bandage you. Okay?” 

He didn’t say anything, but when she got behind and pushed as gently as she could on his wounded shoulder, he rolled for her. She got him braced on his side, propped by pillows. The bedspread underneath him was stained with blood, which she tried to ignore. She poked carefully at the wound, finally deciding she’d need to clear the blood away so she could have a better look. 

Felicity found a bathroom off the kitchen and in it, towels stacked in a cabinet. First, she washed her hands as thoroughly as she could, using the hand-soap she found under the counter and scrubbing under hot water. She took a few towels out and wet one of them with warm water. She took a few more with her as she returned to the bedroom and to Oliver’s side. Biting her lip, she debated painkillers for a second before deciding to go ahead with the lidocaine. To say that she detested needles was probably putting things mildly, but Oliver was in pain and cleaning out his wound would likely put him through even _more_. She wanted to avoid that if she could. 

She found a syringe in the med kit and a vial of lidocaine and carefully measured out a dose. Then, holding her breath, she stuck the needle into the meat of Oliver’s shoulder, just above the wound and pressed down on the plunger. 

“Sorry,” she murmured as she withdrew the needle and disposed of it properly. Shuddering, she stuffed that back into the kit to empty out later. After a moment, Felicity noticed Oliver’s breathing even out a little and he seemed to relax. That was good, the pain relief was taking effect. 

“I’m preemptively sorry for this,” she told him a moment later just before she began to clean the wound. It required her swallowing back her own gag reflex at the torn skin and blood, but it actually wasn’t too bad. She’d stitched Oliver up a few times now, nothing as major as this, but she thought maybe she was getting used to blood and gore. Just a little, though. The less she saw of Oliver’s blood, the better, in her mind. 

She had to rinse out the towel and return to it but after a few minutes, she finally had everything wiped clean. The wound was still bleeding and she held one of the towels to the back as she inspected the front. It didn’t seem like a bullet wound. The entrance and exit wounds were so similar in size. Felicity had to assume it was an arrow. She hadn’t thought Merlyn would be _that_ bad a shot as to miss his heart by so much, but then Oliver was pretty quick on his feet. 

Next, she poured some iodine solution from the med kit over the wound to sterilize it as best she could. It made a terrible mess, which she tried to soak up as best she could with the towels.She idly hoped there was a washer or dryer here at the cabin as she worked.When she was satisfied, she got out the surgical needle and thread and carefully stitched both wounds. Her hands shook a little, the coffee was wearing off and exhaustion was creeping in, but with some focus, she was able to keep her stitches neat, small and even. It just took her forever (and a lot of breathing through her mouth). 

By the time she was finished, Oliver was starting to moan again. The lidocaine must be wearing off a little. She bandaged his shoulder as quickly and carefully with some dressing from the med kit, wrapping his shoulder in gauze to hold the gauze pads in place. Then, before she settled him back down on his back, she pulled away the bedspread as well as she could with him still lying atop most of it. Thankfully, the blood hadn’t soaked through to the blankets beneath yet. She pulled him down onto his back and then scrambled around the bed to pull the bedspread from underneath his other shoulder. She kicked the soiled linens to the floor, vowing to deal with them later. 

First, she had to attend to Oliver’s fever. He was still perspiring and felt entirely too warm for her liking. She wet a washcloth with cold water and brought it back to him, placing it over his forehead. Then, she took the pouch of island herbs she’d brought with her into the kitchen to make a tea. She’d watched Oliver do this several times now and knew what potency to try to achieve. 

She used a mug from the cupboard and poured the nasty smelling concoction into it. Better him than her, she mused as she carried it to him. Getting Oliver to drink the tea proved a little difficult as he was still unconscious. But she was able to dribble some of the tea into his mouth. It wasn’t enough to make her feel satisfied, but perhaps it would help him come around and be able to drink more later. In the meantime, she’d keep him cool with compresses and watch him to make sure he didn’t take a turn for the worse. 

Her efforts would do for now. She was too tired to do much more anyhow. She had just enough left in her to shed her shoes, cardigan and dress and slip into the yoga pants and t-shirt she had stuffed into the duffle bag. Maybe tomorrow, she’d take a shower. 

As the rising sun finally illuminated the cabin, Felicity crawled into the bed next to Oliver, careful not to jostle him or disturb him in any way and curled up on her side, falling asleep almost the moment her head hit the pillow. 

***

Felicity slept hard for about five hours. No dreams, no shifting in her sleep, nothing. When she woke with a start, the afternoon sun filtering through the trees and curtains of the room she was in, she was met immediately with a pang of guilt. She sat up and leaned over Oliver, surveying his condition. 

He was still warmer than she cared for, though not quite burning up as he had been. His breathing also wasn’t as shallow. Felicity chastised herself as she got up to replace the compress on his head. He could have died while she was sleeping and she wouldn’t have known until she woke up. 

She returned with a fresh washcloth, wet with cold water. She mopped at his face and chest a little before laying it over his forehead. He seemed to relax, but didn’t wake. Since she felt refreshed from her little “nap”, she decided to make herself productive before returning to her vigil at Oliver’s side. 

First, she explored the cabin. It was small, but clearly owned by a billionaire with it’s upgraded fixtures and designer furnishings. She found a washer and dryer behind a set of bifold doors in the mudroom she’d initially entered the cabin through. Pleased with that discovery, she proceeded to gather up the towels and bedspread to wash. She pre-treated the blood stains as well as she could with the supplies she had on hand and stuffed everything into the washer, grateful it had an extra-large drum to handle the bulky load. 

Her stomach growled as she started up the machine so she wandered into the kitchen and nosed into the groceries she’d brought. She didn’t feel like warming anything up, she instead grabbed one of the convenience store sandwiches, unwrapped it, and took a huge bite. 

“Oh, god, so good,” she moaned as she chewed. 

Felicity ended up finishing half of the sandwich before rewrapping it and placing it back in the refrigerator. Oliver had to be getting thirsty or hungry. She debated for a moment before deciding that setting up an IV for him would be the best way to get some fluids in him right away. Gah, back to the needles! 

She blew out a breath, steadied herself and gathered her nerve, then headed back into the bedroom. She’d packed the IV solution, hoping it wouldn’t be needed, but she was glad she had. She kept her hands steady as she set up the IV, feeding into Oliver’s arm. There was no rack to hang the bag from but Felicity improvised by hanging it from the light fixture that hung over the bed using a ball of twine she found in a drawer. 

Satisfied with her work, she decided it was past time she took a shower. Felicity grabbed the jeans and a fresh t-shirt from the duffle along with the underwear and bra. On her way to the bathroom, she stopped by the washing machine to move the load to the dryer so she could wash her clothes. It wasn’t like she could toss Oliver’s leathers into the wash but she could wash his hood so she threw that in too. She also gave the towels another run through the wash as some of the blood stains were being resistant. 

The hot shower felt like magic on her skin. She hadn’t realized how sore and _dirty_ she felt. It felt like a whole layer of dust was finally washed away from her skin and it was sad how accurate that probably was. She’d found some shampoo and conditioner in the cabinet underneath the sink and used that to wash her hair. As she rinsed, she started to feel human again. It felt as though a majority of the horror of the previous day was now swirling down the drain. Good riddance to it. 

Refreshed, she toweled off, with one of the only remaining clean towels that wasn’t in the wash, and then dressed. She had a brush in her purse, which she used on her blonde curls before pulling her hair back into its customary ponytail. Her hair would probably dry frizzy but… at least it’d be out of her face. 

Felicity was just leaving the bathroom when she heard some noises from inside the bedroom. She rushed in and saw Oliver shifting on the bed, his eyes open. He was pulling at the IV line, looking confused. 

“Oliver!”

He stiffened and his head whipped to look at her. She could see that he wasn’t expecting to see her. “Felicity?” His voice was raspy and rough. 

“Wait, hold on!” she said, holding up a finger. She retrieved the mug with the herb tea she’d tried to give him last night and rushed out of the room. She warmed it quickly in the microwave, dancing on the pads of her feet as she waited for it to finish. Almost as an afterthought, she wet another washcloth to bring in to him. After a quick stir to eliminate any hot spots, she took it back into the bedroom. 

He still looked like a wreck. His eyes were sunken, his cheeks pale and his lips chapped. He was still sweating and she knew the fever wasn’t broken yet. His eyes rolled towards her as she walked over to him. 

Carefully, Felicity helped him hold his head up so he could drink some of the herb concoction. He seemed to know what it was without her having to tell him, which was good. When he’d drunk nearly the entire mug, he sighed and she let him lay back down on the pillow. 

“Felicity…” he said again. 

“Shh…” she said, replacing the compress on his forehead. “Just rest for now. I’ve got you.”

His eyes fell shut. 

She spent the better part of the rest of the day watching over him. He had a few more nearly lucid moments.When he slept, his rest was mostly fitful and he mumbled a lot of things. Some she didn’t catch, but what she did seemed to have to do with Laurel. Her heart went out to him. Oliver loved Laurel and now she was dead. She knew the man well enough to know he’d likely be blaming himself, which made everything just that much worse. 

It wasn’t until the sun was starting to slip behind the trees that Felicity thought to see if the cabin had a landline she could call from. Save for work, when was the last time she’d even used a landline? Sure enough, there was a wall mounted phone in the kitchen, next to the small pantry. She lifted the receiver and found a dial-tone. 

The first call she made was to Diggle. She had to call collect since there was no long-distance service. Shoot, she almost didn’t remember _how_ to call collect. Dig readily accepted the charges.

“Felicity?”

“Hey Dig. Uhm, I’m just calling to tell you not to worry about me or… or Oliver. And to see if you could maybe get ahold of Thea?”

“What’s going on? Where are you?”

“Tommy told me he thought Oliver might have gone to this old hunting cabin the two of them used to use when they were younger, so I came up here and sure enough, he was here. Nearly bleeding out, but I brought a med kit with me and I’ve got him on the mend.”

“Oh my god, Felicity. Are you sure? I can head up there and help you out or give you both a ride back or—“

“It’s fine, Dig. I have it under control, for now at least. I promise to call if I need you.”

“How is he?” Dig asked and Felicity knew he wasn’t asking about his physical condition. 

“You heard about Laurel?” she asked. 

“Yep.”

“He hasn’t really been… with it. But I think he’s going to be pretty messed up.”

“If anyone can talk him through it, Felicity, it’s you.”

“Thanks for that, Dig. I’ll need all the encouragement I can get, I think.”

She hung up with him, after making him promise again to give Thea a call. 

***

Oliver woke to the sound of birds chirping, which was unusual. Even the nights he slept at the mansion, he didn’t usually hear birds first thing in the morning. He blinked his eyes open, his eyelids heavy and saw dappled sunlight filtering through unfamiliar curtains. 

The next thing he was aware of was the warm body that was just barely touching his. He looked over, surprised to see a riot of blonde curls spilling over the pillow next to his. A rounded shoulder met the edge of the blanket that covered her. It was a woman. And that hair… 

_Felicity?_

He rolled onto his back, blinking at the ceiling. The room was vaguely familiar and there was something niggling at him about this place and why he was here. Why _was_ he here? And what was Felicity doing here with him? 

He shifted a little and pain radiated from his shoulder. Looking down, he saw a large bandage just above his heart and gauze covering it and wrapping around to his back. He noticed the IV in his arm when he lifted it to check the bandage. His mouth tasted like the inside of an old gym shoe, which told him he’d drunk some island herb tea recently. 

He’d been hurt… how…? He closed his eyes for a moment and a series of horrible scenes played out across his memory. Confronting Malcolm Merlyn, the battle on the rooftop, killing Merlyn, learning there was another earthquake device, the shaking…shaking…shaking… He could feel it even downtown, on that rooftop as he scrambled to the edge and watched a portion of the Glades crumble as though the ground beneath it was liquified. 

He remembered Felicity’s quiet tears over the comm, the realization that Laurel was down at CNRI even though he had _told_ her to stay out of the Glades…He remembered rocketing towards CNRI on his Ducati, ignoring all the cries for help around him, singular in his goal to get to Laurel’s side as quickly as possible. 

…But he’d been too late. 

_She was pinned under a slab of concrete, a length of rebar stabbing up through her sternum, blood trickling from her lips as she trembled. Oliver had rushed to her side, pushing his hood back. Her eyes had widened as she saw it was him underneath that hood, realizing it had been him all along._

_He hadn’t wanted to tell her that way, he hadn’t wanted her to find out his secret at all. He’d never planned to tell Laurel his secret. Her eyes as she tried to wrap her mind around it all broke his heart all over again. He tried to shush her, get her to stay still, promising her help was coming and begging her to hold on._

_“Ollie,” she gasped weakly. “You’re… a killer?”_

_His own heart threatened to stop then and there. “No,” he protested, his hands fluttering around her, not sure where to touch her, finally landing on her face and neck. “Laurel… no. Stay with me, okay? Don’t close your eyes.”_

_“Ollie,” she murmured, even quieter. He nearly didn’t hear it over the shouting outside, the sirens, the crumbling cement raining down around them. Her eyes drifted shut and he shook her._

_“Laurel! No!Stay with me!”_

_But she was gone. He felt the life leave her as much as he saw it. And it felt like a chasm had opened up in his heart, threatening to swallow him along with it. Laurel.She was gone._

_One sob escaped him… two… But then the sound of people talking grew nearer and he knew he had to leave. He wiped at his eyes with his gloved hands, sat back and stood up. He wouldn’t look at her again. He couldn’t see her like that. He averted his eyes as he drew his hood back up and then ducked back out the way he’d come in, through the back entrance._

_He saw Tommy, briefly, as he mounted the Ducati.He was standing at the entrance to the alley, looking shellshocked. They’d locked eyes for a moment before Oliver pulled his helmet on and roared off into the night. At first, he hadn’t had any specific destination in mind. He just wanted to drive and drive and keep driving until he drove off the edge of the world.Eventually, he found himself up in the mountains. Remembering this old hunting cabin, he let memory lead him to the only place he could think of where he could just collapse and let the darkness finally swallow him whole._

But it hadn’t. The darkness had been fought away while he’d been unconscious. _Felicity_. Somehow, she knew to come here, find him, patch him up and nurse him back to health. 

Oliver turned his head to regard her again. She was faced away from him, towards the window that was letting in the sunlight. Was it morning or afternoon? He couldn’t tell. How long had she been here, taking care of him? _Why_ had she come? 

As though she’d felt his eyes on her back, Felicity suddenly stilled and then rolled over towards him. When she saw him watching her, she flushed a little and offered a small smile. 

“Hey.”

“Hey,” he replied. His voice was hoarse. He felt coated in sweat and grime. He had to look like an utter mess. But he was alive. 

Remembering what had happened, however, he wasn’t so sure that was a good thing. 

“How are you feeling?” she asked as she pushed up to a sitting position. Her small hand reached up to feel his forehead. 

“Sore,” he replied. “Hungry.”

“Feverish, at all?” she asked. 

“No chills. I ache though, I feel… weak.” 

Felicity nodded. “You just sweated out the fever to end all fevers,” she told him. “I should have known you wouldn’t do anything by halves.”He watched as she stood up from the bed, smoothing a hand over her ponytail. “You said you were hungry. I have a sandwich for you or I could heat up some soup or there’s some cereal…”

“Soup,” he said.“And thank you.” 

With a nod, Felicity walked from the room. He still didn’t know why she was here, but he had mixed feelings. On the one hand, she brightened every room she entered. With her babbles, her smiles, her enormous heart… How many times over the last eight months had she made him smile, even when he hadn’t particularly felt like smiling? She took care of him, of Diggle, of their little fledgling team. As such, she took care of the city. She had enormous skills with computers, so much that if she had half a mind to, she could probably dismantle governments and crash economies without hardly breaking a sweat. But she used those skills to help instead. She was just a good person and that goodness tended to rub off on those around her. 

But that was the problem as well. Because right now, Oliver wasn’t much in the mood to feel good or happy or anything other than wretched and wrecked. He wanted to be alone, dammit. He needed time and space to feel the sting of his failure and the ache of his loss. Felicity was a _distraction_ from that. Some might argue he could use a good distraction. But Oliver had learned too many times what could come from distractions to be naïve about it. 

Laying in this bed wasn’t where he wanted to be just then either. He’d never been good at playing the invalid, even as a child, and he wasn’t interested in starting now. He carefully removed his IV line and got to his feet. He felt dizzy, weak. He ached all over, not just his shoulder. He was wearing just his leather pants and he saw his jacket nearby, presumably from when Felicity had taken them off of him. He also noticed the duffle bag and went to investigate. 

Finding the clothes she’d packed for him, he left the bedroom and made a beeline for the bathroom, hearing the sounds of Felicity humming as she prepared the soup in the kitchen. The domesticity of the scene tugged at something within him as he shut and locked the bathroom door. 

The hot shower ended up being just what he needed. Once he’d washed off the grime, the sweat, the dried blood and the stink of the Undertaking, he felt stronger. And he’d need to be stronger in order to not let his guard down around Felicity. 

***

Felicity was surprised when Oliver joined her in the kitchen. He was dressed in a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt, his feet bare and his hair wet. She should have known better than to expect him to stay in bed. 

“Feeling better?” she asked. 

He nodded, looking uncertain. “Is there anything I can do?” 

Felicity shook her head. “Nope, just have a seat.” She ladled some soup into a bowl and brought it to him. She also got him a bottle of water and a box of crackers. When she’d served up her own bowl, she sat down across from him at the little table. 

He was eating, she observed gladly, barely pausing between spoonfuls of soup. After a minute or so, he dug into the crackers, eating those too. She was glad to see his appetite up and running. 

“How’s your pain?” she asked. 

He shrugged. “It aches but I’ve had worse.”

Felicity made a frustrated noise as she set her spoon down and got up. “Just because you’ve had worse doesn’t mean you should let yourself suffer.” She found the bottle of over the counter painkillers she’d brought with her and placed it on the table. “For once, can you be less of a man about this?” 

Oliver eyed the bottle and then peered up at her. She sighed and dropped into her chair. “I know it’s probably too much to ask,” she grumbled. 

“If it’ll make you happy, I’ll take some,” he said, opening the bottle and shaking a couple pills into his palm. 

“It _will_ make me happy. Thank you.”

The rest of their lunch passed in peaceful silence. Felicity got out the cookies she’d purchased when they finished their soup and Oliver gratefully dug into those, taking out three cookies, just to start. She grinned to herself at his sweet tooth. 

As they finished eating, Oliver started to pull away. She could tell in the way he did everything but physically pull away from the table. He fell quiet, his eyes shuttered, his expression grew darker and more somber. 

Felicity cleared the dishes, washing them and setting them in the rack that sat on the counter next to the sink. Then she returned to the table. “Oliver?”

She had to call two more times to get his attention. He looked up, his eyes still dark. “Hmm?”

“What’s on your mind?”

Oliver glanced towards the window, where the sun was already starting to move towards the western horizon. “Maybe you should head back to Starling. I’m okay now.”

She pulled her chair next to his and sat in it. “Leave you here? Not gonna happen.”

“Felicity…” He sounded pained. 

“Listen. I didn’t just come here to bandage your physical wounds. I know you’re hurting and I know why. I can’t leave you alone like this.”

The darkness in his eyes was filled with storms of emotion. She saw all of them swirling as he looked at her. “This has nothing to do with you, Felicity,” he said, his voice low and verging on threatening. 

Felicity knew what he was going to try to do. Push her away, lash out like an injured wildcat, yell her out of the cabin and back to Starling where she’d… what? Be safe from him? Hardly. She hadn’t been safe from this man since the moment he stepped into her cubicle. 

“It has to do with _you_ , Oliver, which means that it has to do with me too. Because I’m your friend, I’m your partner, and I care about you.”

“Well, you shouldn’t,” he growled. “I’m not worth it, Felicity.”

Anger surged. “Don’t say that! You don’t get to decide that for me, Oliver Queen. You’re not the one who decides other people’s feelings. And you’re wrong. You _are_ worth it. Everything I’ve seen over the last year shows me a man who cares so deeply about his city and the people in his life that he’s willing to sacrifice everything. That is a _good man_.”

Some of the strength sapped out of Oliver and his shoulders slumped. He looked down at the table, his face twisted in pain. “I failed, Felicity. I failed to save the city, my mother is going to prison, Laurel _died_ …”

Felicity blew out a breath and scooted closer to Oliver. She reached out and took his hand, which had been sitting, clenched, on his knee. “You didn’t fail, Oliver,” she assured him. With her thumbs, she rubbed at his fingers until they loosened and she was able to wrap her own fingers around his. “Imagine if you hadn’t been there, if the Undertaking had gone off without any hitches. Your mom wouldn’t have warned the city in time for so many to be able to evacuate, both devices would have gone off which would have doubled the damage…”

“Felicity…” he whispered, pained. He still didn’t look up at her. “I know what you’re trying to do.”

“Laurel wouldn’t have even known she should get out of there.” At that, Oliver did look up, his eyes wide and blue on hers. “She would have been at work, going about her business and that building would have still fallen on her. It would have fallen on everyone in there. And that would have happened in every building throughout the Glades. Oliver, without you, the destruction would have been catastrophic.”

He was staring at her as though she’d just told him she’d found the cure for cancer in her spare time. She could see unshed tears shining in his eyes. He didn’t speak, but he squeezed her hand and she squeezed back. She gave him a moment to collect himself, waiting while he ducked his head and swallowed thickly. 

“I just… I don’t know how to shed this guilt I feel. It’s everywhere, crushing me,” he told her, his voice breaking a little and she was off her chair in a flash. 

She threw her arms around him, ending up in his lap before she even thought through what she was doing, willing him to feel the force of her belief in him. Hearing that wobble in his voice nearly broke her heart and she couldn’t not try to comfort him in any way that she could. He needed this, he needed to know he wasn’t some sort of monster and that she would never see him that way. 

“Oliver… don’t give in to those feelings,” she urged him, her face pressed to his shoulder. 

He shook a little in her arms and she held him tighter. Then, she felt his arm come around her, holding her to him. It was the first time he’d held her like this, shoot, this was the closest she’d ever been to him. Plus, god, he smelled _amazing_. 

After a long moment, Felicity drew back to check on him and found Oliver looking at her with the strangest expression. It was soft and simple and completely and totally focused on _her_. It made her heart swoop and stutter. 

“Oliver?” She felt a shiver that had nothing to do with the temperature in the cabin run down her spine. 

“What about _these_ feelings?” he asked, his voice a rumble and when she opened her mouth to ask what he meant, his lips came down on hers, obliterating all reason. 


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things heat up at the cabin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, a big THANK YOU to fistis for the art and the-silverforked-sky for the amazing beta work (you guys, she really whipped this into shape... BLESS HER). 
> 
> This chapter can be considered NSFW. If you want to skip that, just go past the first section till you see the ***.

Felicity felt as though her brain was melting underneath the onslaught of sensation that was currently crashing over her. As Oliver’s mouth moved over hers, all thoughts, rational and otherwise, promptly abandoned her. His lips were surprisingly soft on hers, strong and plush and commanding. His arms banded around her, holding her even closer as he urged her to open for him. She clung back to him, her hands gripping him as she surrendered to his embrace.

He licked at her lip, and Felicity reacted instantly, opening for him, drawing her tongue alongside his, deepening the kiss. His woodsy scent surrounded her, intoxicating her and he felt like heaven, his strong arms holding her tight. She wriggled a little on his lap, settling herself, and the movement made Oliver groan into her mouth, his fingertips digging into her back and hip where he held her. 

Felicity really enjoyed that response, wanted more of it so she deliberately rolled her hips against his. She could feel him then, beneath his sweatpants where he was hardening. For her. What a heady rush _that_ was… It felt so good; it was the best thing she’d felt in… well, longer than she’d like to admit. 

She licked into his mouth, her fingernails scratching at the back of his head. She could kiss him like this for the rest of the night, for the rest of her life. It was no surprise that Oliver was an amazing kisser, but the reality of it was more than she could have ever dreamed of. And she had definitely dreamed of it. So many nights, alone in her apartment, with only the image of him climbing the salmon ladder to fill her thoughts… 

Oliver pulled away suddenly, his lips making a popping sound as they left hers. Felicity was breathing hard, her eyes seeking out his and finding him just as flushed and breathless as she was. His blue eyes were dark with desire, which sent a deep thrill through her. 

“Oliver?” she asked, confused why he’d pulled away. 

“I—I don’t know… I’m not—“ he stuttered and she could see the near anguish replacing the heat in his eyes. Her heart lurched. He was still in so much pain, feeling confused. But with that kiss, Felicity now knew _one thing_ that felt right. 

She shushed him and bent to brush kisses along his cheeks, his forehead, his temples, his nose. Each time her lips touched his skin, she felt him relax in her arms even more. 

“I need you,” he told her, his voice choked. “Is this—?”

She drew back again and studied him, realizing what he was asking. He wanted to make sure that she was okay with this step they were taking in their relationship, which just struck her as such a _sweet_ thing to want to be sure of.Felicity smiled, and it felt like the first truly genuine smile she’d had in days. She took off her glasses, carefully folding them and setting them on the table before refocusing on him. “Oh, Oliver. Yes, it’s fine.” She pressed another kiss to his skin, this time at the corner of his mouth. ”I want you.”

Whatever control he’d apparently been clinging too snapped. Oliver crashed his lips to hers and this kiss wasn’t as controlled as the first one had been. This one was all about passion that she felt clear down to the tips of her toes. He moaned and Felicity swore it was the most amazing noise she’d ever heard. Yes, they needed to not be sitting on this chair any longer. 

Oliver seemed to have come to the same conclusion because he pulled away from her, nibbling at her jaw as he worked back to her ear. “Wrap around me, Felicity,” he told her, kissing at her tender earlobe. “Hold onto me tight.” 

Delighted at the call-back to that sexually laden moment they’d shared in the elevator at Merlyn Global, she huffed at that and did as he requested, wrapping one arm around the shoulder that was uninjured and the other underneath, clutching at his back. Oliver stood from the chair and her legs instantly wrapped around his waist, securing her there. He banded his arms around her, one at her back and one underneath one of her thighs and started moving towards the bedroom. He acted as though she weighed next to nothing. Felicity arched up to kiss him again, unable to keep her lips from him now that she’d had a taste. 

Oliver eased her down onto the mattress and then crawled up over her, caging her in with his body and making her blood boil as she watched him.He stopped up at her face, leaning down and kissing her deeply. She melted underneath him, her hands coming up to cup his face and hold him to her. He ran one arm up her side, dipping underneath the edge of her t-shirt and up… up… up. 

Felicity moaned and arched underneath his touch, releasing his lips. She wanted him to touch her so badly, she felt like she was about to burst out of her skin. He attacked her neck, sucking on the spot underneath her ear until she was writhing in earnest. She didn’t think she’d felt so turned on before. 

Which was saying something because this man turned her on all the time. It was a near-constant thing. In the last few months, she’d actually had to develop some mental exercises to train herself to not react to him when he was shirtless and training down in the foundry basement. If she didn’t, she’d never get _any_ work done (and would likely embarrass herself completely). But there was no denying that Oliver, shirt on or off, turned her on. Sometimes all he had to do was smile at her. It was like her body was keyed in to his. And so many nights she’d returned home to her apartment and taken care of her arousal herself, just to take the edge off, all the while envisioning his fingers in place of hers. 

But never, not in a million years, did she ever expect to actually have him over her like this. She’d convinced herself, early on and before she’d even known about his secret, that he would never feel this way about her. But right now, he clearly did feel something for her. Most of all, he wanted her every bit as much as she wanted him. For her, right now, that was more than enough. 

After another moment of kissing, and holy hell could he _kiss_ , she pushed back on him. Oliver looked confused and adorably rumpled as she sat up to pull off her t-shirt.He got the hint pretty quickly and started to shove at his sweatpants and boxers. She kicked off her own jeans and underwear as he tossed his pants to the floor. He unsnapped her bra with deft precision she didn’t want to think too much about and Felicity helped him pull his shirt off over his bandaged shoulder. And then she was pushing him down onto the mattress and climbing over him. 

She bent down to kiss his chest and Oliver reached up to pull her hair tie loose, tossing it onto the night table. He ran his fingers through her golden curls and she learned that she loved his hands in her hair like this. Her tongue traced along some of his scars, his Bratva tattoo, down across one of his nipples, making him hiss at the sensation. She adored the taste of him, how even his _skin_ seemed to come alive under her lips and tongue. 

Felicity moved back up his chest, her breasts brushing lightly against his skin, her nipples pebbling at the light sensation. Oliver lay still, but there was a strained tension to him, as though he was just barely holding himself back. But she didn’t want that. She wanted him to let go with her and give in. 

After a quick moment’s deliberation, Felicity had an idea. Smiling down at him, she got on her knees, positioning herself over his hips. She held herself there, above him, where she knew he could see her. Then, she bit her lip and began to smooth her hands down her body, starting at her breasts, which she pinched lightly before moving down over her ribs, across her waist, flaring out at her hips. 

Oliver’s eyes burned as he watched her. Emboldened by his heated stare, Felicity slowly moved her hands inwards and down, closer and closer to her mound and she knew she was already soaking wet for him. He licked his lips as one of her hands dove down between her thighs and rubbed along her folds. She was so slick already, her fingers slipping as she circled her entrance and then moved back a little to tease at her clit. 

She was so ready for him, so on edge, that one small touch had her moaning and letting her head fall back. Her hair cascaded down her back, brushing against the tops of his thighs. Felicity circled her hips, partly for the show she was giving him and partly to tease at her throbbing clit some more. The coiling ache made her moan even louder. 

Finally, Oliver let go. With a sexy growl, he grabbed her hips and lifted her at the same time as he turned himself. She was on her back with him over her again in an instant and she couldn’t help but be impressed at his raw display of athleticism. 

“Minx,” he grumbled as he nibbled along her jaw. 

She stretched and arched against him. “You have no idea.”

That made his eyes flash; he clearly liked the idea that there was more to her than just the pencil skirts, cardigans and glasses. And she liked that he liked it. 

He brought his hand down in between them to stroke her, test her, feel her. The sensation of his rough digits pressing through her folds was wholly different than how her own fingers felt and it had Felicity whimpering as she spread her legs further, giving him more access. He flicked at her clit, making her yelp, before teasing her entrance. Then, he plunged a finger inside of her, stroking her walls. 

Oliver dropped his head to her shoulder, groaning. “Fucking hell.You are so wet, so soft…”

“More,” she begged. 

“Shit,” he breathed, but a second finger joined the first and he pumped them in and out of herin a rhythm that had her gasping. “You’re so tight…”

She’d seen his cock when they both got undressed and for the briefest of moments, wondered how he might even fit inside of her. But then she realized that of course he would fit, but that fit would be tight and snug and perfect. And suddenly she needed it like oxygen. 

“Please,” she moaned. 

“What?” He breathed on her neck, kissing just below her ear. “What do you need?”

“You,” she told him. “Inside me… please…!”

“Shit…” he muttered again. “Condom?” 

Felicity froze. _Shit_. “I— I didn’t think…” How could she have expected this? She couldn’t!

Oliver drew back and she was puzzled to see a smile on his face. Before she could ask, he was leaning over to open the drawer on the night table. After a moment’s fumbling, he returned with a condom between his fingers, brandished like a prize. 

“Wha—? How?” 

“Tommy always kept this place well stocked. He liked to bring girls here. We both did, on occasion, a long time ago.”

Felicity raised an eyebrow. “And just how old is that condom.”

Oliver checked the expiration date. “We’re good. This puppy still has a few years left in her.”

She blew out a breath she hadn’t known she was holding. “Are there more in that drawer?” she asked. 

His eyes caught hers and then he grinned, a lascivious expression she’d never seen on him before. “Oh yes. Plenty more.”

“Good.” 

Oliver leaned back and Felicity helped him roll the condom down his dick. He was big, bigger than Cooper or anyone else she’d ever been with. She couldn’t wait to feel him pressed inside her, stretching her walls, pounding her into the mattress. 

When it happened, though, it wasn’t what she’d been expecting. Her desperation had been ratcheted up to the point she was ready to throw him up against a wall and ravish him. But as soon as he had the condom in place, Oliver switched tactics. He moved slowly, kissing along her body, turning her taut muscles to jelly once more. 

After she was limp and sweating, he reached down and took ahold of his cock, dragging the tip through her folds a couple times before pressing against her entrance. Felicity tilted her hips slightly, bringing her thighs up to cradle his hips, and he pushed in further. Oliver kept his eyes on hers and he moved slowly as he entered her body. 

Every nerve ending she had felt like it was on fire. He more than stretched her, he _filled_ her. She almost couldn’t breathe; the pressure was so perfect, so exquisite. Oliver’s pupils were blown wide as he kept watching her, gauging her every expression. He cared if he was hurting her, which was amazing to her. 

“You won’t hurt me,” she told him, lifting a hand to cup his cheek. 

“Yes, I can,” he rumbled, dipping his head to kiss her sweetly. His hips pressed against hers as he bottomed out, finally fully sheathed. 

They both remained still for a long moment, holding each other, breathing hard, adjusting to the sensation of being connected on such a visceral physical level for the first time in their relationship. Felicity felt tears gathering at the corners of her eyes. She wasn’t sad, far from it, but she was humbled and awestruck of the beauty of this moment. 

She’d never thought of sex as being particularly beautiful. In fact, when she’d lost her virginity to her high school boyfriend, she thought it was awkward and embarrassing. When she met and fell in love with Cooper, her opinion changed and she saw it as fun and sexy. But beautiful? That was a descriptor that belonged solely in romance novels, not in real life. Sex was sex and it didn’t have to mean anything more than just the moment those two people were occupied with one another. 

Or, at least, that’s what she’d thought until this very moment. Because feeling Oliver fill her this way, feeling his eyes on her face, his lips on her lips… this felt like way more than just sex or some meaningless moment. This felt like _everything._ And it scared her, a little, because she’d gone into this with the assumption that this was just comfort for Oliver, to help him deal with his grief for Laurel and the city. She was afraid that here, in this moment, she was giving him a piece of her heart that she wouldn’t be able to get back the next morning. 

Then, his hips began to move and any worries she had were wiped away by the perfect slide of his cock inside of her. Felicity hung onto him, her nails digging into his back beneath where his bandage was secured. She could hear herself moaning but couldn’t stop it, couldn’t quiet, couldn’t do anything but just feel every damn thing he was doing to her right then and there. 

Her pleasure spiraled up as he moved, so slowly at first but then quicker and harder. Soon she was crying out, begging, babbling, laughing… she didn’t even know. But she was right there, hanging on the cusp of the biggest orgasm she’d ever had during sex for sure, if not the biggest orgasm she’d ever had _period_. 

Soon, she was just chanting his name and she needed something more, she needed to fall over the edge but she couldn’t and it was driving her out of her mind… Oliver seemed to sense what she needed and he reached down again. She felt his fingers feeling around where they were joined and then… he was swirling his index finger around her clit.Her cries changed in pitch, becoming louder and higher. 

“Yes! Yes… yes… Right there! Oliver!” she cried and he sped up his finger as he sped up his hips, slamming into her and flicking her clit and she didn’t just fall over the edge, she went _flying_. 

Her vision sheeted with white and she just hung on to Oliver as he pumped into her a few more times before groaning out his own orgasm. She trembled as her own release pulsed on and on, her cries finally quieting as she clung to him. 

As they both came down from their highs, Felicity knew without a doubt, that _everything_ had just changed and there was no going back.

***

The next morning, everything caught up with Oliver almost the instant he opened his eyes. He got out of bed right away, to keep himself from rolling over towards Felicity, pulling her into his arms, enjoying her sleepy warmth. Doing that would be a mistake. Instead, he took his cargo shorts, some fresh boxers and a fresh t-shirt into the bathroom and took a long, hot shower. 

The shower gave him a lot of time to think about what had happened. He knew exactly where his mind had been the night before. Felicity had offered herself to him, to comfort him, to reassure him, to give him something tangible to hold onto. And it had felt _good_. Better than anything had felt in a long, long time, actually. It wasn’t like he’d been chaste since returning from the island; far from it.Those moments with those women had been exactly what he needed at the time, providing him connection and release and affection and distraction. And when he’d taken Felicity to bed last night, that’s what he was looking for. He was also pretty sure that’s all she was looking for as well. 

But somewhere it’d become more than just comfort. There was something more deeply satisfying about those breathless, amazing and soul-searching kisses than any of the sex he’d had in the last year. Even the night he spent with Laurel. 

Oliver’s heart lurched as he thought about the woman he’d once thought he loved more than any other. On the island, it was the thought of her connection to everything in Starling City, to _home_ , that kept him going through some of his hardest moments. But when he’d returned home, she was different. _He_ was different.They were different, together. He’d thought that maybe, if he could somehow get back with her that it would erase all the damage, all the pain they’d both endured over the last five years. But it hadn’t been that way at all. They’d only generated _more_ pain. 

Tommy. He’d seen them together at Laurel’s place. The hurt on his best friend’s face as he confronted him in Verdant that last afternoon before the world shifted literally beneath their feet… Could he ever make up for that? 

Tommy was his oldest and best friend. Felicity was one of his newest friends. He’d decimated the first relationship, had he done that with the latter as well? 

Wanting Felicity wasn’t a new feeling for him. He’d always found her attractive, from that first day he’d walked into her cubicle with that shot up laptop. But then, when he brought her in on his secret and she was down in the basement with him, assisting him in his mission to save the city, that attraction grew to include genuine admiration. The attraction had exploded as soon as she pushed back on him, challenged him, inspired him… Felicity, in the last few months, had become an enormous part of his life. She occupied quite a few of his thoughts. And he’d be lying if he said that those thoughts had all been strictly platonic in nature. 

When he was at home, trying to sleep at night, trying to shake off the tension of the day, it was her face and her body that came to his mind first. And when he was in the shower, looking for a quick jerk, it was her lips and her ass that ultimately inspired his release. He wasn’t proud of it, but it was the truth. 

He’d done whatever he could over the last few months to avoid those thoughts, to ignore the impulses and feelings and desires. Oliver knew how important it was to respect her place in his life, in his mission. She was worth more than just a late night booty call. But last night, he’d been so weak. He’d given in. 

_Fuck_. 

Oliver turned off the taps and dried off, being extra rough as he scrubbed himself dry. He deserved any discomfort he got. Felicity was a source of light in his dark life and what had he done? He’d abused that. She deserved so much better than _him_. 

He just hoped she’d forgive him for last night, that she’d agree to just forget it ever happened. Or he could… the gears in his mind turned as he dressed. Since he failed to stop to Undertaking, since Laurel died right in front of him, Oliver had thought he needed to leave. He’d brought death and destruction to his home and his loved ones so maybe the best course of action was to… go.

But first… he had to see Felicity.Gritting his jaw, he walked out of the bathroom. Felicity wasn’t in the bedroom, but his eyes were drawn to the rumpled sheets, to where they’d held each other all night long. They _had_ ended up needing more than one condom and Oliver had been amazed at how bold and just downright _sexy_ Felicity was. She hadn’t been shy about sharing her pleasure, about asking for what she wanted and that was just so… 

_Wow._

Regardless what happened, where he went, what he did… those memories would keep him going for a long, long time to come. 

He heard some noise in the kitchen and went out to see what she was doing.Felicity had her back to him, pouring cereal into a bowl.She was wearing a pair of yoga pants and a t-shirt, her hair pulled back again into a ponytail. She looked both small and larger than life all at the same time. 

“Hey,” he said, wincing as she jumped in surprise. 

She turned around and met his eyes for a moment before quickly glancing away. “Hey.” She gestured towards the box of cereal. “Want some?”

“Uh, sure,” he replied. She brought him the bowl she’d just poured and the jug of a milk. The joined him with her own bowl in a minute and they began to eat in silence.Unlike the day before, it felt awkward and unnatural. But Oliver literally did not know what to say. 

“How are you feeling?” Felicity asked at last. 

“Better.Much better. Thank you, by the way, for taking care of me.”

Her cheeks flushed and Oliver felt another surge of guilt. “I was glad to do it,” she replied quietly. 

Oliver felt like dirt. “I think I’m ready to go back today,” he told her. 

She looked up, surprised. “Oh?”

“Yeah. I’m feeling well enough. I should check on Thea.”

Felicity nodded. “Okay. I’ll help you get everything packed up after I take a shower.”

Oliver bit his lip and nodded back. “Okay.”

He expelled the breath he’d been holding when she walked out of the room. That was horrible. Things were clearly going to be worse between them than he’d thought. 

***

Felicity felt like she was keeping tears at bay all day long. From the moment she’d woken up in that bed alone, she’d known that it was because Oliver regretted sleeping with her. Then, when they’d had breakfast together, he’d been so stiff and formal and clearly uncomfortable around her… It made her feel terrible. 

Last night had been amazing, the most amazing night of her life. If that first, soul-shattering time together hadn’t confirmed that for her, the other, more playful, more exploratory times they’d shared during the night certainly had. She’d woken up with the hope that maybe this meant the start of something new for them still burning in her heart. 

But he’d been in the shower and she knew. She just _knew_. Then he sat at that table and just tried to ignore her and it was so painful and awkward. Felicity felt her heart breaking as she sat there, wanting to talk about it, wanting to make _him_ talk about it but not knowing what words to use. And each moment that slipped away was another chance to do something to make this right. 

He wanted to leave and what Felicity heard was that he wanted to be away from _her_. Yes, she agreed he needed to see Thea. But they could have gone together. Or he could call his sister from the landline and tell her he’d be another day. 

Felicity was used to building walls around her heart. She’d begun doing it when she was seven years old and her father had left. He’d been the most important man in her life, sharing with her his love and excitement for computers and technology and then _boom_. Just like that he was _gone_. She never saw him again and the pain from that made her question herself as she was growing up, wondering what it was about her that was so unloveable. She’d hated herself, thinking she’d driven him away. 

Age had given her some much-needed perspective. She realized her father leaving had very little to do with her and she hadn’t been responsible. Still, those walls remained. She let them down a little for Cooper but after he’d gone to prison and then… well, then _he_ was gone too. And that time, Felicity knew she had a good reason to feel responsible. 

Somehow, despite how high and thick and strong she’d built her walls, Oliver had crept over them. He’d found a way in to her heart and now he was blowing holes in her defenses and leaving her bleeding. And she _knew_ she was responsible. Because she’d allowed this. She’d crawled into his lap last night, she’d kissed him, she’d convinced him she was okay with this, that she wanted to sleep with him. She’d really done it to herself and she should _know_ better. 

Felicity packed her things into the duffle with stiff, slow fingers. Her shower had done little to warm up the chill that was snaking through her body. Oliver was out at the Ducati, checking on it. He’d already packed up his leathers and the kitchen and had taken the groceries out to her car for her. He’d been avoiding her and while it still hurt, she was actually glad for it now. The less she had to look at him, the less she had to feel the pain of what she’d caused. 

Sighing, she made sure the last of the medical supplies were packed away and began to lug the duffle out to the Mini. Oliver met her at the porch, startling her. He glanced at her briefly before sliding his eyes away. He grabbed the duffle from her hands. 

“Let me get that for you,” he offered. 

“Thanks,” she mumbled. 

The sun was much higher in the sky now and it was starting to get warm. Felicity wished she could soak that warmth into her skin to take with her back to Starling. She followed Oliver to the car and opened the driver’s side door to get in. 

“You know the way down the mountain?” Oliver asked after he slammed her trunk shut. 

Felicity nodded. “I still have Tommy’s directions.”

“Good, good.” His head bobbed and he was still looking anywhere but at her. He looked like he wanted to say something but was having a hard time getting it out. Felicity leaned on the open door of her car and raised her eyebrows at him. 

“What is it, Oliver?” She hoped, rather dimly but it was still hope, that he might want to talk about what happened with them. 

“I just wanted to tell you that it’s okay if you take the next week off. I won’t be in the foundry and I’m going to tell Dig to take some time too. I imagine QC will be closed too while the board figures out what they’re going to do with the CEO in prison.”

Okay, she had _not_ been expecting that. “What?”

“I won’t be going out on the streets for a while and I imagine the foundry needs some repairs anyhow… so take the week off.”

Felicity blinked. She’d expected that they would fix up the foundry together, as a team. But Oliver didn’t want to do that, at least not yet. Her hopes for being able to at least salvage their working relationship if not their friendship were swirling around the drain. 

“Are you sure?”

“Yep,” he nodded. “Enjoy the time off. I’ll be in touch.”

Somehow, Felicity was starting to doubt that. Feeling the tears prick at the backs of her eyes again, she blinked and reached for her prescription sunglasses behind her visor, replacing her regular glasses with them as cover. _Please, let me get out of here before I totally break down_. 

“Okay, well, then I’ll see you when I see you.” She got into her seat and Oliver rested his hand on the door, leaning down a little. 

“Goodbye, Felicity,” he told her and she looked up, her eyes meeting his through her sunglasses. She could see the anguish in his eyes and she hated it. She did _not_ want to feel sorry for him right now, dammit. The emotions welled up in her chest and she felt that breakdown coming, quick and hard. 

“Goodbye, Oliver.” She started up the car and Oliver closed the door. Without a backwards glance, she took off down the narrow drive, only glancing in the rearview mirror right before the cabin disappeared from view. 

Oliver still stood there, watching her go. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so.... THAT happened.....
> 
> A lot of people were surprised in chapter 2's comments, shocked that the kiss happened (and the way it happened). I want you all to know that this is what the story is about. I'm thrilled to have actually surprised people (honestly, the rating and the tags didn't give it away? the fact that *I* wrote it?) and I expect any number of people might be angry at me for the angst I'm about to put you all through. But you know me. I always make it better eventually. 
> 
> Happy Labor Day weekend, everyone! If I can stay on schedule (and don't get too busy) there should be another chapter on Sunday!


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In the aftermath of the Undertaking, Felicity is anxious to get back to work, both legitimate and illegitimate jobs. But then she gets some startling news that turns her summer on it's end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the AMAZING response from the last chapter! I appreciate each and every comment I received and am truly grateful that so many of you are really loving this story. This update has a bit more angst and some stuff that I know a lot of you have been expecting. But we've also got some great Dig & Felicity in this chapter so I'm sure you guys will like that. Happy Labor Day weekend (to those of you who live where that's a thing) and I'll be back with more on Tuesday! 
> 
> Again, thank you to fistis for providing me fanart and for the-silverforked-sky for her amazing beta work. Seriously, she has the patience of a saint.

A week later, Felicity was cleaning out her freezer. It was a boiling day, unusual for so early in the summer in Starling, and she had a list of chores she wanted to get done around the apartment. Somehow, cleaning out the freezer seemed like the best option, given the heat of the day.

A week had passed since she drove home from that hunting cabin, feeling ashamed and brushed aside and hurt. Most of all, she felt _hurt_. It felt like running home to lick her wounds, which is essentially what she’d done. She’d cried for most of the drive, wiping her eyes to keep them clear, but feeling her heart breaking all the while. 

She hadn’t heard a word from Oliver in that time. Dig called, the day she returned, to ask how she was. She’d brushed him off, saying she was glad to have some vacation time to get things done. One of those things was dealing with the phone calls from her mother, concerned when she saw the news reports about Starling on the news. Another thing was dealing with pesky household chores, hence the freezer cleaning today. Dig hadn’t seem terribly convinced but let her get away with the excuse. But now it’d been seven days and she was tired of this limbo she was hanging in. At least she’d be returning to work at QC tomorrow. That might help keep her mind off of things. 

Felicity picked up a brick of… was this leftovers? She could hardly tell through the thick layer of ice that encased it. Good grief. She’d really let things go around her place in the last few months. She’d been so busy helping out Oliver and Dig that everything in her personal life had taken a back seat. No, not just a back seat. The back _back_ seat. The way back. Like those old station wagons you only ever saw in movies anymore. Wrinkling her nose, she tossed it over her shoulder in the direction of the garbage can she’d set out for exactly this purpose. When the brick went directly in, not even touching the sides, Felicity threw her hands in the air in triumph. 

“Yessss,” she cheered, before turning back to her job. 

A few moments later there was a knock at her door. She debated even answering it since most of her visitors were either solicitors or Mrs. Fernandez looking for her cat (again) or wanting her to turn her music down. Since she didn’t have her music on, however, curiosity had her stepping back and closing the freezer door before padding over to her door on her bare feet. 

Peeking through the peep hole, she was surprised to see that it was John Diggle. She swung the door open, a big smile in place. She’d missed the big guy. “Hey stranger!” she greeted him. 

“Hey, Felicity. Can I come in?” He wore jeans and a polo, a look she wasn’t used to seeing on him. Casual Dig was a new thing for her. 

“Sure, mi casa es su casa,” she said in a terrible Spanish accent. Dig even wrinkled his nose as he stepped past her into her apartment. 

He was looking around her place and she realized it was the first time he’d ever been there. She clasped her hands awkwardly behind her back as she followed him into the living room. He took a seat on her couch, immediately dwarfing it. 

“Can I get you a drink?” 

He fanned himself. “I’d normally say no but it’s sweltering in here. Don’t you have air conditioning?” he asked. 

Felicity shook her head. “Nope. Didn’t come with the building and I haven’t spared the budget or the time to pick up a window unit. It’s usually not so bad, at least this early.”

“Tell me about it,” he grumbled. “An ice water is fine.”

“Ice water, coming right up!”

It’d been a while since she’d had company and Felicity felt a little thrill as she got out a couple of the fancy glasses she’d found at a shop last year and filled them with ice from the freezer. It was her first chance getting to use them, since she wasn’t home much and didn’t know many people to entertain anyhow. Thankfully, the ice hadn’t melted entirely while she’d been cleaning, though she did have to break them apart to fit them into the glasses. She carried them out to the living room and handed one to Dig who immediately a long, grateful drink from his. 

“So what brings you to my humble abode?” Felicity asked, taking a seat in the chair next to the sofa. 

“I just wanted to check on you,” he told her. “See how you were doing. Not used to going days on end without seeing your smiling face.”

Felicity smiled, appreciating the compliment. “I know, it feels weird to be around home so much. I almost don’t know what to do with myself. I was actually _cleaning my freezer_ when you knocked.”

Diggle chuckled. “I feel the same. I drove Carly crazy the other day when she had the day off. She told me I better find another job soon and get out of her hair.”

“You don’t need to go that far,” Felicity said. “This is only a break, right? Oliver said to take a week off, it’s been a week, he probably wants us back at the foundry tomorrow, right?”

“Not exactly,” Dig said slowly. Felicity drew her brows together as she sat forward in her seat. “Actually, that’s part of what I came here to tell you.”

“Dig, what is it?”

“I saw Oliver yesterday, he was on his way to Laurel’s funeral, and he said something.”

Shoot, Laurel’s funeral. Not that Felicity had expected to go but she probably should have been aware of that and at least sent him or Detective Lance some flowers. Tommy too. 

“How was he doing?” she asked, pushing aside her hurt that he’d avoided her all week long. She’d expected him to, right? 

“He looked pretty rough,” Dig admitted. “Probably hasn’t been sleeping much. Or eating. What’s more important is what he said to me.”

“Which was?” Felicity hoped it wasn’t about what happened at that cabin. Not that she thought Oliver _would_ bring it up, but her anxiety was getting the better of her. 

“He told me he wants to hang up the hood. That he’s done with the whole vigilante business.”

Felicity felt like the wind had been knocked out of her. Done? With his mission? With the arrows and the crime fighting and the saving people’s lives and the making the city a better place? Done?? She couldn’t believe what she was hearing. 

“Dig, you must have heard him wrong,” she protested. 

He shook his head sadly. “I didn’t, Felicity. Maybe it was just the funeral weighing him down and that’s all I hope it was. But he looked as certain about it as I’ve ever seen him.”

She sat back in her chair, her mind whirling. She could almost reconcile the demise of their friendship because of one night of (really fantastic) passion, but to give up helping this fledgling team?Felicity didn’t know if she could bear that. Somewhere between taking down the Dodger and swinging across an elevator shaft, being a part of this team had become her own mission. She was helping people, helping her city and the thought of no longer having that felt like a punch to the gut. 

“I don’t understand,” she murmured. 

“Maybe he just needs time, Felicity.”

She wanted to believe that, she really did. But she knew how Oliver could get when he was left to his own devices. No one was half as skilled as Oliver at getting inside their own head. If he had a superpower, it would be brooding. Or guilt. Or guilt about brooding.Or brooding about guilt. 

Dig left not long after he finished his glass of water and Felicity’s mind wandered as she washed and dried the glasses, setting them on the drying rack on her kitchen counter. This team, what they did, was bigger than just Oliver. And it was certainly bigger than what happened between the two of them. She had to try _something_. 

Picking up her phone off the table, she tapped out a quick text to Oliver, holding her breath as she hit send.

 

**FS: Talked to Dig. Said you were done with your project. Not true, is it? Pls text or call me back as soon as you can.**

 

Five hours later, as she was getting ready for bed, there was still no answer.

***

Being back at work helped Felicity’s mood dramatically. When she woke up and saw Oliver had still not replied to her, she felt her hope dwindle significantly. Dig could still be right, he cold just need time. But it wasn’t a good sign. Oliver had never ignored her texts before. 

But this is where work was a godsend because it distracted her from all these thoughts about Oliver and the team… Everyone at QC seemed to be relieved to be back at work, if a little somber. Things were quiet in the break-room when she stopped in to put her sandwich in the refrigerator and pour herself a mug of coffee. 

There was a huge stack of work waiting for her back at her desk, mostly security coding which was a relief. It meant she could spend most of the day at her desk instead of traipsing all around the building, removing porn-site spyware from Executives’ computers. 

The coding was such simple work for her that she could let her mind wander a little as her fingers flew over the keyboard. She thought about Tommy Merlyn, wondering how he was handling things. She’d been watching the news since the Undertaking and knew that Merlyn Global was in upheaval. But Tommy had stepped forward to try to salvage the company. In the press conference from a few days ago, he’d said that thousands of employees didn’t deserve to pay the price for his father’s misdeeds and that he wanted to do whatever it was he could to make things right to the people of the Glades. Felicity had been proud of him, despite not knowing him all that well. He’d looked stressed and tired, but driven to this purpose. She made a mental note to hunt him down and see if she could help. Or at least offer some moral support. 

At around 11am, one of her co-workers stopped by her cubicle. It was Stephanie, who also worked in IT and had been hired about three months after she had. They were casual work friends, sometimes going for drinks after work or having lunch together. 

“Hey, ‘Lis. Wanna go grab some lunch?” she asked. 

Felicity smiled up at the Asian girl. “I’d love to, Steph, but I brought a sandwich today.”

“I did too, but I really feel like I need to get out of here. Everyone is so depressed, it’s really bringing me down.”

Stephanie wasn’t wrong about that. The heatwave had broken overnight with a fantastic thunderstorm (that had kept her awake for several hours, but it was worth it), so the weather wasn’t half bad. Suddenly, getting out of the building and breathing some fresh air sounded like a perfect idea. 

“Okay, gimme a minute to finish up this one section I’m working on,” Felicity said. “Oh, and I’ll need to stop by the ATM.”

Stephanie raised a groomed eyebrow. “ATM? People still use those?”

“Hush. I’d rather not put something else on my credit card this month if I can help it.”

“Just use a debit card!”

Felicity winced. “I left it in my other purse. Taking a week off work messed with my rhythm.”

Stephanie just laughed. “I know, I feel you. Okay, I know a good ATM with low fees around the corner from the deli I want to go to.”

“You’re the best,” Felicity said with a grin. 

“I know,” Stephanie chirped. 

It took her only a few minutes to finish up the section she was working on, power down her computer and grab her purse. Stephanie talked her ear off about this new guy she was dating the whole elevator ride down to the lobby. Felicity was used to this (Stephanie seemed to be dating someone new every time they went for lunch together) and nodded along. Mostly, she was glad Stephanie hadn’t asked her yet if she was seeing anyone new. God knows what she’d say to that. 

The ATM wasn’t too far away from QC, which was a good thing. Even though the weather was a lot more reasonable today, it was still warm and Felicity was feeling the heat by the time Stephanie got her there. Her co-worker hung back while Felicity approached the machine, digging her ATM card out of her wallet. She’d nearly forgotten her PIN, it’d been so long since she’d used an ATM. 

She requested a reasonable amount of cash and then hit the OK button. The machine spat the bills at her which she gathered up and tucked into her wallet. Then, it spit out her receipt. Felicity glanced at the slip of paper as she walked back to where Stephanie was waiting for her and her steps faltered as she read her available balance.

 

**AVAIL BAL: $1,005,324.06**

 

She blinked and looked at it again. Yes, that was another comma in there. A comma she wasn’t expecting _at all_. Her breath left her body as she crammed the receipt into her purse and dug out her phone. 

Stephanie joined her. “Something wrong? Did they fuck up? Cuz these banks are _always_ fucking up.”

“I think maybe they did,” she whispered as she pulled up her bank app on her phone. It had to be a mistake. There was no way she had one million dollars in her bank account. Just… no way. 

Stephanie continued chattering as they walked down the sidewalk towards the deli and Felicity logged into her account, just to check. Even though she was _sure_ it was a mistake. But there, on the screen and plain as day, was her balance: $1,005,324.06.

“Holy shit,” she muttered. She only knew one person with that much money. Well, two people really. But only one person could reasonably be aware of her bank account number. “I’m going to kill him.”

“Kill who?” Stephanie asked, looking at her curiously. 

She looked to her co-worker, her brain racing for an excuse. “Oh! Just…” _Don’t say ‘Oliver Queen’, don’t say ‘Oliver Queen’…_ “Someone that drives me up every single wall there is.”

“Oh!” Stephanie said, her tone very knowing. She winked at Felicity. “He sounds hot.”

***

It was agony waiting for the work day to come to an end. Felicity burned through the rest of the coding work she’d had on her desk, anxious to finish up on time so she could leave at the bell-toll of 5pm. As soon as she was free, she rushed to the parking garage and her car, speeding as quickly as she could through the post-workday downtown traffic towards the Glades and the foundry. 

She didn’t _know_ if she’d find something there, but she thought it was as likely as anything else. And maybe, if she was really lucky, she’d find Oliver there. If what Dig said was true and if Oliver had been the one to put that money in her account (and let’s be honest, he totally was), then there was a chance he’d stop by to pack up his old trunk and grab some things. 

She only hoped she wasn’t too late. 

Felicity parked behind the club and rushed to the alley entrance. Verdant was still closed, needing some repairs to the structural integrity before it could open and while Felicity was sure she could find her way inside regardless, she didn’t feel like dealing with it just then. It was just as easy to take the side entrance and avoid any questions if Tommy was around. 

Felicity enjoyed Tommy and she wanted to meet up with him soon, but right now, she was on a mission. Her heart fell when she stepped inside and found the foundry dark. She switched on the lights but only the emergency backup lights came on. The overheads must have been damaged in the quake. She made a mental note to have that fixed first before she reminded herself; it might be a moot point. 

It was clear as she looked around that Oliver wasn’t there. But she could see signs that he had been there. The trunk she’d pillaged just over a week ago for herbs was gone. Her chair, which had fallen over on its side in the chaos was sitting up again. Felicity walked over to it and that’s when she saw a folded piece of paper leaning against one of her workstations. Her heart in her throat, she reached out and picked it up. 

Her fingers were shaking as she opened it up and immediately, she recognized Oliver’s neat scrawl. It was addressed to her, as she’d already expected. Tears burned as she read the words.

 

_Dear Felicity,_

_I wanted to thank you. When I came to you for help back in October, I didn’t give you much choice, just some shitty lies that you saw right through. But you helped me anyhow. In February, I didn’t give you a choice again when I showed up, bleeding in the backseat of your car. You even told me, in that singular way of yours, that you would not be joining the team._

_You scared me when you said that, by the way. I didn’t even realize until that moment just how much I wanted you to join us. We needed you, Dig and I both. The two of us were spinning our wheels without you and when you came along, everything finally fit into place. I’m so glad you decided to stay. I have no idea what changed your mind but I’m thankful every day that you did. Even if that means I’m a selfish man for keeping you here in this dangerous life._

_I’m trying to fix that now, leaving so that the darkness and danger that follows me wherever I go doesn’t touch anyone else I care about. But I wanted you to know that I was thankful for all you’ve done and that I couldn’t have done it, couldn’t have lived through it, if not for you._

_I’m guessing you’ve noticed my gift right now. Consider it severance pay wrapped in a big thank you for everything you’ve done. You deserve so much more than this. Use it well (I know you will) and, if you can, try to think of me well and remember that I tried my best._

_Your friend,_

_Oliver_

 

Felicity blinked back tears as she folded the paper back up and sank into her chair. Then, the tears came. There was no holding them back and she had done pretty good at doing so for the last seven days, since that tearful journey back to Starling. 

He was really just quitting. And, from the sound of his letter, even leaving Starling. He’d given her the most incredible night of her life and he felt… he’d wronged her in doing so? Now, he wasn’t even here for her to argue with him. If he was standing right here, right now, she’d grab him and shake him and tell him that he was special. 

Because that’s what Oliver Queen was to her. He was a _good man_ who was so much more than anyone else believed him to be. Before the Gambit sank, he was a drifting young man without a compass, lost without a purpose. The island, as awful as it had likely been for him, had given him that purpose and honed him down to the traits that really mattered. 

But the worst part was that he didn’t even _see_ it. Oliver never saw the good he did and that broke Felicity’s heart. Why hadn’t she told him? She should have told him every day that he was doing something important, that he mattered. She should have told him what she told Detective Lance in that interview room, that he was a _hero_. 

And, when she’d had him in her arms, she should have told him that she was falling in love with him. No, that wasn’t quite right. She was absolutely, 100%, totally and irrevocably in love with him. She couldn’t lie to herself anymore, not after that night. Not after _everything_. 

As the tears fell down her cheeks unchecked, Felicity realized she’d probably never get the chance to tell him that. 

It was over. 

***

After she dried her tears, Felicity headed towards Dig’s apartment. She literally didn’t know where else to go and Dig’s face was the first one, after Oliver’s, that came to her mind. As she drove over there, it occurred to her that Dig might have received a similar deposit today. Why hadn’t she thought to call him right away? Her head had been all over the place all day long with that crazy deposit. 

Luckily, the elevator in Dig’s building had been fixed so she didn’t have to climb up six flights like the last time she’d gone to his place. Even so, she was out of breath when she knocked on his door. 

When Dig opened the door, he looked like he was expecting her. He didn’t even greet her, just stood back and waved his arm aside. 

“Thanks,” she wheezed, stepping past him. 

“Can I get you a beer?” he asked her, a small smirk on his lips. 

“You got any wine?” 

“Yes, I do.”

“Ahh, so you _were_ expecting me,” she said as she plopped down onto his sofa. “I’ll take a glass of red.”

Dig just chuckled and walked into the kitchen. 

“Were you expecting me?” she called to him after a long moment. 

“Yes, Felicity, I was,” he answered. “Soon as I got the note this morning and checked my account, I knew you’d be calling me or something.”

“And here I thought I was mysterious,” she muttered to herself. 

“To be honest, I thought I’d heard from you a lot sooner than this,” he said loudly. She could hear glasses clink in the kitchen as Dig poured her wine and got his beer from the refrigerator. 

“I wasn’t really thinking very clearly,” she admitted. 

“What was that?” Dig asked, appearing back in the living room, carrying her wineglass and a bottle of beer. 

She took the wine from him with a smile. “I said that I wasn’t really thinking very clearly. I didn’t notice the deposit until I went to draw out some money for lunch earlier today. I immediately expected it was from Oliver, I mean, who else, right? But I had to get back to work and my brain was just… all over the place.”

Dig looked at her speculatively as he took a long pull from his beer. Felicity suddenly wondered what he knew. Had Oliver told him about what happened at the cabin. She tried to hide her nerves by taking a sip from her wine. 

“Yeah, well. It’s something else, right?” Dig said, leaning back and keeping his eyes on her. 

“It’s such an _Oliver_ thing to do,” Felicity agreed. “How did you find out?”

“When I woke up this morning, there was a note shoved under my door. It mentioned the ‘gift’ which had me logging into my bank account.” Dig shook his head, looking both amused and exasperated. “That man. If he’d been right there I would have throttled him.”

“Do you think he’s left too?” Felicity asked, realizing belatedly how small her voice sounded. She cleared her throat and took another sip of wine. 

“Oh yeah. I mean, I checked in with Thea to be sure but soon as I read that note, I knew he was gone.” 

Felicity wondered if his note said the same things hers had. “What did Thea say?”

“She said Oliver told her he was going to Europe to go skiing.”

“…What?”

“I know. That was my reaction too. She didn’t have any information, said Oliver told her he’d be in touch when he got there.”

“Clearly it’s a lie. Oliver, skiing in Europe?”

“Not just that, but its summer,” Dig pointed out. 

“I think the Alps have snow year round, but I’m not sure. But snow skiing, water skiing… just, no. He’s not in Europe. He’s not skiing.”

“We can definitely agree on that,” Dig said. “So where do you think he is?”

Felicity thought but she honestly couldn’t picture Oliver anywhere but here in Starling, where he belonged. “Probably somewhere terrible where he can self-flagellate himself as much as possible,” she muttered. 

Dig burst out laughing. “I shouldn’t laugh,” he said. “But god, you’re probably right.”

“Russia? Maybe?” she guessed. 

“That’s as good a guess as any. I mean, he got that Bratva tattoo somehow, he probably has contacts there.”

Felicity nodded. “Should we find him?”

Dig took another drink and then scratched at his jaw. “I don’t know. I talked to him, I told you, before Laurel’s funeral. He looked terrible and I think maybe he just needs some time.”

Her heart sunk a little. But she knew that Dig was right. “Okay.I just… worry about him.”

“I know you do. That’s something you two have in common,” Dig said. 

She cocked her head at him. “What do you mean?”

“Oliver asked me in his letter to keep an eye on you. And it wasn’t just ‘watch out for Felicity’, it was… weighted. I can read between the lines and I saw more than just brotherly concern for you in that letter, Felicity.”

“Oh…” Her voice was back to sounding small in her own ears again. 

“Something happened, Felicity. Between the Undertaking and Laurel’s funeral, something happened with you two and I’m willing to bet it’s whatever happened up at that cabin.”

“Dig,” she began, but she caught herself. She literally didn’t know what to say to him. The last thing she wanted was to see judgement in his eyes, to feel his disappointment in her. And she knew he’d be disappointed. 

“Can you tell me what happened?” he asked and his voice was calm. Felicity looked up to see him watching her, concerned. 

“Dig, I—I can’t.”

“Felicity, something is bothering you. And it’s clearly bothering him too.”

A horrible thought suddenly occurred to her. “Wait, you don’t think he left because of… me?Do you?” What if he did? What if Oliver left Starling and his sister and his mother and everything just because she’d slept with him? 

“No, Felicity. I don’t. I think whatever drove him to leave Starling had to do with the Undertaking.”

Felicity heard what Dig didn’t say. It also had to do with Laurel. She had no right to feel as uneasy by that revelation as she did. Laurel was one of his oldest friends and he’d been in love with her. He was probably _still_ in love with her. And she’d died, horribly. Oliver’s guilt about not being able to stop the Undertaking had to be linked to his guilt over Laurel’s death. When she really thought about how deep his feelings for Laurel went, her decision to sleep with him at the cabin seemed even more tawdry and small. 

She blinked back tears and took a long drink from her wineglass. She’d only wanted to help him. He’d been so sad and so hopeless and she just… hadn’t thought. She’d used her body to soothe him and now he probably hated her. Or worse, he pitied her. He asked Dig to watch over her? Humiliation burned in her chest. 

“Felicity?” 

She gave Dig a shaky smile. “It’s fine. I’m just sad that he felt he had to leave town.”

“I don’t doubt that you are, but I know something else is going on here. I just wish you would tell me what it is.”

“Dig…”

“Felicity, I’m your friend. Or at least I’d like to think I’ve become your friend.”

“Of course we’re friends, Dig.” 

“We’ve been through a lot over the last few months and spent a lot of time together and I care about you,” he went on. “But I can’t help you, as a friend, if I don’t know what’s going on.”

Her heart felt like it was cracking open and bleeding. It’d been too long since she’d had any really good friends in her life and Dig’s friendship meant the world to her. “Dig… I can’t right now. I want to, but I just _can’t_. I’m sorry.”

“Felicity, it’s okay.I’m just worried about you.”

“I’ll tell you, eventually. I promise I will. I just need to get my feet underneath me. This last week or so has been absolutely insane.”

“I can definitely agree with that.”

“And I just need some time to get the ground solid again.Does that makes sense?”

“It makes perfect sense.” Dig smiled at her. “You’re one of the the strongest woman I know, Felicity.”

She felt her cheeks heating up. “I don’t feel very strong.”

“You said it yourself.It’s been insane time around here lately. No one can blame you for being a little off-kilter as a result, much less me. Shoot, at least you’re sticking around, going to work, dealing with the aftermath. You didn’t run off to parts unknown and drop obscene amounts of cash in your friends’ bank accounts before you went.”

Felicity laughed. “You have a point there.”

“I’ll be here, when you’re ready to talk,” he promised. 

“Thanks Dig. I really do appreciate it.”

“Now… what are you going to do with that money? Because that’s a pretty big shopping spree waiting to happen, right?” he asked, deftly changing the subject. 

Felicity blew out a relieved a breath. She smiled as she took another sip of wine. “Actually, I had some ideas about the foundry…”

Dig looked interested as he leaned forward.“Oh?Do tell.”

Felicity started sharing some of the thoughts she’d had all afternoon, relaxing even further when she saw Dig’s eyes light up as he listened. They would be alright here, without Oliver. She just hoped, given the time he needed, that he’d return to where he belonged. 


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Felicity works on fixing up the foundry and gets closer with Tommy at the same time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope everyone had a lovely weekend! Here is chapter 5... Oliver is still MIA but never fear, you'll feel his presence in this chapter. We get some good "Flommy" and "Thelicity" this chapter too, in case you're interested in those friendship moments. Don't you wish we could have had this on the show? 
> 
> Amazing artwork by fistis. Beta work by the tireless the-silverforked-sky.

The end of August was hot and sticky in Starling City. Felicity had given up nearly two months before and bought a couple of air conditioner units to install in her windows so she wouldn’t melt when she was home at her apartment. Dig and Tommy both installed them for her and she rewarded them with beer and pizza.

Despite growing up in Las Vegas, Felicity wasn’t a big fan of the heat. More than that, however, she wasn’t a fan of damp heat like Starling got. Vegas had always had that dry thing going on, which actually was far easier to tolerate than the humid mugginess she was suffering right now. Tommy explained patiently to her that it was because of Starling’s proximity to the water, plus the fact their region got more rainfall than Vegas did. 

Whatever the reasons, she was miserable whenever she had to leave work, her air conditioned car or her home. Tommy made fun of her constantly, even though he was sweating just as hard as she was. 

“You are going to get the AC working in here soon right?” she asked him one day, wiping her sweaty brow with the back of her grimy hand.They were at the foundry, working on repairs. Tommy and Thea were fixing up Verdant, planning to reopen as soon as everything passed inspection and Felicity was repairing the basement lair, with a few upgrades she’d planned when Oliver had put that money in her account. Thea worked while Tommy was busy at Merlyn Global and he came in to relieve her in the evenings, which is when Felicity came over from QC to work on her own renovations. 

“Yes, yes. I need to wait for the HVAC guy to have an opening in his schedule though. The whole city is desperate for air conditioning and he’s busy as hell,” Tommy explained. 

Felicity whined but went back to what she was doing, which was crouching on the hard cement floor and bundling the wires from the network and computers and other electrical outlets together before sinking them beneath the floor to keep everything neat and organized. Tommy was taking a break from overseeing the construction upstairs to give her a hand and generally pester her. 

The two of them had become friends over the last several months. At first, Tommy had been closed off and reticent. He hadn’t wanted to talk to her or anyone else. He’d been throwing himself into his work at Merlyn Global and plans for helping out the Glades victims. Which was great and all, but it didn’t leave him much time for himself. 

Felicity, however, was very good at getting broody billionaires to open up. It helped that Tommy was normally a very open and outgoing guy and shutting himself away was a little unnatural for him. It’d only taken a few unexpected drop-ins with pizza or takeout to work her way into his life. 

He didn’t talk much about the Undertaking or Laurel or Oliver or his father, but Felicity knew those were sore subjects for him and didn’t want to press him further than he was comfortable with. She knew that if she made a point to be there for him as a friend, he would open up to her when he was ready. If he was ever ready. 

There was still no word from Oliver. He dropped the occasional post card to Thea, which Felicity heard about either through Dig, who still technically worked as security for the Queen family or through Thea herself when she was at Verdant helping with the reconstruction. In Oliver’s absence, she’d decided to fill his role as co-owner of the joint and took that responsibility pretty seriously. 

Tommy had protested at first, telling her she was too young to be managing a bar. Thea had pointed out that she was too young to serve alcohol, but not too young to sell it. Felicity had backed up the younger Queen, admitting that she had a good point, which Thea had appreciated. The two of them had grown a bit closer too, over the summer months. Though, admittedly, most of Thea’s free time was spent with Roy Harper, her boyfriend, who’d been conveniently hired on as a stock boy at the club. 

“Can you hand me that fresh pack of zip-ties?” Felicity asked. 

“Sure…” Tommy said. There were some scuffling noises and then, a moment later, “Where?”

“On that table right there. Small plastic package.” She waved a hand in the general direction she was referring to.

“Ahh.” He brought it over to her, dropping the package into her waiting hand. “See, I can be helpful.”

“If you wanna be more helpful, you can get working on that glass case there. It needs to be assembled and I’m not sure I can handle the glass panes on my own and Dig can’t come by till later this week.”

“What the heck do you need a giant glass case for?” Tommy asked, inspecting the box that contained the pieces. 

“I want to display Oliver’s suit in it.”

Tommy turned to her with a raised eyebrow. “Display his _suit_?”

She nodded, keeping her eyes on the wires in front of her. “On a mannequin. Don’t worry, I can put that together myself.”

Tommy just snorted softly. Felicity knew he still didn’t quite agree with her about Oliver being a hero. He was hurt still… Oliver kept this huge secret from him with no intention to ever tell him. And while Felicity knew that there was no love lost between Tommy and Malcolm, Oliver did kill his father and that had to have some sort of impact on their relationship. The two men needed to _talk_ , but it was kind of hard to get that done with Oliver off god-knows-where. 

“You’re uncharacteristically quiet tonight,” she remarked, hoping that maybe now she could get Tommy to open up. At least a little. She’d been trying, gently in her opinion, for weeks now with very little luck.

“Tired,” he admitted. “It’s been a long week and the board at Merlyn Global is giving me a lot of grief. They’re not particularly keen on my plan to liquidate half of our assets and start a charity foundation to provide aid to the Glades.” 

This was the first she was hearing about it. “Really, Tommy?That’s amazing!”

“I’m glad _you_ think so… the board, as I said, isn’t too fond of it. They’re trying to have me declared incompetent.”

Felicity winced and sat back on her heels after securing the last zip-tie. “You’re more than competent, Tommy. I’ve seen your records from Starling City University. You were at the top of your class in your MBA program.” 

“Yeah, tell that to them.” He looked disgruntled.

“Maybe I will.”

Tommy grinned at her and stuck out a hand to help her to her feet. “If only I could steal you away from the QC dungeons,” he said. 

Felicity grinned back. For the last month, Tommy had been low key pestering her to leave Queen Consolidated and go to work for him at Merlyn Global. She kept putting him off, but the man was nothing if not persistent.An admirable trait for an oft-embattled young CEO, she thought.

“How many times do I have to tell you I’m happy in those dungeons?” she asked him good-naturedly. 

“I just don’t understand _how_. Felicity, you should be running that department. Or, better yet, running the company. They’ve got you chained to that cubicle doing drone work. It’s a waste!”

He wasn’t saying anything she hadn’t thought herself so many times over the last several years.She’d taken the job, straight out of MIT, because she liked the company and saw a lot of opportunity for subtle advancement. After everything that went down with the FBI and Cooper, it felt safer. But, unfortunately, it turned out her department head was a braindead asshole and she’d been stuck in one, boring place all this time. Maybe taking a job with Merlyn Global was the best plan for her right now but part of her still felt loyal to Queen Consolidated. Almost as though, in Oliver’s absence, she had to hold the fort. It was a silly notion and she knew it, but she just wasn’t ready to turn her back on QC. Not yet, anyhow.

“I love your faith in me, Tommy. It’s the ego boost I need right now. I’ll definitely let you know if I get tired of waiting around for a promotion at QC.” 

“Are you sure it’s just a promotion you’re waiting around for?” he asked her, raising a suggestive eyebrow. She felt her cheeks heating. 

“What do you mean?” She knew _exactly_ what he meant.

Tommy sighed and checked his watch. “C’mon, the workers will have left for the night by now and I need a drink. So do you.”

Felicity nodded her agreement and followed him up into the club. Things were coming along very well up there and it almost looked as though the place was ready to reopen. All except for the air conditioning, of course. A nightclub in the middle of summer without AC was probably not a good idea.But as soon as that was handled, it looked like Verdant would be back in business. 

She and Tommy had a routine now, after all these weeks of friendship. When they needed a break from lair or club renovations, they’d meet up here and have drinks together. Tommy had already memorized her favorite non-wine drink, which was a gin and tonic. He made it just the way she liked it, with the perfect amount of lime juice and just enough gin so that she really felt a nice buzz. Plus, he gave her the good stuff, which she appreciated.

Felicity perched on a barstool while Tommy fixed her drink. 

“So… about what I said downstairs…”

“What did you say?” Felicity feigned innocence. She wasn’t about to make this easy for him.

“You know what I said. I implied that it wasn’t just a promotion that had you waiting at QC.”

“I can’t imagine what you’re talking about. What else would I be waiting for?” 

“My co-called best friend,” he replied, an edge to his voice. 

“Excuse me?” _Oh, shit_. 

Tommy gave her a dry smirk. “Do you remember what we talked about the night of the Undertaking? When we both drank whiskey shots and laid our hearts out on the table? I know you’ve got it bad for him,” he said, shrugging as though this was a well known fact already.

Felicity groaned and let her head fall forward onto her arms which rested on the bar. “Don’t remind me,” she mumbled. She’d revealed far too much to this man that night.

“You still haven’t told me what happened when you found him at the cabin,” Tommy reminded her, passing the gin and tonic across to her. 

She lifted her head and took a sip. “And you still haven’t talked to me about how you’re feeling about Laurel and Oliver and your dad and all that.”

“Hmm… touché.” Tommy fixed himself his own favorite drink, an old-fashioned and she enjoyed watching him meticulously put it together. 

“Tell you what,” he said as he worked. “I’ll talk about what’s eating me if you talk about what’s eating you.”

“Deal.” She wanted Tommy to open up badly enough to agree to it. “You first, though.”

He sighed as he joined her on the barstool next to hers and took a sip of his own drink. “I’m mostly over being angry,” he told her. “It’s still there a little, mostly towards my dad. I guess having to spend my days cleaning up his mess would do that, thought. But Oliver… I don’t know. I think, mostly, I just miss him.”

Felicity put a hand on his arm and gave it a little squeeze. “I miss him too. “

“As for Laurel… I think I’ve finally realized something about our relationship. I spent so much of those last few months blaming Oliver for coming in between us, but the fact was… it was always going to be Oliver for her. You know? I know she loved me in her own way, but it was nothing like what she felt for Oliver. And it never was going to be either. It wasn’t anything I did, specifically, it’s just her heart was with Oliver.”

He looked so sad, her heart went out to him. “Oh, Tommy.”

“I wanted to be mad with her about it, but I can’t even do that. Because I did love her. And now she’s gone. I didn’t even get to tell her, one last time, that I loved her. Just so she could know it before she…” He stopped and took a long drink. Felicity mirrored him, taking a drink from her own glass. 

“Have you thought about going on any dates?” she asked gently. 

“I know I _should_ , I just don’t know if I’m ready yet. But I will be. It’d help if I didn’t keep falling for women who are into my best friend though.”

She had her drink halfway to her lips when what he said finally registered with her. “Tommy?”

He waved a hand in the air as if shooing a fly. “It’s okay, Felicity. You don’t need to worry about it. It’s just a low-level crush and I’ll get over it. It’s just… you’ve been so great the last few months. You’ve really helped me pull me up and you have no idea how grateful I am for that.”

“I’m happy to do it,” she told him earnestly. “I really do value our friendship and I think you’re a great guy.”

His cheeks turned pink, which was probably the first time she’d ever seen Tommy Merlyn blush. “If Oliver isn’t in love you, then he’s an enormous fool.”

Now it was her turn to blush. “Tommy…”

“And I know that man very well. Or at least I used to. And he was a fool about a great many things but falling in love with a beautiful, intelligent girl was not one of them.”

Felicity cleared her throat, uncomfortable with the subject. It wasn’t that she didn’t believe Tommy… well, no. That was exactly it. She didn’t believe him. “If I had any sense, I’d fall for you instead, Tommy.”

He regarded her for a long moment, a lazy smile spreading across his handsome face. “I don’t know where Oliver is, but if he comes back and doesn’t make a play for you, I just might.”

Felicity raised an eyebrow. “And if he doesn’t come back?”

“Then I will _definitely_ make a play for you.” He winked and she laughed, feeling the tension melt away. Tommy was a good guy and he deserved some good things in his life. She wasn’t joking when she said she should have fallen for him instead. But, in lieu of that, she would be grateful that they were good friends. She could always use more of those in her life. 

***

Another month passed without any word from Oliver. Verdant opened the week after Tommy had that maybe he could have feelings for her. The HVAC guy finally showed up and ended their airless, sweaty misery. The grand opening was a huge affair, with a line around the block and plenty of media coverage. Tommy and Thea were in their element and Felicity was able to talk Dig into coming out with her for the big event. 

He looked glad for it, actually and Felicity was curious at his reaction when she suggested he bring Carly along. Maybe they’d had a fight. She chose not to push it. The opening was fun, regardless and they all had needed the distraction from everything. Felicity drank far too much and danced even more and poor Dig had to drive her home and send her to bed. She’d apologized the next day, but he assured her that it was his duty to watch out for her, and not just because Oliver had asked him to. 

Felicity thanked her stars every day for a friend like John Diggle. 

One thing that wasn’t going so well was her job. Things at Queen Consolidated were worse than ever. The bad press in the wake of the Undertaking didn’t fade with time, especially not with the media focus on Moira Queen’s impending trial. The Queens were in the news every day, and not for anything good as the papers and news programs constantly rehashed the events surrounding the devastating Undertaking. Without any firm leadership in place, QC was left vulnerable and prime for a hostile takeover. 

Stellmoor International, a shark of a company out of San Francisco, was scenting the waters. And, just yesterday, had taken their first nibble. They were notorious for devouring companies when they were vulnerable, tearing them to pieces and leaving thousands unemployed and local economies in ruins. Fears were running high that QC would be gobbled up and more than 30,000 employees would lose their jobs. Catastrophic not just for QC, but for the city at large, which was still bleeding, even months later, from the Undertaking. 

Part of the problem was there was no one really _in charge_ at QC. The board was running things, looking for a replacement CEO but with all the bad press and now Stellmoor sniffing around the doors, no one wanted the job. Felicity had heard more than one person in the break room or the elevators remarking that Oliver Queen should return, take his rightful place as CEO, and save the company. 

Felicity was starting to agree. 

She also knew that Oliver would hate to see his family’s company dismantled like that. He might not have cared much about the running of it after returning from the island, but then it had been in the safe and capable hands of Walter and then Moira. This company was his family’s legacy and Felicity knew just how important his father and his family were to Oliver. He’d want to save QC, if just for his father’s memory and for the family name. 

And maybe he’d want to save it for all the employees and the rest of the city too. 

The more Felicity thought about it, the more she thought Oliver would absolutely return if he knew. The problem was she didn’t know where to find him. The renovations in the lair were almost complete but she still needed to do some work on the network before she could run any searches undetected. It wouldn’t do to start running facial recognition and ping on the FBI’s radar. Or worse: ARGUS. No, she needed to make sure everything was secure and locked down before she could really search in earnest for Oliver. That was going to take a few more days of work, at least, since she only had her evenings free to be down at the foundry. 

It occurred to her, as she was packing up her things at the end of the day and getting ready to walk out to her car, that maybe Thea could help. She was a Queen, after all, and while Felicity knew she was busy with Verdant and unlikely to be interested in dealing with QC, it was a worth a shot. 

Her mind made up, Felicity decided to stop in at the club before heading down to the basement and see if she couldn’t talk to Thea about this. 

***

It was still an hour or two before the club was opening so Felicity was able to just walk right in. She found Tommy right away, taking inventory behind the bar. 

“Expecting a big night?” she asked, leaning against the bar. 

He looked up and grinned when he saw it was her. 

“Well, if it’s not my favorite blonde tech guru,” he drawled. “Nah, not especially, just want to make sure we have all the likely suspects in stock.”

“How’s things at Merlyn Global?” she asked, already dreading the answer. The board still hadn’t let up on the poor guy much, but he was making some headway. 

“Don’t ask,” he muttered. Then, he shrugged. “It’s not as bad as it was. I shouldn’t be so impatient. I just wish they’d realize how important this is to me and to the city. Shouldn’t they _want_ to improve things for the victims?”

“You would think,” she agreed. She knew from some of Oliver’s rantings how frustrating it could be to get the wealthy to look and empathize outside their own narrow sphere. 

“Anyhow, what can I do for you, beautiful? In here for one of my sublime gin and tonics? Or is it more work down in the basement for you instead?Both?”

Felicity grinned. “Actually, I’m looking for Thea,” she said. 

“You’re in luck, she’s up in the office, filling out some purchase orders.Go on up.”

“Thanks, Tommy. You’re the best.”

“Yeah, yeah. That’s what they all say. Come back down for a G&T when you’re done.”

“Wouldn’t miss it,” she replied with a wink. 

Felicity climbed up the employee access stairs to the second level. The office was on the righthand side and she knocked on the door briskly. There was no answer. She knocked again. 

“Thea? It’s Felicity.” 

She opened the door and stepped in and immediately brought her hand up to shield her eyes. Thea was there, but so was Roy and they were on the desk and… oh god. 

“I’m so sorry,” she said, keeping her hand. “I didn’t know you— Roy, I didn’t know you— I’m just…” She hooked a thumb over her shoulder. 

Then she turned and walked out as fast as she could, closing the door behind her. Shit! She was never going to get that image out of her mind, was she? 

A moment later, the door was pulled open and Roy walked out. He was red as a beet and Felicity could easily detect a hickey on his neck. “Blondie,” he muttered in greeting before heading down the stairs. 

“Felicity, you can come in,” Thea called out to her. 

Wincing, Felicity stepped back into the office. “Thea, I’m so, so sorry. I didn’t even think you’d have Roy in here and that you’d be doing _that_ and just…”

Thea held up a hand. “Felicity, relax.It’s okay. Roy and I get carried away all the time.” She shrugged and grinned, tossing her long brown hair over her shoulder. “What can I say? We’re young and horny.”

Felicity swallowed a snort. “I do not need to know that,” she muttered. 

Thea, thankfully, took pity on her. “So what’s up, ‘Lis? Network troubles in the club again?”

Felicity shook her head. “Actually, I wanted to talk to you about Queen Consolidated.”

The young woman seemed to visibly deflate. “I don’t have anything to do with QC.”

“I know that but… at the same time, it’s got your name on it. It’s the family business, your father’s company. You do have some investment, don’t you?”

“A little, I guess. I’ve always just left that to my mom and Walter.”

“But Walter is gone and your mother…” Thea looked away and Felicity swallowed before continuing, “…is in prison. Combined with all the bad press lately and the crisis in the city, QC is very vulnerable right now.”

“What are you saying?” Thea asked, looking concerned at last. 

“Here, let’s sit down,” Felicity suggested, gesturing at the sofa. 

Thea sat down and Felicity sat next to her. She clasped her hands in her lap, rubbing her thumbs over her knuckles nervously. 

“There’s a company called Stellmoor International. I’m not sure if you’ve heard of them.”

“No, I haven’t.”

“It’s based out of San Francisco and their business is acquiring and dismantling other businesses. They tear them apart and sell the pieces, making a handsome profit.”

Thea’s eyes lit up. “Wait, is this like ‘Pretty Woman’?”

Felicity shook her head, confused. “What?”

“In ‘Pretty Woman’, Richard Gere was the president of a company that bought businesses in trouble and sold off the parts and he ended up having an attack of conscience because he fell in love with a prostitute. So instead of destroying the old man’s shipyard, he invested in it. Or something like that. I got distracted when Richard Gere kissed Julia Roberts on the fire escape.”

Felicity blinked and thought back to the last time she saw that movie. It’d been a few years but… yeah, the comparison was there. “Yes, that’s pretty much the same thing. Except no attack of conscience this time. And no hookers.” That she knew of, at least. 

“And the company in trouble is… Queen Consolidated?” Thea asked. 

She nodded. “Yes. With Walter and your mom gone, there’s no one at the helm. The board is keeping things going but there’s been so much bad press lately and the stock prices have taken a nosedive.”

“And… what can I do to help? I mean, I’m just 18 years old, Felicity.”

“You are co-owner of a club,” Felicity pointed out. 

“Yeah, but that’s a _club_. QC is a multinational….whateveritscalled.”

“Conglomerate.”

“Yeah, that. They aren’t even close to being the same thing. And I’m learning as I go here, it’s a challenge every day and I’m not even doing this alone.”

“But maybe if you could, I don’t know, increase your presence at QC? I don’t think you’d have to sign up for the CEO position but just… talk to the board.”

Thea was nibbling on her lip. “Why would they even listen to me?”

“Because, Thea, you’re a Queen. And right now, you’re the only one here to do it. I can’t force you to do anything you’re uncomfortable with, but there are 30,000 employees at QC right now, including yours truly. Imagine that many people losing their jobs, imagine what it might do to the _city_.”

Thea paled a little and Felicity felt a little bad for scaring the poor girl but at the same time, this was hugely important. And Felicity herself felt scared, and not just for her own personal interests. 

“Okay, I can see if I can meet with board. At least listen to what they have to say, see what they need,” Thea finally said. Felicity reached out and took her hand, squeezing it. 

“Thank you. If you need any moral support, I’m here.”

“I appreciate it. I just wish Ollie was here.”

Felicity felt her heart stumble. “Have you heard from him recently?”

“No. I know I shouldn’t worry, I know he’s upset about Laurel and I should just give him the time to be by himself and grieve, but… I just wish he was _here_. I lost him for five years and I have so much time to make up for with him. And not just that, but… I could help him. He shouldn’t have to grieve alone, he has family and friends that care for him.”

Felicity nodded. “I know. I wish his first impulse wasn’t to shut people out when he’s hurting.”

“That’s Ollie alright. You know, he didn’t always used to be that way. Just since he got back from the island.”

“Sometimes I wish I’d known him back then, and other times I’m glad that I didn’t,” Felicity admitted. 

Thea gave her a strange look. “Yeah. He’s definitely changed. Five years ago there’s no way he would have skipped town with our mom in prison.”

“How is she doing? Have you gone to visit her?”

“Nah.” She was trying to look casual about it but Felicity could read the tension in her jaw. “I just, don’t have anything to say to her.”

“Is there a trial date yet?” 

“Last I heard there wasn’t, but the lawyers are working on it. They’re calling me all the time.” She sighed. “The _last_ thing I feel like dealing with right now. It’s hard enough to be a Queen in this town right now…”

Felicity’s heart went out to the young girl. She was dealing with far more than the average teenage girl had to and she was doing it alone. “You’re doing a great job,” she finally told her. 

“Yeah?” 

“Definitely.”

Thea cocked her head and regarded her. “You know, I don’t think I’ve ever heard how you met my brother.”

She felt instantly flustered. Felicity knew how important it was to keep his secret life away from his sister and she didn’t want to say the wrong thing and make Thea suspicious. “Uh, he came to me at QC for some tech help.”

“Really?” Thea sounded surprised. 

“Uh… he, uh, spilt a latte on his laptop.”

“And you just, what, became friends?”

“Yeah, basically. He would come back for help and we sorta, built up a rapport.”

Thea frowned. “Ollie just doesn’t know girls that are just friends.”

Felicity didn’t know what to say to that. 

“I guess you must be special then,” Thea said, her smile looking a lot easier and more natural now. 

Felicity managed a smile in return. “Well, I don’t know about that. I think he just found it easy to be around me. No pressure, you know?”

“Hmm.” The younger Queen had a speculative look on her features. She was a sharp girl, regardless of her age, and Felicity could see that very little got past her. “I guess he’s lucky he’s not here, or I’d be grilling him instead of you. You’re a tough nut to crack.”

She laughed nervously. “I’m not that tough. There’s not much to tell, really. I’m just your basic plain boring IT girl.”

Thea raised her eyebrows. “I don’t think there’s anything basic, plain or boring about you.”

And now she was back to feeling unnerved. 

“I haven’t figured you out yet, ‘Lis, but I will eventually.”

That _definitely_ sounded like a promise. Felicity swallowed nervously and got to her feet. “Well, I’ll let you get back to work.”

“Yeah, I’m supposed to be filling out purchase orders. Roy just… distracted me.” Thea winked. 

“I somehow get the feeling you didn’t mind too much,” Felicity teased her. 

She got a grin in return. 

Felicity said goodbye and went back downstairs to claim her gin and tonic from Tommy before the club opened and she descended into the basement to battle the network once more. 


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Felicity works on searching for Oliver, despite anyone else's reservations.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know everyone is missing Oliver. So is Felicity! (and okay, maybe Dig and Tommy are too...) Our girl is working on it and you’ll see the first sign of him since chapter 3 in the next chapter which is going up on Saturday! Then we’ll be solidly in season 2 territory! Hold onto your hats!
> 
> Fanart provided by fistis. Also, a HUGE thank you to my beta the-silverforked-sky. She’s amazing and has such a wonderful understanding of this story and what I’m trying to do with it. I’m blessed to have her!

“Finally!” Felicity cried, pumping her fist in the air.

It was a few days later, a lazy Saturday afternoon, and she was holed up in the now blessedly air-conditioned foundry basement, working on securing the network. She’d been close last night but it was after midnight when she finally finished and she needed to run checks on her work before officially declaring it up and running. And she’d just been too tired to do more than drive herself home and fall into bed, still in her clothes. 

So, she’d woken up this morning, had a bagel with her coffee, taken a shower, put on some shorts and a t-shirt, thrown her drying hair into a ponytail and hurried out the door. For the last few hours, she’d been testing her network security and drinking coffee. Now, after all the tests were run, she was certain that the network was secure and she was ready to run the searches for Oliver. 

It felt good to be back in business, she thought, as she loaded Oliver’s photo and other information into the database and started the searches. She made sure to cover more than just airports and more than just the United States. Thea had mentioned Oliver telling her he was jetting around Europe so she included that in her search, though she had her doubts that he’d told his sister the truth about where he’d gone. But, it didn’t hurt to be thorough, so she expanded her searches globally, checking all major hub airports, as well as boat terminals, train stations and rental companies. 

It was going to take ages for these scans to run. A few days at least. Maybe even a whole week. Felicity had no idea as no search she’d ever run before was this big and widespread. But she was willing to wait as long as it took to find Oliver. 

Queen Consolidated needed him. Obviously that was her primary reason for wanting to find him. Stellmoor was doing more than just circling the company and all her co-workers were anxiously updating their resumes right now. The takeover was now a foregone conclusion and most people, even the cable news channels, had determined it was just a matter of time until QC was a thing of the past. She’d even heard a well known business analyst on CNN last night say the only thing that could save QC now was Oliver Queen returning to the city and taking the helm.

Plus, Thea needed her brother. Felicity had continued to keep an eye on the young girl. Roy kept her occupied and her spirits were mostly up around her boyfriend. But she could tell that family stress was weighing her down. She was angry at her mother, and probably hurt and confused by everything that was going on. Felicity wanted to urge her to go to Iron Heights to visit Moira but didn’t feel it was really her place. The two of them were becoming more friendly as the days went by, that was true. But she wasn’t quite close enough to cross that invisible boundary yet. 

But Oliver could. If nothing else, he’d be support for his little sister, support she badly needed. Thea hadn’t been exaggerating last week when she told Felicity that having the Queen name in Starling was a burden. Paparazzi followed the girl wherever she went and there were angry mobs roaming through the Glades. It was only a matter of time before they started in on Thea. It made Felicity nervous and she could only imagine how Oliver might feel if he knew his sister might be in danger. 

The only thing Felicity wasn’t quite ready to admit to herself yet was that she wanted Oliver to return for _her_. Any time her mind started to drift in that direction, she shut out the thoughts ruthlessly. She had absolutely no claim on the man and no right to ask him to return. What’s more, her asking him would likely have an opposite effect. If Oliver knew how she felt, it would probably send him running even further into hiding. 

She had to consider his history with romantic relationships. Her knowledge was pretty limited but she’d gotten a good glimpse through Tommy during the weeks prior to this. For instance, Felicity knew that the driving reason behind why Oliver took Sara on board the Gambit with him was because Laurel had just asked him to move in with her. Tommy was the only one who knew that Oliver was seeing Sara on the sly back then and he’d been sworn to secrecy. Right before the Gambit sailing, Oliver had unloaded to Tommy about a conversation he’d had with Laurel. She’d pointed out to him all their friends in relationships were moving in together. Tommy told Felicity that back then, Laurel had been goal driven, moreso than she’d been this last year even. And she’d seen her and Oliver’s future laid out and had romanticized it. At the time, Tommy said her dreams of becoming Mrs. Oliver Queen and them raising a family together had been what helped her see past all of Oliver’s blatant cheating and debauchery. It had frustrated him, just like it frustrated Felicity to hear it now. 

Oliver had always waved off those visions of wedding gowns and white picket fences but being pressed with the reality of actually acting on Laurel’s dreams had scared him. When Felicity had asked _why_ it scared him, Tommy had shrugged. 

“You’d have to ask him,” he’d told her. “But I think it was because he knew that he wasn’t really in love with Laurel. Not like she was with him. And not like he should have felt, given all their future plans that his own family kept pushing him towards.He was expected to become CEO of QC when Robert retired, Laurel was supposed to be his wife and they were supposed to be the next generation of Queen royalty in Starling City. It was one thing when that plan was abstract, but once it started becoming concrete, I think that scared the shit out of him.”

It made sense to Felicity, in a strange, backwards sort of way. Not that she thought cheating on your girlfriend or boyfriend is _ever_ acceptable. But she could understand being scared of a commitment when your heart just wasn’t fully in it. That would be frightening, especially if you thought you had no way out of it. Sometimes people, wealthy or poor, didn’t have the option to choose like she had. Felicity decided for herself that she wanted to go to MIT, leave Vegas far behind her and leave that lifestyle behind. She’d been lucky. But what if she’d been pushed into a cocktail waitress job like her mother? Safe to say that would have scared the crap out of her. 

So she got why Oliver ran, even if the way he did it was utterly abhorrent. There was never any excuse for running off with your girlfriend’s little sister. It spoke to Felicity of a desire to self-sabotage. Oliver might have thought at the time that he could get away with this, but no man did something like that if he didn’t want to get caught, even subconsciously. 

Ugh, what a mess. 

So, the fact remained, that Oliver’s track record with relationships wasn’t that great. Even since he’d been home he hadn’t had the best of luck, though Felicity could admit he had tried. She’d seen for herself how he’d wanted to help Helena. And she believed he’d truly liked McKenna, but he couldn’t be honest with her. A relationship without honesty was doomed to failure, in Felicity’s opinion. 

So, did she, a lowly tech nerd, have any reason to believe that she could either get a man like Oliver to embrace a healthy and committed relationship without running for the hills _or_ be any kind of suitable match for him in life anyhow? Just the thought of the paparazzi fueled gossip stories if they went on a date had her cringing. Everyone would be asking who was this mousey dweeb and had Oliver lost a bet somewhere? 

No, thanks. 

With that justification, Felicity was able to convince herself that she was running these searches for entirely noble, non-romantically inclined reasons. Really, she was just doing this to try to save the city and the Queen family. That was the only reason she needed. 

***

A day later and the searches were still running. Felicity was starting to feel antsy. She realized that now was as good a time as any to let Dig know she was actively looking for Oliver. Which meant she needed to head over to Dig’s apartment and pay him a friendly visit. She had no idea how the older man would react, but she was hoping that he’d be supportive. Especially when she outlined her completely platonic reasons for doing so. 

It took Dig a few minutes to answer the door and as soon as he did, Felicity could tell that something was wrong. He just looked _sad_. 

“Dig, what’s wrong?” she asked as soon as she was inside. 

“What makes you think anything is wrong?” he asked her, trying for a smile that failed to reach his eyes. 

“I know you and I can tell. Something is wrong.”

“Can I get you a drink?” he asked, backing towards the kitchen. 

“After you tell me what’s wrong.”

Dig huffed in frustration. “Alright. It’s just, I didn’t want to make a big deal out of it.”

“What is it?” She laid a hand on his forearm. Save for the day she learned about what happened to his brother, she’d never seen Dig this sad before. 

“Carly and I broke up.”

Her mouth fell open. Okay, she had _not_ been expecting that. “What? When?”

“Yesterday.”

“Oh, Dig…”

“See, I didn’t want you feeling sorry for me,” he told her, pointing an accusing finger at her face. 

She batted it away. “Well, too bad. Because I’m your friend and that’s what friends do.”

“I’m not used to having a friend as persistent as you,” he said. 

“Time to get used to it then. Have you eaten?”

“Since yesterday?”

“I meant dinner tonight!” she cried. “Okay, that’s it, I’m calling for pizza.”Felicity got out her cell phone and rang up the place around the corner that delivered, charging it to her card. 

Dig tried to protest but she just waved him off as she ordered a couple pizzas to be delivered as soon as possible. When she hung up she fixed her friend with a look. “You and I are going to pig out on pizza, drink beers and watch stupid movies all night until you’re feeling better again.”

He smiled at that. “Okay, I guess that sounds like a plan.”

“And maybe by then I’ll learn to forgive you for not calling me right away. I would have been over here last night with chocolates and wine.”

“I like pizza and beer better,” he told her. 

“Fair enough.”

It turned out there was a Starling City Rockets game that was being broadcast so they ended up watching that while waiting for the pizza. Felicity knew painfully little about baseball but listened attentively while Dig explained the rules to her and the positions on the field and what the different terms meant. Before long, she was cheering and groaning right alongside him. 

After the pizza came, they continued with the game until it was over. By then they were each on their third beer and had demolished one whole pizza. Felicity picked out ‘Blazing Saddles’ for them to watch. She hadn’t seen it before and Dig insisted it was a classic. 

“I cannot let you leave this apartment without seeing this,” Dig told her as he started up the DVD. “Have you seen _any_ Mel Brooks?”

“Uh, I saw ‘Robin Hood: Men in Tights’ years ago in college,” she said. 

“Of course you did,” Dig muttered, sitting back with his beer in hand. “Pay attention now, you’re watching a classic here.”

Sure enough, Felicity was howling with laughter mere minutes into the movie. Dig enjoyed her reactions as much as he enjoyed the film itself. By the time it was over, they’d finished the second pizza and two more beers. Felicity had moved on to water, even though Dig had insisted she was sleeping on his sofa that night. But she knew her own body well enough to know that if she drank plenty of water before going to sleep, she wouldn’t wake with much of a hangover. 

When the movie was over, Felicity turned to Dig and gave him a look. “Are you ready to talk about what happened with Carly yet?”

He sighed and rubbed a hand over his face. “We’d been having problems for a while,” he admitted. “I didn’t want to see it or admit it at first. But we grew short with each other and I could tell Carly was frustrated with me. I spent more and more time with AJ, taking him out to play softball or going to games… he came along with us a lot, almost as kind of a buffer which only frustrated Carly even more because I wasn’t giving her a chance to really _talk_ to me.”

“What was the problem?”

“It was a combination of things. I had some guilt, about dating my brother’s wife. But after a while I realized it was more than that. Deadshot is still out there, free, and he killed Andy. I can’t relax while he’s out there. I love Carly, but those feelings are too wrapped up in my own sense of responsibility towards my brother’s family.”

Felicity didn’t know what to say so she just held his hand as he talked. 

“In the end, I just didn’t know how to be with her and hate my brother’s killer all at the same time. So we finally talked and I told her all this and we both agreed that it was better to break up.”

“Dig, I’m so sorry.”

“Thanks, Felicity. I miss her but I think it was for the best. It just wasn’t… the right time for us.”

“I’m glad I could be here tonight, help take your mind off things though,” she said. 

“I’m glad too,” he replied, smiling at her. “But I know you didn’t come here to comfort me since you didn’t know we were broken up before you got here. So what did bring you by?”

Felicity couldn’t believe she’d almost forgotten her whole reason for coming over. “I’ve started up a search for Oliver.”

“You what?” Dig’s eyes went wide. 

“I got the foundry network up and secure and I started running searches, looking for Oliver.”

“What prompted this?” he asked. “I mean, before we were both just resigned to him being gone. That even if we knew where he was, there wasn’t much chance we could convince him to come back.”

“Stellmoor International is getting ready to wage a hostile takeover of Queen Consolidated. With no leadership and all the bad press all summer long, QC is vulnerable. The board needs a CEO to turn things around but no one will take the job. They want Oliver. I talked Thea into going to talk to them, but she doesn’t want the CEO job, nor is she really capable of it. She’s just eighteen and she was right when she told me that helping to run a club isn’t anywhere close to running a company like QC.”

“And you think Oliver could provide some stability? That he’d even want to?”

“There’s 30,000 jobs at risk, Dig. Think of how that would impact the city, when it’s already suffering. Plus, this is his family’s legacy and I can’t believe he’d be fine with letting it be torn apart like this.”

Dig nodded. “Yeah, okay. I see what you’re saying.”

“I feel like I have to try, Dig. And his family needs him too. Moira’s trial is coming up and he should be here. If not for her, then for Thea. This is an awful lot for a girl as young as her to handle alone.”

“I definitely agree with you there.But is there another reason you want to find him?” Dig asked. 

Felicity bit her lip. “What do you mean?” 

“I mean your feelings for Oliver. And whatever it was that happened after the Undertaking. You told me you’d tell me eventually and it’s been several months now. I haven’t wanted to push but…”

Felicity sighed and set her glass down. “At first I couldn’t tell you because I was too upset myself. I didn’t want to think about it because I felt so guilty.”

Dig’s brow furrowed at that. 

“But then, after I settled and stopped feeling quite so guilty… I started to worry about your reaction more than anything.”

“Me? Felicity, you know you can tell me anything.”

“I know, I know. But… I didn’t want you to be disappointed. Or angry at me. Or at Oliver. So just… promise me you won’t get too mad?”

“Felicity…”

“Please, Dig.”

He threw up his hands and then scrubbed them over his head. “Okay, fine. I promise.”

She blew out a breath and settled back into the sofa cushions. This felt like the time she’d told her mother she’d lost her virginity to Josh back in high school. Except maybe ten times worse because it was _Dig_. 

“I went up there to check on him. Tommy told me he’d seen Oliver at CNRI after the collapse, leaving the building. I knew he had to be upset. Then, what I knew about his fight with Merlyn on that rooftop, I figured he had to be injured too.”

Dig nodded. “He’d stabbed himself through the shoulder in order to kill Merlyn. I’ve never seen anything like it, not even in Afghanistan.”

“Tommy told me where this cabin was and I went right there with some medical supplies and food. I found him bleeding out on a bed there, delirious with fever. He looked half dead and I know he would have died from infection if I hadn’t gone to him, Dig.”

“You did what I would have done, Felicity.” 

She laughed harshly. “Well, you wouldn’t do what I did next. After his fever broke, I made him some soup for lunch and I got him to talk a little and just… he was so sad, Dig. I was just trying to make him feel better. But… one thing lead to another and a kiss became two kisses and then we were in the bedroom and…”

Dig held up a hand. “I don’t need to hear any more.So.You slept with him?”

Felicity nodded, feeling tears fill her eyes. “I did. It didn’t feel wrong at the time. It felt right. And I wanted to make him feel better, so badly. I just… I lost my head, Diggle.”

Dig’s eyes were filled with anger and her heart seized. “I’m not angry at you, Felicity,” he assured her. “I’m angry at Oliver for taking advantage of you.”

“But he didn’t. I was there too and it was just as much me as it was him,” she insisted. 

“He and I _talked_ about this, after you came on the team. I warned him about the danger of getting involved with you, that he couldn’t just… sleep with you and expect it not to change everything,” Dig said, his voice shaking with anger. 

“I know that, Dig. Believe me, I spent the last few months telling myself the same thing.”

“You have feelings for him.”

Her heart stuttered. “No, I—“ She caught herself. “How did you know?”

Dig gave her a half smile. “I’ve known since I first saw you two in a room together. The way you looked at him. The energy between you two. I knew you had a crush. And then, when you joined the team, I saw that crush grow into something more. You worried over him, you argued with him, you believed in him… If I hadn’t seen it with my own two eyes, I never would have believed it. But you fell in love with him and I know it as well as I know your name, Felicity.”

She knew her cheeks were flaming red. “I thought I hid it so well,” she mumbled. 

“Maybe you did. But it’s my job to notice things, Felicity. And I noticed you.”

“Shit. Do you think he noticed?” 

“Yes, I do.” 

“Shit!”

“Look at it this way; if he didn’t know before he sure does now,” Dig said. 

“That doesn’t actually help a whole lot,” she grumbled. Letting her head fall back against the sofa cushions, she groaned. “I just… I’ve been worried that I ruined our relationship. We’ve all worked so well together and how can we get back to that?”

“I don’t know, Felicity. I’m not going to lie, this is going to change everything, if he ever does come back and if he ever decides to pick up that hood again.”

Her heart plummeted. “That’s what I was afraid of.”

“But I want you to know that I think this would have happened eventually anyhow.” 

She jerked her head up, meeting Dig’s steady gaze. “What?”

“This would have happened with you and him eventually. Sure, maybe not for a few years yet, but I think this was actually inevitable.”

“How can you say that??”

“Because I believe it’s true. I already told you that I knew you had feelings for him. He has feelings for you too.”

“Platonic feelings.”

“I don’t think his feelings for you have ever been 100% platonic, Felicity. He might not have realized it, but I believe his feelings are much deeper than that.”

Felicity sighed. “We’ll just have to disagree.”

“I’m still mad at him,” Dig told her. 

“Well, you’re basically my big brother, John Diggle. I expect nothing less,” she told him with a grin. 

***

A week later, Felicity went in to the lair to check on the searches again. She’d been by every day, looking for results but so far, nothing. She’d known it might take a bit longer since the net she had cast was so wide. But she was starting to wonder if there would be any hits at all. And the implications of what _no_ hits might mean. 

After all, if he was out there, he’d show up on her searches eventually. She was searching months worth of data from all around the globe. There was no way he wouldn’t show up _somewhere_ in that amount of time. 

She tried to remind herself that even if the worst had happened, she would hit a result eventually. It was just that the longer it’d been since there was a hit on him, the lower the likelihood of finding him alive somewhere.That was just the facts. 

Felicity _hated_ those facts. 

So each day, her nervousness grew as she’d arrive at the lair to check on the status. She had an alert pushed through to her cellphone to ping her when the results came in but she couldn’t keep herself from going in to check herself each day. She justified the time spent there by doing some last minute polishing to the renovated lair. Oliver’s new bow had arrived and she had a whole new shipment of supplies for making arrows delivered. Everything was brighter, more efficient, better looking. Including the glass case with the silver mannequin, bearing Oliver’s leathers and hood. 

She found herself gazing at it far more frequently than she’d like to admit. 

Of course she missed him. She’d miss Dig too if he’d been gone for five months. But it was getting more difficult to convince herself that it wasn’t because of, at least in part, her feelings for him. Still, even though she was finally acknowledging them, she wasn’t about to let those feelings color her mission to bring Oliver home. 

Felicity set her purse on her desk and sat in her chair, turning on the monitors and quickly scanning the progress. As she looked over the results from the last few hours, she saw what might be a hit. It hadn’t pushed through to alert her cell phone because the accuracy percentage was relatively low and she’d set a 90% positive threshold. 

The ping was in Hong Kong, of all places. The airport. But the moment she saw the grainy security camera footage, her skin prickled. Baseball cap pulled low over his eyes, sunglasses on, cargo shorts that she actually thought she recognized and button down short sleeved shirt… it looked just like him. The build and just… the way he held himself, even in that blurry still shot, all screamed Oliver to her. 

Felicity checked the date… it was the day of the deposit on their accounts. Just about an hour from when Felicity had discovered the money, in fact. But that was local Hong Kong time and once she factored in the time difference and travel time, Felicity knew this was where he’d gone directly after he’d left Starling. She tried searching the local airport and train stations and such but nothing had come back on those locations, strangely enough. 

Then again, Felicity had every confidence that if Oliver didn’t want to be found, he wouldn’t be found. As she searched the Hong Kong airport for more signs of him, she was only more sure of that fact. That one still from that one camera was a fluke. 

Still, it was a lead and more than she’d had in a week’s time. It was also probably the only lead she’d get. With a determined set to her jaw, she got to work making phone calls around the airport. She faxed over pictures of Oliver and photocopies of his passport to different airlines and businesses while she focused her search in and around Hong Kong, hoping for another hit. 

Several hours later, she _finally_ got a lead. An old man who runs a charter airline out of Hong Kong recognized Oliver’s picture though he said the name he went by was different. “Laurence Smith.” That was him alright. He’d chartered a flight out over the North China Sea and had parachuted out over an island. The man faxed her the coordinates and Felicity thanked him profusely for his time. 

When she hung up, she input the coordinates just to be sure but she already knew where Oliver had ended up. 

Lian Yu. 

***

Tommy was just leaving the office to head to Verdant to get ready for that night’s festivities. Juggling both the jobs meant he didn’t get a lot of sleep, but sleep often brought nightmares anyhow. He didn’t stay late at Verdant; just long enough to make sure everything was ready and got started without a hitch. He liked to greet the VIPs and check in with all the bartenders and waitresses before he left for the night. Thea usually hung around till closing; since she was able to sleep in the next day, it wasn’t a big hardship for her. So far, the balance worked. 

He was just getting into his car in the Merlyn Global garage when his phone chimed with a text message. He pulled it out and saw it was a message from Felicity. Smiling, he thumbed the phone and brought up the message on the screen. 

 

**Come to Verdant, I have something I need to tell you.**

 

He raised his eyebrows and hummed to himself. Usually, he and Felicity met up more casually, running into one another at the club and stopping for a quick drink or a chat. He looked forward to those moments. 

Getting to know Felicity had been a huge bright spot for him since that awful night back in May. He looked at the Undertaking as his low point. Laurel dying had devastated him. If he hadn’t come across Felicity that night, saved her from underneath that collapsed shelving unit, shared those drinks with her… Tommy didn’t know what he would have done that night. Drunk himself into unconsciousness? What if he’d done something after he drank? Got behind the wheel or walked into the bay or off the Merlyn Global roof? 

Tommy shuddered at the thought and he tried not to think about it, actually. But he’d been as low as he’d ever been that night. And Felicity had given him something and someone else to focus on. Her friendship in the weeks that followed helped him to see that his life wasn’t over and while his heart was broken, there was hope for the future. 

A few weeks ago, he’d teased Felicity about having a crush on her. He hadn’t really been exaggerating. It was hard to be around a woman like her, bright and funny and beautiful, and not develop some feelings. But he also knew that she was in love with Oliver. And he’d grown to respect himself enough after the events of the last year not to go down a road like that again. 

He didn’t regret telling her that. Felicity deserved to hear that people admired her, as much as possible. While he knew that Oliver relied deeply on her, Tommy doubted that he really ever told Felicity what he thought of her, how she made him feel, how important she was. Which made him think that his former best friend was a colossal fool. 

Smiling, Tommy tapped out a quick reply to Felicity’s text.

 

**On my way there rn. What’s up?**

 

Her reply came quickly. 

 

**I’ll tell you when you get here. I called Dig too.**

 

Hmm. If Dig was there it was related to vigilante business. Tommy still wasn’t sure how to feel about all of that. He’d softened a lot, in the months since the Undertaking, once he realized that the fallout would have been a lot worse without Oliver and his team. Mostly, what he was left with were hurt feelings brought on by Oliver’s secretive behavior. 

But here was Felicity, including him. He felt… good about that, actually. Intrigued, he headed towards Verdant, wondering what the impetuous blonde had to share that was so urgent. 


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's time to go find Oliver and bring him back home. Felicity's nerves are shot over the entire ordeal.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know many of you have probably been waiting for Oliver's return and I appreciate your patience. :) I'm glad you enjoyed the friendship stuffs in the meantime and I feel those moments were important. This is more Felicity's story than it is anything else, though we will start seeing more of Oliver's POV from now on. 
> 
> Big thanks for fistis for the beautiful artwork. 
> 
> I shudder to think what this fic would have been without the-silverforked-sky. She's an amazing beta.

Tommy walked into Verdant and found Felicity already sitting up at the bar. She had her tablet in front of her, her fingers flying across the screen. Diggle stood next to her, leaning on the bar, sipping a coffee. The rest of the place was empty; Thea either wasn’t in yet or was in the stockroom. Or she was with Roy. Tommy shuddered, putting that thought out of her mind. She might not be his sister, but he grew up with her more or less filling that role in his life so the thought of her with a guy was just… distasteful. 

“So, what’s the fire?” he asked as he approached the bar. He slipped his suit coat off, hanging it over a barstool and began to roll up his sleeves. The air conditioning was working great, but he was ready to loosen up and let off steam. He began to loosen his tie as well. 

Felicity looked up and smiled at him. “No fire, but I had some big news to share with both of you,” she said. 

Tommy nodded to Diggle, who nodded back, and folded his arms as he regarded his favorite blonde IT girl. “Okay, let us have it.”

“It’s about Oliver,” she said, setting her tablet aside. 

“Have you had luck with your searches?” Dig asked. 

“Searches?” Tommy asked, confused. “What searches?”

“I’ve been looking for Oliver,” Felicity told him. “Last week, as soon as I had the network secured downstairs, I began running searches for Oliver across the globe. I focused on airports and such and major cities. It was a long shot, but QC needs him, Thea needs him… this city still needs him.”

“And you found him?” he asked, not sure if he was anticipating or dreading her answer. The thought of seeing Oliver again filled Tommy with no small amount of conflicting emotions. He missed him, but he was still upset with him. 

“I did. It was a questionable hit but I could tell it was him. I just could.He was in the Hong Kong airport the day or so after Laurel’s funeral.”

“Hong Kong?!” Tommy cried. Why in the hell would he want to go back to that particular part of the world? Tommy remembered when he’d traveled there, years ago, in search of Oliver. There’d been some evidence that he’d signed into his email account and, his heart full of hope, Tommy had flown to Hong Kong, only to be kidnapped by some thug, told Oliver was most definitely dead, and to leave or else he’d be next. Which… now that he thought about it, was rather suspicious, given that Oliver hadn’t been dead after all. 

“I called around and found a man who runs a charter plane company that recognized his picture,” she went on. “I also got the location this man flew him to and dropped him off, literally, at.”

“Don’t tell me,” Diggle said, his voice a groan. “He went back to Lian Yu.”

“He went back to Lian Yu,” Felicity confirmed. 

“What the hell for?” Tommy wanted to know. “That place was his prison for five years. By his own account, it was a horrible place. Why on earth would he want to go back there?”

Felicity looked uncertain, but Diggle did not. “It actually makes sense,” he said. “I spent a lot of time in Afghanistan before coming back to the States. If there’s any place on earth that could give Lian Yu a run for its money on awfulness, it’s the Middle East during the last ten or so years.But whenever my tour was up, I would re-enlist.”

Tommy gave the man a strange look. He’d always respected Diggle, mostly because of his uncanny ability to not be impressed by a single one of Oliver’s antics when he’d first returned home. But what he was saying made no sense. Diggle saw the look and smiled at him. 

“I know, it seems crazy, right? But sometimes the hell you know beats the hell you don’t. And a man like Oliver, who carries guilt and responsibility like it’s a suit he wears… he would think he deserves to be in a place like that. I’m gonna bet that he thinks he’s punishing himself. But it’s also a strange sort of comfort too. He’s alone, he can’t hurt anyone and no one can hurt him.”

Tommy felt a helplessness squeezing in his chest. That his best friend, his _former_ best friend, would have feelings like those, be so entwined in guilt and self loathing… He’d accused Oliver of being a murderer. He’d said some horrible things to him before the Undertaking. And, dammit, he’d meant all of those things. Now he was faced with the reality of Oliver’s psyche, his insecurity, the things that made him human and that made him the guy that’d been his best friend. 

“That sounds like Oliver,” Felicity agreed softly, her eyes downcast. 

Tommy looked between her and Diggle and was struck by how well these two knew Oliver. He’d known him that well before the island, they’d been like brothers. But since he’d been home, Ollie had been like a stranger. And now he could see that he was closer with Felicity and Diggle than he was with him and it made him feel a whole new layer of emotions about everything, including their failed relationship. 

“What are you going to do?” he asked them. He didn’t buy for a second that Felicity would spend all this time searching for Oliver to just sit on the information and do nothing about it. 

“I want to go get him. Bring him back to Starling,” she announced. 

Tommy’s mouth fell open as he stared at her. “By _yourself_??” 

“Nope. Uh uh.No way,” Dig said, shaking his head. 

“My plan is to fly to Hong Kong and charter the same plane and pilot that flew Oliver to the island. When I get on the island, I will find Oliver and tell him about what’s happening with Queen Consolidated and Thea and Moira’s trial coming up and convince him to come back to Starling. Then we’ll fly back here.Ta da!”

Tommy took a breath and blew it out. His mind was already swirling with at least a dozen different things that could go catastrophically wrong with that scenario and one look over at Diggle told him the man was thinking the same thing.

“Felicity, this isn’t a great idea,” Diggle said, his voice gentle and placating. “You don’t even know where on that island to find him and from the stories Oliver has told, it’s not a friendly place. You could get seriously hurt, or killed, before you even found him.”

“And that’s if you even made it to the charter… I don’t think it’s very smart for a pretty young woman to travel alone over there.”

“I’m going to ignore that incredibly sexist statement, Tommy Merlyn,” she said, shaking a finger at him. “And as for you, John Diggle, you say that like you don’t know Oliver would surely find me moments after I arrived… nothing gets past him and plane landing there would certainly be noticed by him.”

“Maybe we should wait, or find some other way to get word to him,” Diggle suggested. 

Felicity stood up and slammed her hand down on the bar, making a loud smacking noise that had them both jumping. Her eyes snapped with anger and her mouth was set. “No! I’m not waiting anymore. We’ve waited for five months and it’s time to go find him and bring him home. Now.”

Tommy was stunned. He’d never seen her angry like that before. It was… stunning, actually. He licked his lips, wanting to be careful not to piss her off any more than she already was. “Felicity, I understand why you want to go get him. I really do.”

“Tommy, don’t you dare talk me out of this.”

He held up his hands. “I’m not. I’m not, I promise. I just think you shouldn’t go alone, that’s all.”

“What the hell, man!” Diggle cried, glaring at him accusingly. “You’re encouraging her?”

“Diggle, she’s going to go anyhow. Nothing you or I can do can stop her.”

“I can sure as hell stop her. I can lock her in her apartment.”

Felicity turned her glare on Diggle. “You wouldn’t dare!”

“Try me!”

“C’mon. You know you’re not going to do that. It seems to me the best option here is to go with her,” Tommy said. Felicity flashed him a grateful smile. 

“Oliver would never forgive me if I let her set foot on Lian Yu. I could never forgive myself. That is guaranteed the last place on earth either of us would want her to be,” Diggle said. 

“Don’t talk about me like I’m not here,” Felicity said angrily. 

“Felicity, you know I’m right. Oliver would be furious with me. This flies in the face of what he asked me in his farewell note. He told me to keep you safe, to watch out for you. If I let you do this…”

“Diggle, this isn’t about you ‘letting’ me do something. I’m going to do this. It’s already been decided. I’m a big girl, I can take care of myself. Now, if you’ll both excuse me, I’m going to go book my ticket to Hong Kong for as soon as I can manage it.”

Felicity grabbed her tablet and stalked off to the basement, leaving Tommy and Diggle watching her go. Tommy felt bad for her, he understood where she was coming from. On the other hand, he also appreciated Diggle’s position. He’d apparently promised Oliver to look out for her and letting her to go a murderous island would fly in the face of that promise. 

“You get what I’m saying, don’t you?” Diggle implored. 

Tommy felt bad for the guy. No one wanted to deliberately upset Felicity but he had to feel as though he was stuck between a rock and a hard place. 

“I do get what you’re saying. But Felicity feels she needs to do this. And she’s going to, with or without your help.”

“Oliver would never speak to me again.”

“Consider how much angrier Oliver would be if you let her go by herself. If you’re there with her, it’s not like you’re not doing what he asked. You’re keeping an eye on her, keeping her safe,” Tommy pointed out. 

“That’s true…”

“And I’m not convinced that there’s a significant part of him that won’t be at least a little happy to see her. You’ll probably escape his wrath, unscathed.”

Diggle snorted. “There’s a lot of uncertainties in that sentence, Merlyn.”

“You know I’m right about this,” Tommy insisted. 

“Yeah, okay. I do. I just… I don’t want her to get her hopes up. She’s so sure that Oliver will come back if she asks him to but I feel it’s not that simple. He left for a reason and he’s a stubborn man.”

Tommy was again struck by how well this man knew Oliver. Even when they were kids, Ollie had always been stubborn about getting his way and his opinions on things.It’d lead to more than one fight between the two of them, sometimes even physical. That was back when Tommy could expect to at least hold his own, but these days, no way. Diggle, on the other hand, might be able to put Ollie on his back. Which is why Tommy was suggesting Diggle go with Felicity and not himself. 

“Felicity is stubborn too,” Tommy pointed out. “Just as stubborn as he is.”

Diggle scoffed. “Tell me about it.You should see the two of them butt heads sometime.”

“Dear god. And you’ve been privy to this from the start,” Tommy said, leaning on the bar. He wasn’t a gossiper by nature but… he couldn’t deny he was intrigued by the potential for some juicy news from the vigilante lair. 

“Nearly the start. The first time Oliver took me with him to QC to get Felicity’s help on a case, I thought it was a fluke. The way she flustered him and he flustered her and her adorable little rambles… But then I started to see that this happened every single time they were in the same room. Then, when Felicity joined the team, that’s when things got real.”

“Oh? Don’t skimp on the details, Diggle.” Tommy grinned. He was enjoying the mental image of the man Oliver was since his return, stiff and brooding, being confronted by what amounted to a bright, blonde, ball of light. 

The other man chuckled. “The first day she was in the basement with us, Oliver was getting ready to go put the fear of god into some deadbeat landlord and Felicity was afraid he was going to kill the guy. She’d looked him up, saw the man was a single father and ended up locking Oliver in the basement. Wouldn’t let him out.”

“No shit! Felicity did that??”

“Yep. Oh, man, Oliver was pissed. I stood there and watched the whole thing. He came stalking over to her and I think he thought he’d use her attraction to him to sway her.”

“Oh, he _didn’t_.”

“He did. He leaned over her where she was sitting at the computers, very physical, got in her face. He turned off the locks and then he gave her some line in this low voice about not being the only one who can reboot his system.”

Tommy’s eyes nearly fell out of his head. “Oh my god. I would have paid good money to see that. What did she do?”

“She looked a little rattled but then she shocked the hell out of both of us by pushing him back as she got to her feet. You know how tiny she is, right? Can you imagine her trying to stand up to him? But she did and it was… impressive. Then she told him it was a mistake agreeing to help him and she walked right out.”

“Holy shit. Felicity is hardcore.” Tommy had always known she was more than just a meek blonde geek, but the spine of steel she apparently possessed came as a surprise to him.

“Tell me about it. It impressed Oliver, I’ll tell you that. And ever since he’s taken care to make sure he doesn’t disappoint her.”

“Wait, are you saying that he will defer to her?” Tommy couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Even before the island, Oliver had always been the sort to exert his will in his relationships, even friendships.Tommy should know. 

“I don’t know if ‘defer’ is the right word here. But he values her opinion. He respects her wishes. She did more in one week on the team than I was able to do in months.”

“Jesus, he _is_ in love with her,” Tommy breathed. 

Diggle laughed out loud at that. 

***

Metal rattled and crashed as the plane was jostled in the air. Felicity screwed her eyes shut and held her breath, reminding herself that this was normal. The pilot, the little old Chinese man she’d spoken with on the phone, wasn’t concerned so she shouldn’t be concerned either, right? 

That thinking worked in theory, but not so much in practice. 

Her stomach dipped and swooped along with the plane and Felicity was starting to question whether or not this was such a great idea after all. She was strapped up in up front, which meant she had an excellent view out the windows. It also meant she’d have an excellent view of the ocean should they suddenly plummet into the North China Sea. 

Dig was hanging out behind her, not strapped in and seemingly not bothered by the bumpy ride. Right now, he was on the lookout, along with the pilot, for the island. Felicity would be looking with them, but she was concentrating on keeping her breakfast down. 

Her nerves were frayed, not just because of the terrible plane right, but also because she was second guessing the wisdom of this whole endeavor. What had she been thinking? She’d just hauled off and purchased plane tickets like this was no big deal, like she had some sort of expectation that Oliver would listen to her. That she could even _find_ him to begin with. After all, she was going to Murder Island and who knew what sort of booby traps awaited the unsuspecting there. Even with Dig along to keep an eye on her, Felicity was thinking up scenarios where he couldn’t prevent the worst from happening. 

Like what if this plane crashed into the island? What if landing was a billion times more difficult than taking off? Because take off hadn’t been all that smooth and really, that should have been a sign right there. 

She hadn’t wanted to admit it at the time, but she was very glad that Dig had insisted on coming along with her. While she would have probably done this alone if she’d had to, chances were good that she might have regretted that decision once she’d landed in Hong Kong.An international recovery mission wasn’t as simple as one might think. 

Or maybe one wouldn’t think that at all. A year ago, she certainly wouldn’t have. 

What was she going to say to him when she saw him again? Felicity hadn’t seen nor spoken to Oliver directly since she’d left the cabin that day, five months ago. Maybe, in those five months, she’d given herself the wrong impression about how much influence she had on Oliver. It wasn’t like she expected to walk up to him on Lian Yu and tell him he had to go home and have him agree with her. But what on earth made her think she could talk him out of staying hidden? Dig had been right, that afternoon at Verdant. Oliver was a stubborn man and if he’d left Starling, he had a good reason to. 

What if she came off looking like a clingy girlfriend? Oliver wouldn’t care for that one bit, Felicity knew, and if he thought she’d come for him just because of some idealized vision of them together, he’d probably laugh in her face. Okay, no, he probably wouldn’t. But she wouldn’t blame him if he did. She’d laugh in her own face if she could manage it. What on _earth_ was she thinking? 

The worst possibility of all was that Oliver would be angry with her for coming. What if he was so furious he refused to listen to her, to talk to her, to even _look_ at her?She was already afraid that sleeping together had ruined their friendship, what if this move was the straw that broke the camel’s back? What if he not only refused to return to Starling and she had to leave him on that island, but he never spoke to her again? She wasn’t sure she could stand that. 

But then Felicity remembered why she was sitting in this tin can with wings, flying above the choppy water with little more than a wish to hold it together. Queen Consolidated needed Oliver. And, by extension, needed her too. She reminded herself of the 30,000 employees. She thought about Thea, who was adrift without her family but trying to stay strong. She thought about Moira, diabolical and conniving but facing the trial of her life. She thought about Tommy and how much was left unsettled and unsaid between him and Oliver. Tommy clearly missed his friend, and he needed to grieve with someone who loved Laurel as much as he did. Oliver _needed_ to go home. This was why she was here, doing this. He could just go ahead and be mad at her. But she wasn’t going to back down. 

The plane bounced a few more times and Felicity groaned. Her stomach felt like it’d been run through a washing machine. She felt Diggle’s hand on her shoulder, warm and reassuring. 

“You okay?”

“No,” she moaned. “Why did I let you talk me into this?” 

He chuckled. “We’re almost there.”

“You said that a half hour ago and I swear to god we’ve almost died five times since then.”

“Felicity, if you’re so scared, why did you insist on sitting up front?” he asked, his voice patient. 

“This is the only seat besides the pilot that has a seatbelt,” she pointed out, closing her eyes again as the plane swooped. 

“Which will come in very handy when we hit the water at 180 miles an hour,” Dig said dryly. 

She whipped her head around to look at him with wide eyes. “What??”

“Which _will not_ happen. I promise.” 

Felicity wished so badly that she could just believe him. 

It was only a moment or so later that the pilot started chattering in Mandarin and pointing out the window. Felicity peered through the clouds as they parted, seeing a dark shape in the water below. 

“I think that means we’re here,” Dig said before moving towards the back of the plane. 

“Lian Yu,” she murmured, staring out at it. It looked different than she’d imagined. For one thing, it was a lot larger. There were a lot of craggy peaks, a lot of trees. It just looked unfriendly, like something out of a gothic horror novel. Even with the sun shining around them, the island looked dark and cold. She shivered. 

“Okay, Felicity. Unbuckle and get back here,” Dig said, interrupting her thoughts. 

She looked behind her to see Diggle strapping on a parachute. Her stomach swooped again but this time it had nothing to do with the plan dipping. 

“But I thought you said the parachutes were just in case!” she cried, feeling her heart rate skyrocket. 

“Yeah, just in case we made it here,” he quipped. 

“Dig, you are absolutely _not_ helping.”

“C’mon, Felicity. I’ll keep you safe. I’ve done this a hundred times before.” 

Somehow, that didn’t make her feel too much better. 

But, she’d come too far to turn back now. So she carefully unbuckled from her seat and, bending over, walked back to where Dig was tightening the straps and readying a harness for her. She was supposed to put that harness on and then Dig would clip her to his body. It relieved her a little to know she wouldn’t be responsible for knowing when and how to deploy her own parachute. 

Still, once she was clipped to Dig and the door was opened, Felicity started to rethink the whole thing. “I can’t do this,” she said as Dig edged them towards the open door. 

“You can, Felicity.”

“No! I really don’t think I can!”

“On the count of three. Ready?”

“I’m not ready! I can’t do this!”

“One—“

And then, they were tumbling out into the open air. Felicity screamed, long and loud, and made a mental note to let Dig have it for not counting all the way to three. 

***

Their landing on the one stretch of beach they could find could have been done with a bit more dignity, in Felicity’s opinion. Thankfully, for her pride and Diggle’s shoes, she didn’t throw up until they’d touched down and unhooked. But once they were, her breakfast made the reappearance it’d been threatening to make all morning. Once she wiped her mouth and rinsed out with some of the bottled water they’d brought with them, and Dig had stowed the parachute in his bag, they set off into the woods in search of Oliver. 

This place was creepy. There was no better word for it. First, in the bay there’d been a half-sunk freighter, then on the beach there was a black and orange mask stuck on an arrow, as though it were a trophy or something. The arrow head went through one of the eyes of the mask and Felicity felt a shudder down to her toes as she hurriedly followed Dig into the woods. 

The sun was all but blocked out once they were under the cover of the trees, and the temperature plummeted. Felicity was thankful she’d worn her jacket. She was also thankful for the sensible sneakers because it made trekking the uneven terrain a lot easier. 

“Do you know where you’re going?” she asked Dig. 

“Of course not. But I’m looking for signs, recent signs. Hoping if I see some that it’s just him and not anyone else.”

That thought hadn’t even _occurred_ to her. 

Dig walked ahead of her through the trees and Felicity worked on both keeping up with his long strides and not tripping over a tree root or a rock or something. With the sun filtering through a little and all the ferns… it was _almost_ pretty here. If the nightmare that Oliver literally had to live through could be ignored, that is. 

Eventually, she started babbling, just to fill the silence. Dig was used to it, thankfully, and just let her talk. But after a few minutes he held his hand up, signaling her to both stop and be quiet. 

“What is it?” she whispered. 

He was still for a long moment before relaxing. “Thought I heard something.”

They continued on and Felicity found her mind wandering a little when she both felt something underneath her shoe when she took a step and heard an ominous _click_. She stiffened instinctively.

“Dig?” she said, her voice wavering. 

He whipped around and looked at her. She pointed down at her foot, scared to move so much as a muscle. He looked down and looked visibly upset. 

“Don’t move,” he told her, slowly kneeling before her to have a closer look. 

“I wasn’t planning on it,” she muttered. “What is it?”

“It’s a landmine.”

“A landmine??” she whisper-shouted. Then, she breathed slowly, trying to calm herself. 

“Shh…” he hushed, brushing the dirt away from around her foot, trying to get a better look. “I’m going to try to disarm it.”

“You can’t!” a voice from above them shouted. 

Felicity’s heart leapt. That was Oliver’s voice! She whipped her head around, searching for him. 

“Diggle! Slowly back away!” he called again. Dig did as Oliver told him, getting carefully to his feet and backing away from her. 

She found him, perched on a branch high above their heads. The sun was behind him, backlighting him like some sort of larger than life hero. Which, she supposed, he was. He was predictably shirtless, his chest glistening with sweat and a hand-crafted quiver strapped around his chest.He had a bow at his side, looking like it was a part of him.Her heart continued to pound in her chest, partially because of the danger she was in and partly because he looked so good. She hadn’t seen him in so long and had actually begun to worry she might _never_ see him again. 

“Felicity!Don’t move!” he shouted to her. 

“Okay!” she called back. He was going to do something to save her! Though she couldn’t imagine what from that far up. 

Her question was answered a moment later when he fired a rope attached to an arrow at a tree across the clearing from where they stood. She understood that he intended to swing down and pluck her off the landmine a mere second before he grabbed the rope and dropped from the branch he’d been standing on. 

Dig dove out of the way and Felicity braced herself. A moment later, Oliver’s arms wrapped around her, lifting her off her feet as though she weighed nothing at all. Wind whipped at her ponytail as they sailed together through the humid jungle air. Behind them, the landmine detonated, the explosion unnaturally loud in the still quiet of the afternoon. Dirt and foliage rained around them and birds called in alarm above their heads as they landed on the ground. 

Oliver tried to keep his weight off her as much as possible, but he settled between her legs in a position that was entirely _too_ familiar. Felicity could not help but flash back to that night at the cabin, the weight of Oliver as he settled over her, his lips on hers, his hands stroking… 

She blinked, trying to pull herself back into the moment and readjusted her glasses where they’d slipped off her nose. Oliver was staring down at her, his expression intense and unreadable. Her tongue felt thick and her throat dry but she had to say _something._

“God you’re— You’re really sweaty,” she told him. 

One of his eyebrows lifted and, if she wasn’t mistaken, his lips quirked a little as well. 

“You’re a hard man to find,” Diggle called. Felicity turned her head to see him pulling himself up out of a cluster of ferns, dusting himself off. 

Oliver sighed as he finally drew his eyes away from hers. “You shouldn’t have come here,” he told them. 

Which was pretty much exactly what she was expecting he would say.

“We have good reasons why we did,” she told him and he looked down at her again. She shifted a little underneath him and he went utterly still, as though he was just realizing the position they were in. 

Carefully, Oliver moved off of her, getting to his feet and then extending a hand to help her up. He watched her closely as she dusted the dirt and leaves off the back of her legs. “Why don’t we discuss this somewhere else,” he suggested, his expression still closed and somber. 

Felicity felt frustrated with his lack of reaction to either her or Diggle. “Where else is there?”

“C’mon, we’ll go to where I’ve been staying. It’s not far from here.” 

Without waiting for confirmation, he walked into the jungle. Dig shrugged at her and followed after him, leaving Felicity to grumble as she went after Dig. It’s not that she’d been expecting a warm welcome but at least some pleasure at seeing them again wouldn’t have been remiss. 

Then again, this _was_ Oliver and he was in prime brooding form right now. Felicity realized, with a sinking heart, she had her work cut out for her in convincing this man to return to his home. 


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Felicity has her work cut out for her in convincing Oliver to return to Starling. Meanwhile, Dig does an excellent job of playing go-between and relationship counselor. He could probably add those skills to his resume.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love this chapter! This is a very talk-y chapter, with lots of juicy conversations. I hope you guys enjoy it too. Next chapter Things Happen. I can't wait for you guys to read that one too. Anyhow. I hope everyone had a lovely weekend. My weekend was kinda meh. I mean, it wasn't bad but it was just... not as great as it could have been I guess. I had my hopes up high. Way to disappoint, weekend. And now we're back into another week. LE SIGH. 
> 
> Huge thanks to fistis for her artwork and to the-silverforked-sky for her tireless beta work (I nearly broke her with chapter 12 this last weekend but thanks to her patience and determination, we made it something tolerable for you all to read when we get there).

Oliver’s mind was racing as he walked back to the fuselage with Dig and Felicity following along behind him. He’d never expected to see these two people on this island; the blending of his past and his present was messing with his mind more than a little bit. 

He’d been out doing some patrols and a little hunting when he heard the plane flying overhead. Planes usually didn’t get so low unless they were landing or someone was jumping. That was how he’d gotten to the island, five months before. He saw a parachute deploy, confirming his suspicions. Given his history on Lian Yu, he was immediately on guard and hurried to the beach to see who it was. It could just as easily be foe as it could be friend. In fact, the former outcome was far more likely. 

When he saw the flash of Felicity’s blonde ponytail in the warm afternoon sunlight, his heart had threatened to stop beating altogether. She was wearing pants, a t-shirt and a jacket, nothing particularly enticing, and yet she looked as good to him as she ever had. His eyes traced the curve of her body as she followed Dig into the woods and he slipped away to keep an eye on the both of them as they moved further into places that could be potentially dangerous. 

He couldn’t figure out what they were doing here, unless they’d come to try to talk him into going back. He’d thought Diggle would understand that was a futile effort. He’d asked the man to watch out for her and this is what he did? Brought her _here_? He thought maybe if he stayed hidden, that they would give up their search for him here and leave again. It would be for the best, for everyone. 

But then Felicity had stepped on that landmine and Oliver knew he was the only one who could save her. It wasn’t even a question, really. There was no choice to make when it came to her. 

Now, he was leading them back to the place he called home these days. Not because he wanted to, but because his hands were tied. He had to at least pretend to hear them out, on why they’d come. Even if he had absolutely no intention of returning with them. 

He entered the clearing that sat before the bombed out fuselage and headed right towards the opening. It was overgrown with vines and ferns, almost blending into the jungle around it, but it provided much welcome protection from the elements. Plus, it was home. He’d stayed here for most of his time on the island, save for the year he’d been in Reiter’s employ and it felt familiar. It lacked happy memories but that was par for the course for him these last six years. 

Oliver had one really happy memory that he was hoping against all hope would remain untainted. That night he’d spent in Felicity’s arms. He’d left, hoping to keep that memory pristine but now she was here and the real world was going to press in on him, whether he wanted it to or not. Then, that memory too would be destroyed. Just like everything else. 

Felicity entered the fuselage behind him and he glanced at her to see her checking everything out. “Is this where you lived when you were here? I mean, the first time you were here?” she asked. 

“For some of it,” he said shortly. 

Dig was watching him carefully and Oliver could tell the other man didn’t expect much from him. Which was good but it didn’t explain why he’d let Felicity come here. 

He focused on putting away his bow and quiver in the meantime, keeping his back to his friends, trying to steady his resolve. 

“You could at least pretend like you’re happy to see us,” Felicity said accusingly. She sounded frustrated and hurt and while he wanted to reassure her, he knew that wouldn’t be what was best for her. 

“I didn’t expect to see either of you again.”He remained facing away, pulling a shirt out of the bag he’d brought here with him and pulling it over his head. 

“I spent weeks tracking you down. I had to talk Dig into even letting me come after you,” she went on. 

“That’s true. I tried to tell her you wouldn’t want her to,” Dig interjected. Oliver turned in time to see Felicity give him a dark look. 

“We both traveled halfway around the world,” she pressed on, “and this morning, we flew in a plane so old that I’m pretty sure I was safer once we jumped out of it.”

He stared at her, stonily.Her eyes crackled with annoyance. 

“You could at least offer us a water,” she snapped. “Or… a coconut?”

He turned away to get his canteen for her, the one he’d filled just that morning and let himself smile a little. That was the girl he’d missed so much while he was here. She had this uncanny ability to make him smile, even when that’s the last thing on earth he felt like doing. 

He turned back to her and handed her the canteen, enjoying her surprised reaction. “Sorry, fresh out of coconuts,” he explained. “I _am_ happy to see you.”

She harumphed softly but smiled a little as she unscrewed the lid and took a long drink. He tore his eyes away from her so he wouldn’t stare at the way her throat worked as she swallowed. Dig was still watching him warily. 

“I know why you guys are here. And I’m telling you right now, I’m not coming back to Starling City. I can’t,” he told him. “My mission, my father’s list, it was all a fool’s crusade, and I failed. Malcolm Merlyn destroyed the Glades.” He shifted his glance back to Felicity to see her watching him somberly. “Laurel died. And the Hood couldn’t stop it. So please, don’t ask me to put it on again. Ever.”

“This isn’t about you being the Vigilante,” Dig said. “This is about you being Oliver Queen.”

That got his attention. He’d been so sure they wanted him back to the mission, trying to save the city. “What do you mean?” he asked. 

“Your mother is in prison, Oliver,” Felicity explained. “Her trial is coming up. Thea is on her own right now, she’s scared and she’s hurt. She needs you there to help support her through this. It’s not easy having the last name Queen in that city right now and she’s bearing the brunt of it, all on her own.”

Oliver’s heart twisted. His baby sister. He never wanted to leave her vulnerable like that. But how much good could he do her? Wouldn’t the danger he’d bring into her life be far worse than any support he could give her? 

“The family business needs you too,” Felicity went on and Oliver was stunned yet again. “All the bad press after the Undertaking left QC ripe for a hostile takeover by Stellmoor International. I did a little research and found out they’ve gutted every single company they’ve taken over and they have their eyes on Queen Consolidated as we speak. Once they gobble up QC, 30,000 citizens of Starling City will be out of a job, including one very blonde IT expert. According to the board, the only thing that can put off this takeover, is a Queen back at the helm.”

Oliver felt his conviction slipping a little. Dig caught his eye. “Listen, man, I get why you had to leave, probably better than anyone else. I’ve been there. You know I have. After what happened in May, nobody can blame you for leaving. But it’s time for you to come home.”

He’d been so certain. When he’d left Starling and when he’d seen them land on the beach that morning; he was _not_ returning home. But hearing how his family needed him, how his father’s legacy in that business needed him, all those employees… His resolve wavered. But then he’d remember all the pain and suffering he’d brought back with him from the island in the first place. He couldn’t do that again to his family or anyone else. They might suffer in the meantime, but in the long run, they’d be a lot better off without him. _Felicity_ would be better off without him. He’d ruined their friendship and if he returned, he would only ruin her as well. 

Felicity seemed to sense the direction of his thoughts and she turned to Diggle. Oliver watched her place a hand on his arm. “Can you give us a few minutes to talk?” she asked. 

Dig’s eyes slid to Oliver and in that instant, he knew that the other man knew about what happened with him and Felicity in that cabin. She must have told him. There was a world of warning in Diggle’s heavy stare, telling him to be careful with Felicity’s heart. But didn’t Dig realize that keeping her away from him was the best way to do that? 

Finally, Diggle nodded. “I’ll head to the airstrip and radio for pickup,” he said. 

Oliver pointed over his shoulder. “The airstrip is north of here, about a twenty minute hike. You’ll cross a stream before you get there but you can’t miss it.” 

“Got it.” Dig ducked out into the afternoon sunshine.

And with that, Oliver and Felicity were alone. 

***

Felicity knew that Oliver was fighting the idea of coming back to Starling. But she’d come a long way; she wasn’t about to back down without a fight. No disrespect to Diggle, but she knew she had the ability to sway him on this. But she needed to make sure that the thing that was holding him back wasn’t, in fact, _her_. 

Being alone with Oliver for the first time in five months was a hell of a lot more awkward than she’d been anticipating. He was going to great lengths to avoid looking her in the eye. He moved around the space, picking things up and she realized he was clearing a spot for her to sit. That was kind of… sweet, actually. 

The fuselage wasn’t much. There was an army cot in one corner. Several crates acted as tables and chairs. It was very much about utility over comfort. Her heart went out to Oliver, having lived here, alone, for so long. He deserved more than this. Couldn’t he see that? 

“Here,” he said, gruffly, indicating the spot he’d cleared for her. 

“Thanks,” she replied, having a seat. She was a bit sore, probably from her adventure with the landmine. She wasn’t sure her heart rate had quite come down from that just yet. 

He stopped, facing away from her, a few paces away. She could see the tight set of his shoulders underneath his t-shirt. He was clearly waiting for her to start talking but she suddenly didn’t know where to begin. 

“Uh… Thea is helping Tommy out with Verdant,” she told him after a few moments. “They’re running the place together. He opens and she closes. She seems to really like it, it’s been keeping her busy.”

“Is she happy?” Oliver asked quietly. 

“Well… as I told you before, things are hard for her right now. I’ve talked to her a few times, about you, about QC. She misses you. And she’s upset about your mother.”

He turned to her, his brow furrowed. “Upset about her? Why? Is my mom okay?”

“I— I don’t really know. I haven’t gone to see her and she’d probably wonder why I was since she doesn’t really know me. But I know Thea hasn’t gone to see her either. I think she’s still torn up about the Undertaking and your mom’s part in that. She’s confused and upset and basically doesn’t have anyone to talk to besides Roy and, occasionally, Tommy and I.”

Oliver bit his lip and she could see that he felt conflicted. “She’s better off safe from the danger that follows me around.”

Felicity fought the urge to roll her eyes. “Oliver, don’t be so dramatic. For one thing, we’re there. Helping you. And we’ll help her too. You can’t run from your life just because you’re afraid.”

He clearly didn’t like that response, judging by the dark look that crossed his features. He turned away again. Felicity sighed and tried again. 

“Tommy is doing better. He was quite a mess after the Undertaking, and then he had a lot on his shoulders with Merlyn Global. If the Queen name is a liability in Starling right now, can you imagine the _Merlyn_ name? But he’s really fought through it and I’m so proud of him. He’s doing a great job as CEO and I’ve even got him back to where he’s joking and charming again.”

Oliver turned his profile towards her, his eyes sliding to her. “You guys have become friends?”

She nodded. “We have drinks and commiserate about our troubles all the time. He tried to shut me out at first, but as you know, that doesn’t really work on me.”

He scoffed and shook his head. “Tell me about it.”

“He misses you. Tommy does. He doesn’t like to admit it but I know he does. He’s still a bit angry with you, but I think he’s ready to talk to you. You know, whenever you’re ready too.”

Oliver just hummed in acknowledgement. 

Felicity was getting frustrated. Might as well bite the bullet and get it over with. “But there’s something else we should probably talk about.” 

She saw Oliver’s shoulders tighten again. 

“I’m hoping part of the reason you want to stay here so badly isn’t because of what happened between us.”Felicity held her breath, hoping that she hadn’t pushed too hard. But it was becoming clear that putting off talking about this wasn’t doing either of them any favors. She missed their old, easy camaraderie. 

Oliver sighed and finally turned to face her. His expression was about what she’d expected; brooding and pensive. He sat down on the crate next to her, resting his elbows on his knees as he leaned forward. He spoke to his hands, clasped in front of him. “I’m afraid I ruined our friendship that night, Felicity. We can’t go back to what we were before.” 

“Oliver… I was there too, it wasn’t just you in that cabin. I made my own decisions that night.”

“I should have done something, stopped it, walked away, left… I don’t know.”

Felicity felt a pang in her chest, her heart aching a little. It seemed her feelings for Oliver remained frustratingly one-sided. She’d been afraid of this, while also expecting it. There’d been a small part of her, due to Tommy’s encouragement no doubt, that had hoped that maybe Oliver felt something beyond just friendship for her. She was disappointed, already feeling a little heartsick at the loss of those dreams she’d kept hidden in her heart, but hardly surprised. Well, the answer was to push those feelings down and make sure that Oliver understood that their friendship could indeed withstand this. 

“Oliver, we can still be friends. I promise, what happened at that cabin… it doesn’t need to ruin anything. We can—“ She swallowed hard. _You can do this, Smoak_. “We can just pretend it didn’t happen.”

Oliver looked unsure. “I don’t know. I ruin everything I touch, Felicity. I don’t want to ruin you too.”

“You _haven’t_ ,” she assured him. “And you won’t because you don’t. Listen, I know we haven’t really been friends outside of our…work. We don’t have movie nights or meet for drinks or chat on the phone. But I know you have my back and you know I have yours.”

His expression lightened fractionally. “Yeah…”

“So we can be kind of friends? If you want.” 

_What are you doing, Smoak??_

“I mean, no pressure, but I do have a rather impressive Netflix queue.” 

_ABORT! ABORT!_

Oliver smiled. “I’d like that. Do you think we can? It won’t be too weird?”

“No, of course not,” she promised. 

_Liar!_

“Felicity… I’m so sorry. You came to that cabin to take care of me and get me on my feet and I—“

She held up a hand. Her heart was literally cracking inside her chest and she could feel the devastation starting to radiate through her. “It’s okay. Really. I promise.”

_You suck at this_. 

Oliver blew out a breath. “I’m so glad, Felicity. I need you. If I’m going back to Starling—“

“You’re going back?” she cried. 

“—Then I’m going to need your help. With my mom’s trial, with Thea, with Queen Consolidated.”

“And you’ll have it,” she promised. 

He stood up, pulling her to her feet. He shook his head but he was still smiling. “I don’t know how you do it.” 

“It’s a talent,” she agreed. 

He pulled her into a hug and she couldn’t resist burying her nose in his chest and inhaling the sweaty, earthy, perfect scent of him. 

_You’re so screwed. I’m out._

Her better sense was clearly furious with her for promising this man things she had no business promising him. But she justified it, as she hugged him tighter, that it was worth anything to bring him back home. 

***

By the time Dig made it back to the fuselage, it was getting dark so Oliver recruited him to help gather some firewood. He explained that most nights he didn’t have a fire, didn’t need one. He tended to eat his big meal in the middle of the day and it’d been a warmer summer than usual on Lian Yu so he hadn’t needed the warmth at night. 

But since Felicity and Dig were here and it was only for the night and they’d brought enough food with them for them all to eat both dinner and a quick breakfast in the morning before the plane arrived to pick them up. He wanted them to be comfortable; or as comfortable as a person could be on this hellish island.So the three of them had sat around the crackling fire, eating the provisions and talking about not much of anything at all. Felicity filled Oliver in on some of the news and pop culture happenings from the last five months and Dig remained mostly silent and observant. It was a little awkward, but only because things were still left unsaid and he knew Dig had questions. In the meantime, Oliver tried to focus on Felicity and what she was saying. 

He felt so relieved after his conversation with her. He’d spent the last five months worrying that he’d done something terrible and unforgivable. Felicity was better than a one night stand but he’d treated her that way anyhow. Even worse, he’d _enjoyed_ it. He’d carried that shame with him for these last five months, knowing he’d done a despicable thing when he was weak and that he’d taken so much pleasure from it. 

Oliver’d had dreams every night that he was able to sleep on the island. Sometimes, the dreams were nightmares. Visions of what had happened to Laurel and his own part in her terrible and tragic death. Tommy’s disappointed and horrified expression when he learned his secret. His mother, being arrested on live television. The Glades, shattering and falling to dust and him, helpless to stop it. 

But when he wasn’t plagued with nightmares, he dreamed about Felicity. And, surprising to him, those dreams had been much more frequent. Instead of waking up in a cold sweat, he woke up in a hot sweat, yearning for the feel of her body against his. He remembered every moment of their night together and he relived every second of it. Then, after a few months, he started imagining moments they _hadn’t_ shared, things he wished he’d done. Things he still wanted to do. 

Oliver bit the inside of his cheek; he couldn’t entertain those thoughts anymore. He shouldn’t have started in the first place, but it’d been so lonely on this island.But Felicity wanted them to be friends, _only_ friends. And it was the only way that he could be around her. So Oliver focused on reminding himself of this vow as he helped Dig prepare a couple of sleep rolls for them to use as beds for the night. He was giving Felicity his cot, no arguments allowed.

“Is there a spring or something nearby?” Felicity asked. “I could stand to wash off before going to sleep.”

Oliver struggled to keep the visions of Felicity, bare and beautiful, bathing in the pond that he used to clean himself, the moonlight shining down on her soft curves. He got to his feet. “Yes, there’s a pond about 200 feet in that direction,” he said, pointing. “Here, let me get you a flashlight and some soap and a towel.”

“Oh, you don’t have to—“ 

“Felicity. It’s fine.” He pushed the items into her arms. “Be careful. There aren’t too many large wild animals on this island. A man I was with told me there were wolves here years ago but I never saw any so I think he was pulling my leg. The biggest I’ve seen are wild boar, and they can be dangerous but don’t bother them and they won’t bother you. And they mostly sleep at night.”

Felicity’s eyes were wide but she nodded. “Okay.Well, uh, I won’t be long.” 

She gave him and Dig a little wave before she headed outside, shining the flashlight ahead of her. Oliver watched after her until she was gone from sight and then turned to see Dig watching him. 

“What?” he asked as he continued prepping the bedroll he intended to sleep on. 

“Are we gonna talk about this?” Dig asked him, sitting back on his heels. 

“Talk about what?”

“You and Felicity. What did she tell you earlier to make you change your mind?” 

Oliver grit his teeth together. “If she wanted to be alone to talk to me, don’t you think that means she doesn’t want you to know what she said?”

“Probably. Okay, then how’s this gonna be with you two from now? Tension all the time? Are you going to be a couple? What can I expect?”

Irritation rose in him like a wave of nausea. “So you _do_ know what happened at the cabin before I left.”

“Felicity told me,” Dig admitted. “I wanted her to tell me, and it was pretty much what I expected to hear.”

“You expected that I slept with Felicity?” Oliver asked incredulously. 

Dig shrugged. “The way she was acting after that all went down, how she’d flinch when I brought up your name… I just had a feeling.”

Guilt washed over him. “Dig, I— I made a mistake.”

His friend blew out a long breath and returned to working on his own bedroll. “So you’re saying it won’t happen again?”

“It won’t happen again.”

“You’re okay with this? And you talked about this with Felicity?” 

Oliver rolled his shoulders. “Yes. And yes. It’s fine, Dig.” 

He made a noise that sounded a lot like a snort. “If you say so.”

***

Dig waited until Oliver left to do his own washing up before trying to talk to Felicity. He felt a bit like a relationship counselor. Because while Oliver insisted he was not putting the hood on again ever, Dig knew that eventually, the team would be needed and Oliver would answer the call. He wouldn’t be able to stop himself. Helping people was in his blood now, and despite his intentions right now, he wouldn’t be able to ignore it forever. 

But this meant that the team needed to be able to work together when that time came. And Diggle worried that if there was tension between these two that their teamwork would break down. And not just that… he was worried about them because they were his friends. Oliver’s reactions when they talked earlier had been very telling. The way Felicity had been reacting all summer to discussions about Oliver and the Undertaking were mirrored almost perfectly in Oliver. 

Oliver had said that Felicity was fine with leaving what happened between them in the past, but he’d also said that he was fine with it too and Dig could clearly see that wasn’t the case. He was hardly a romance expert of any kind, but Dig considered himself something of an expert on Oliver and Felicity. And there was no mistaking what Oliver’s body language was screaming when he was around the young blonde. The same went for Felicity. What scared Dig more than anything, was his two friends hurting each other, especially if neither of them meant to. And he would be smack in the middle of it. 

So as soon as Oliver took the towel and soap out to the pond, Dig approached Felicity. She was sitting on the cot, combing out her hair. She smiled up at him but he noticed it was a wobbly smile. He couldn’t fault her that; it’d been a long day for both of them and he hadn’t even stepped on an active landmine. 

“Can I sit?” he asked, gesturing the spot next to her on the cot. 

She nodded and gave him a softer, more genuine smile. 

“How are you doing?” he asked first. 

“Tired,” she admitted. “It’s all catching up with me right now. 

“I get that. Still, you were right. You found him, you came here, and you got him to agree to come back to Starling. You did that.”

“You helped.”

“I just came along for the ride. It was all you, Felicity.”

She blushed a little, but she was smiling. “I’m just glad it worked.”

“Are you going to be okay though? With him?”

He watched as Felicity bit her lip. “Yeah, it’s gonna be fine. I assured him that our friendship is still intact.”

“And you both agreed it won’t happen again?” Dig prompted. 

Her eyes slid away from his. “Yeah. Plus, I mean, it doesn’t have to mean anything, right?” she asked him, shrugging a shoulder. 

_Shit_. “Unless it does mean something, to either of you or both of you,” he said, pointedly.

“Dig…”

“Listen Felicity, we’ve talked about this. I know about your feelings for him.”

Her eyes widened. “But you didn’t tell him—?”

“Relax. No, I didn’t. And I’m pretty sure he has feelings for you.”

She snorted bitterly and it made him sad to hear it. “That’s where you’re wrong. He was so upset over sleeping with me that the only way he could consider returning to Starling was me promising that we can still be friends and just forget what happened.”

Dig sighed. It was even worse than he thought. “Felicity, I don’t want you to put yourself in a position that is potentially upsetting for you, maybe even on a daily basis.”

“I’m a big girl, Dig. I can handle this, I promise. I wouldn’t have told Oliver that if I couldn’t.”

He knew it wasn’t as simple as that. He had experience with this, that neither of his friends knew about. He could probably make himself blue in the face, lecturing her and Oliver both on the subject but he recognized that at some point, he had to stand back and let them deal with it themselves. He was their friend, not their parent. 

“Okay. I believe you,” he told her. “But promise me one thing.”

“Lay it on me,” Felicity said, relaxing visibly. 

“If it’s getting to be too much or you’re having a rough day or you just need to vent, then let me know, okay? I’m always available for you. We can have another movie night if you want.”

Her eyes lit up. “Really?”

“Really. Just… no Nicholas Sparks movies.”

She laughed and he was so glad to hear that happy, light sound. She needed to laugh more, especially with Oliver returning. Dig vowed to see to it personally. 

“And if you need to walk away, at any time, you do it. I’ll back you up.”

“Dig…”

“Just putting it out there.”

She smiled at him, but it was sad expression. “Thanks, Dig.”

Oliver returned after that, so they all busied themselves with getting ready for sleep. Oliver left the fire crackling while they settled in.Soon, they were all tucked into their bed rolls (or, in Felicity’s case, the cot) and ready for sleep. 

“Oliver?” Felicity’s voice was tentative and quiet in the near dark. 

“Yes, Felicity?” he answered. 

“Are there any snakes on this island?”

Dig and Oliver both laughed. He’d been expecting something else from her altogether. 

“Sorry, Felicity, there are. But they’ll stay away from us, especially with the fire still going.”

“Okay.”There was a long, quiet pause. Then, “What about when the fire goes out?”

Dig grinned up at the dark ceiling the fuselage provided. That was his girl. 

“Then don’t let your arms get outside your blankets,” Dig suggested. 

“Dig!” she cried, indignant. 

Oliver chuckled. “It’ll be fine, Felicity. You’re too big to be dinner.”

“That’s not very encouraging,” she grumbled. 

“Don’t worry, we’ll protect you,” Dig promised. “Right, Oliver?”

The air went out of the fuselage then, all of them holding their breath. But Dig wanted Oliver to understand that he was aware of the tension, that he was looking out for both of them. He didn’t have to wait very long at all for Oliver’s reply. 

“Of course.” 

Very matter of fact. Dig smirked to himself. That’s what he’d thought. 

They all fell quiet again and Dig thought it was because his companions were falling asleep. He let his eyes drift closed as well, letting the sound of the fire crackling as well as the wilderness around them lull him to sleep. Just before he drifted off, he heard Felicity speak up again, though even quieter this time, just above a whisper. 

“Oliver?”

“Yeah?”

“I’m glad you’re coming back.”

There was a long pause.Dig sighed in relief as he let sleep finally overtake him. Just before he drifted off, he heard Oliver reply, “I’m glad too.”

They were going to be just fine. 


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oliver is back in Starling and back in the hood, but things between him and Felicity are far from fine. In fact, Felicity has just about had it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter has a LOT going on. We go from 2x01-2x05. It's a lot of ground to cover and a lot of emotions are swirling under the surface, especially for poor Felicity. The girl is at her breaking point. 
> 
> Thank you all for your lovely reaction to this fic! I'm really glad people are enjoying it! It's a pretty steady ride from here into the finish... this story finishes up shortly after the canon events of 2x07, in case you were wondering how far into s2 I go (and from some of the comments I've gotten, I know some of you have been wondering). 
> 
> Once again, thank you to fistis who provided me with the lovely fanart you see below. And a huge thank you to the-silverforked-sky for her beta work. She worked a lot with me on this chapter, wanting to get Felicity's feelings and voice just right. She's a great advocate for Felicity in this story, you guys. Just wait'll you see chapter 12! LOL!

Felicity sat at the bar at Verdant, sipping at a margarita and feeling generally unenthusiastic about it. It’d been a confusing night.Well, more confusing than usual. And it was getting rather alarming what she considered usual these days. So far, since Oliver had been back home in Starling, she’d been in one hostage crisis, jumped out of one high-rise office window, been kidnapped by a psychopathic serial killer and now, after tonight, she could add “witnessed a woman return from the dead” to that list. The first two she could wave off, the third was giving her some post-traumatic stress (regardless what she’d told Oliver after he’d rescued her from Barton Mathis), and the last one was utterly scrambling her brain. 

As Dig had predicted, Oliver had indeed put the hood back on after returning to Starling. It hadn’t even taken as long as she’d expected either. She’d bet Dig that it’d take a week before Oliver went back to vigilante work. It ended up being a _day_. A single day back in Starling and he was putting on the hood. It turns out, he had a good reason. Thea was taken by the same copycat vigilantes who’d tried to take them hostage at QC earlier that day and that was all the reason Oliver needed to get back in the hero business. 

He didn’t want to be “The Hood” anymore. Because of Laurel and what she’d thought about The Hood and vigilantism in general, Oliver decided that he was no longer going to kill. He found another way, and preferred to be called “The Arrow” instead. Felicity was so proud of him, she thought her heart might burst. He’d found another way, a way to make this passion and mission to save the city _work_. It was more than just dropping bodies and checking names off a list. It was about helping people, which is what he really wanted to do. 

He’d also found another way when it came to helping out QC. Isabel Rochev, Stellmoor's VP of Acquisitions, had sailed into QC the day Oliver returned, ready to take over. But Oliver wasn’t going to make it easy on her and the board was impressed by his commitment to leading the ailing company back from the brink. At first, Isabel had pointed out that Oliver didn’t have the ability, even with the board’s support, to save his company because he didn’t own a majority of shares. After a visit to his mother at Iron Heights, Oliver contacted Walter at Starling National Bank and he was more than happy to help Oliver out with purchasing the remaining shares of QC stock. 

The downside of that was that now Isabel was basically running QC alongside Oliver, waiting for him to goof up so she could swoop in and take the company. Her dogged determination was more than a little disheartening. And it was probably why Felicity had come in to work a few days later only to find out she was no longer a technician in the IT Department. She had been promoted to Executive Assistant to the CEO. 

Betty Rodgers, the human resources associate who informed her of her new position, seemed to think this was news to congratulate her for. Felicity did not agree.While the _steep_ bump in pay was fairly attractive, being Oliver’s _secretary_ was not in Felicity’s five year plan. She’d unloaded on him, furious and hurt and indignant.And while she saw his point when he tried to explain, that he needed her close for Arrow business reasons, she still was upset at what she saw as a demotion and a separation from where her true skills lie. 

It only took a few days for the real problem to arise: the gossip at QC. Everyone in her old department was gossiping that she’d gotten this job on her knees and all the other secretaries on the executive floors despised her for essentially stealing their opportunity. Then there were all the women (and a few men) who had their eye on Oliver Queen who were just flat out jealous. Felicity finally just stopped going into the break room and instead used the refrigerator in Oliver’s office to store her lunch each day. 

When she complained to Dig about it, he suggested she tell Oliver what was going on. Felicity was loathe to do that, though. For one thing, she sort of _had_ gotten the job by sleeping with the boss. Okay, okay, so she knew that wasn’t the reason he’d hired her as his assistant, she couldn’t help but admit to herself that she couldn’t exactly refute those rumors because she _had_ slept with the boss. Then there was the fact that she didn’t want him to have to fight her battles for her. It was just gossip, something she was used to from her high school days in Las Vegas, and she could handle it. It was just frustrating, that was all. 

The whole thing had left Felicity with a desire to assert her own autonomy. Which could be why she’d volunteered herself as bait when Barton Mathis, aka “The Dollmaker” started terrorizing the city again. He’d apparently been bad news years before, while Oliver was still on Lian Yu, and Detective Lance had been the one to put him away. But, the Undertaking had damaged a section of Iron Heights prison and several inmates had gotten loose, including Barton Mathis. 

Mathis was targeting young women and Felicity was able to figure out that all his victims used the same exclusive face cream. So she’d offered herself as bait, to go buy this face cream and put herself on his radar. Oliver had tried to fight her on it, but Felicity was determined. Mathis was a serious threat and she didn’t want to see one more young woman show up, posed as a porcelain doll. Not if she could do something to help stop him once and for all. 

Mathis hadn’t taken her bait the night she purchased the face cream, which was both maddening and disappointing. She’d had Diggle, Lance and Oliver all keeping a close eye on her so she’d been essentially safe. But, back at the foundry, they’d all agreed that if he’d been watching, Mathis probably had been scared off by the public nature. Sure enough, the next night, Felicity had been grabbed coming out of work at QC. He’d taken her right there in the QC parking garage. It was lucky for her that Dig and Oliver were expecting her right away at the foundry and were on high alert when she didn’t show up. 

When Felicity had insisted on being the bait, Oliver had insisted on putting a tracker in her industrial piercing. She couldn’t argue with the logic at the time and when she was taken, she was glad for it. Mathis had no sooner had her strapped to a frame in his hideout than Oliver arrived with Dig providing backup. Her two teammates easily subdued Mathis until Lance could arrive to arrest him. 

Oliver’s hands had trembled as he freed her, his features pale, but Felicity had assured him that she was fine. A little shaken but no worse for the wear. She was just glad they’d caught the guy. He’d offered to drive her home, sleep on her couch, but she’d told him that she could take care of herself. She’d sort of regretted that afterwards when she was unable to sleep the whole night, memories of Mathis and what’d he’d hoped to do with her filling her mind. Sleep was absolutely not happening. But the good news was she was able to hide the bags under her eyes from Oliver at QC the next morning. 

Felicity thought she’d done rather well at putting the incident behind her. But then the sightings of the woman in black leather had increased dramatically and Oliver had been intent on finding out who it was. He was rather territorial about Starling and believed he was the only vigilante that should be running around the streets. It wasn’t until Felicity noticed that this woman seemed to be following Quentin Lance around that they had any sort of lead. All Oliver had to do was stake out Lance and wait for the woman to appear, which she did, eventually. 

He chased her, restrained her and then learned that she was Sara Lance, Laurel’s younger sister whom Oliver was absolutely certain he’d seen die five years before. That’s when the whole story came out: Sara hadn’t died when the yacht went down in rough seas like he’d told everyone. She appeared a year later, on board a freighter that had come to Lian Yu and taken Oliver prisoner. But he swore up and down to both her and Dig that he’d seen Sara die later that year. He’d been sure and he had let her family believe Sara died, painlessly, in the sinking of Gambit because he believed that was kinder than the truth. 

All of this threw Felicity for a loop. She met Sara and found she liked the woman. Felicity hadn't known Laurel very well, her impression of her mostly built from what Oliver and Tommy had told her, but Sara seemed different from Laurel, at least _before_ the Gambit. Now, she clearly had a boatload of issues. Issues that Oliver had wrapped himself up in immediately. Felicity tried to tell herself that she wasn’t jealous but the fact of the matter was, once Sara had been revealed, he’d barely noticed anything or anyone else. It made her feel petty and small to be upset about this and Felicity hated feeling petty and small.

So she’d come into the club for a drink. Or two. Or three. At first, she told herself it was so she could blow off some steam. But now she was starting to think she was drinking to forget. And it wasn’t just getting grabbed by a serial killer or Oliver’s ex-hookup returning from the dead that she wanted to forget. 

Three drinks in, Felicity was able to finally admit to herself that the reason she was so upset was because of the status of things between her and Oliver. She spent most of her day with him, every day, working in such close proximity. Even with Dig present as he was most of the time they were at QC and all of the time they were at the foundry, Felicity still felt tension between them. She was still fairly certain it was one-sided because Oliver was as unaffected as he ever was around her. And now, with Sara here, he barely even acknowledged her at all.

Felicity, on the other hand, noticed every look, every touch, every remark he made. And she couldn’t make herself stop doing it. It was considerably more difficult than she’d expected not to remember those moments they’d spent in each other’s arms. She’d remember the most intimate moments at the most inopportune times. Like when they were at QC and he was standing at her desk, requesting she send off some emails. She’d look up and see how he had his suit coat off and his shirtsleeves rolled up, his tie loosened. It was a breathtaking look on him, emphasizing his strong arms and she’d remember the way those same arms held her close as he thrust into her, driving her pleasure higher and higher. 

Or there was when she’d watch him sparring with Dig, his shirt off and sweat beading on his muscles and she’d remember how she kissed along his scars, tasting the sweat that lingered on his skin after their latest round of love making and how he’d made the most beautiful sound as she’d licked around his nipple, a groan that echoed in her ears for weeks and months to come. 

If she wanted to be honest with herself, she was feeling more sexually frustrated than she ever had in her life and it had nothing to do with the length of time between now and the last time she got laid. She’d gone longer than six months before. A _lot_ longer. But the combination of being around Oliver’s general _hotness_ all day plus the memories of that scorching night they’d spent together in addition to Sara’s reappearance were driving her absolutely batty. 

So she was sitting here at Verdant, nursing her third margarita, and trying not to think of the clusterfuck her life had become. 

“Hey, gorgeous. What are you still doing here?” Tommy’s familiar voice interrupted her thoughts. “I thought you guys packed it in for the night.”

“We did,” she said. “But I… wanted a drink.” 

Tommy looked at her carefully. “You wanna talk about it?” he asked. 

“Do you want to talk about why you still haven’t talked to Oliver yet?” Turning the tables was a little mean, but she was three drinks in and not in the mood for the third degree, even from Tommy. 

He winced. “Okay, point taken. But is it okay if I assume the reason for your ennui is based on the same person that I’m trying to avoid as long as possible?”

Felicity didn’t answer, but instead took a bigger gulp of her margarita. 

“Okay, that’s definitely a yes,” he said. “But I won’t press because I’m not an asshole.”

She smiled, her shoulders relaxing. “Tommy, you’re the best.”

“Those are just rumors, Smoak.” He winked at her. “What do you say I give you a ride home? I have a policy against letting girls who’ve drunk three margaritas go home alone.”

Felicity couldn’t hide her snort. “Is that a line? Cuz it needs some work.”

“Yeah, just a bit. But thanks for letting me try it out on you.”

She drained the rest of her drink and then took Tommy’s arm. “Lead the way, kind sir,” she said. She didn’t know why she’d ended up at Verdant that night but apparently she subconsciously needed Tommy Merlyn.

***

Oliver was cleaning things up in the foundry about a week after Sara showed back up again. He was still reeling from the discovery that she was alive and well and running around Starling dressed in black leather, beating up men who attacked women. When the team had begun noticing this new vigilante in town and trying to track her down, Oliver had never in a million years thought that it might be _Sara_. 

She was scared that he’d go to her family and he’d promised her that he wouldn’t. It wasn’t his secret to tell and he knew all about respecting that. But he still thought that she should go see her father. Quentin was hurting badly since losing Laurel and knowing that he still had a daughter alive might help pull the poor man out of the hole he’d been in the last six months. Sara had promised to think about it before disappearing into the night yet again. 

He’d been in turmoil since he found Sara. Seeing her had plunged him back into his memories from the island, from that terrible year when his friend had turned on him and Oliver had lost Shado and then Sara… again. Or so he’d thought. His mind was reeling and he honestly didn’t know what to do next. How could he keep moving with the weight of his past pressing him down like this?

“Hey, buddy.” 

Oliver looked up sharply, shocked. “Tommy?” 

His former best friend was standing at the bottom of the foundry stairs, smiling awkwardly with his hands shoved into his jeans pockets. 

On Felicity’s advice, he’d held off on going to see Tommy himself. He’d slipped up and tried once, shortly after his return from Lian Yu, but Felicity had seemed to anticipate him without him having to say a word. She’d just given him a _look_ , and shook her head. It irritated him that she could read him so well and he’d glared back at her. She’d explained that Tommy needed some time still and that he’d find him when he was ready. As much as he wanted to ignore her advice, Oliver knew Felicity was right about this. She was right about most things, actually. 

Still, he hadn’t expected him now, here, tonight. 

“Yep, in the flesh.”

“C’mon in,” Oliver said, gesturing towards the chairs. He sat in Felicity’s usual seat and watched Tommy cross the space and drop into the seat he usually used when sharpening his arrows. 

“How’ve you been?” Tommy asked. 

Oliver nodded. “All right. It was a rough summer but I’m back now and I’m actually glad I came back. I have Felicity to thank for that, I suppose.”

Tommy smiled. “Yeah, she picked me up this summer too. I was a mess. I was angry and hurt and devastated and just… I don’t know what if I would have done without her there, to be honest.”

“She’s a special woman,” Oliver agreed, his heart twisting a little. More special than he deserved, clearly. 

His friend looked at him for a long moment and then shook his head. “Yeah, she is.Which is why I think you’re making a mistake with her.”

“Excuse me?” 

“Listen, I’m not going to judge what happened between you guys after the Undertaking—“

“Jesus, does everyone know?” Oliver groaned. 

“I pretty much already knew, buddy,” he said. “Felicity was kind of tied up in knots all summer about it. She helped me soothe my aches, so I helped her soothe hers.”

“Oh.” Oliver felt the surge of an unfamiliar emotion. It was a grasping, needy thing that made him simultaneously angry with Tommy and yearning for Felicity in a way he hadn’t felt before. 

“Relax, big guy. I could fall for Felicity in a heartbeat but I’ve sort of promised myself I wouldn’t fall in love with anymore women who are already head over heels in love with my best friend.”

He didn’t know what to say. For one thing, he was happy that Tommy still considered him his best friend. It gave him hope for their friendship, going forward. But the bigger issue was him saying that Felicity was in love with him. 

“She’s not,” Oliver said. “We’ve agreed to be friends and put what happened behind us. It’s the only way we can still work together and I desperately need her. Not just here in the foundry but at QC too.”

Tommy’s forehead wrinkled. “You need a specific IT girl?”

“No, I’ve made Felicity my executive assistant,” Oliver explained. “She didn’t tell you that?”

He watched the other man facepalm and groan. “Oh, Ollie.”

Oliver was starting to feel annoyed. “What?”

“Listen, I know things are still tense between us,” Tommy said, “so I’m not going to say everything that I want to say right now. We still have a lot to talk about. But I just need to say that I think you’re screwing up big time with Felicity.”

He didn’t appreciate the insinuation that Tommy might know Felicity better than he did. “How am I doing that? I’ve valued her friendship, which is what she wanted.”

“I don’t think this is my story to tell. But I will say one thing. No, two things. First; Felicity is no one’s secretary and while I’m sure you think you have a good reason for putting her in that position, just maybe stop for a minute and think about how much this woman values her career and how hard she has worked for her degrees. I tried all summer to bring her over to Merlyn Global, but not to make her my EA. I want her to be my VP of technology. But she was loyal to QC and to _you_ , so don’t you squander that. Second; I just drove her home. I found her upstairs drinking margaritas tonight and she was clearly upset about something. She doesn’t want to talk about it so I’m sure whatever the reason is has to do with you. I might not be her boyfriend, Oliver, but I am her friend and what I saw tonight is a woman who feels hurt so I feel it’s my duty to be upset with you on her behalf.”

“Wait… what? She was drunk upstairs?”

“Not drunk. Barely tipsy. But definitely needing a ride and a friendly shoulder. So my question to you is: what happened today to dim her sunshine?Did you do something?”

“Why do you immediately suspect me?” Oliver asked, feeling a little peeved. 

“Because I can read this girl. And since May and probably before that, she’s been hung up on you whether she wants to admit it or not. Usually not. Also: she wouldn’t tell me about it and lately she has no problem telling me anything as long as it’s not about _you_.”

He sighed. He had a feeling what it might be that had her upset. It was the only thing that had happened today, but it didn’t explain anything. Why would she be upset about Sara’s return? She didn’t even know her. Oliver supposed there was no harm in telling Tommy about it, so long as he didn’t spill the secret. Given that the cops hadn’t come to arrest him for being the vigilante yet, he figured he could trust his old friend. 

“Sara Lance is alive,” he finally said. 

Tommy’s eyes widened. “No shit? What— but _how_? Wait, did you know about this before?”

Oliver shook his head. “I had no idea.”He told Tommy the whole story, from the sinking of the Gambit to finding Sara alive on the freighter. The other man listened, stunned. “That’s amazing!” he said, when he’d finished. “Does Lance know?”

“Not yet. I told her she should tell him but she was… reluctant. She’s afraid he’ll be disappointed at what she’s become.”

“Yeah, but she’s _alive_. If anyone could use that news right now, its Lance.”

“Trust me, I told her the same thing.”

“So, Felicity is upset Sara is alive?” Tommy asked. “That doesn’t sound like her.”

“No, it doesn’t. Plus, I saw them talking, they got along great and Sara really liked her. So it must be something else.”

“Unless…”

“Unless what?”

“She’s jealous.”

Oliver snorted so hard he nearly choked. “You’re joking.”

“Oliver, man, listen. I told you she has feelings for you. This isn’t outside the realm of possibility here.”

“I really don’t think so.”

“Just… talk to her, okay?” Tommy’s eyes were serious. “For me?”

Oliver blew out a breath. Talking to Felicity about anything besides Arrow or QC business these days was a harrowing prospect. He’d never been very good at hiding his feelings and the best way to keep the promise he’d made Felicity about preserving their friendship was to limit their interactions outside of business topics. It was the only way he could be sure he didn’t do or say something to make her uncomfortable. 

But Tommy had a point. He hated the thought of Felicity being upset because of his own thoughtlessness so if there was something he could to do ease that, he’d do it. 

“I’ll try to talk to her,” he promised. 

Tommy smiled. “Thanks, buddy.”

***

Felicity was just getting ready to leave the office and head home for the day. She’d powered down her computers, gathered her things into her purse, put her coffee mug in the sink and cleared the papers off the top of her desk. She was pushing in her chair when Oliver popped out of his office. He looked nervous, unsure and it immediately set her on edge. When he had Arrow business to discuss, he got right to the point and awkwardness was never a thing. The only time he was ever awkward was when discussing _them_. 

_Oh, frack._

“Felicity? Do you have a minute?” he asked. 

“That depends,” she said, hoping she sounded breezy and casual and not as apprehensive as she actually felt. “What’s on your mind?”

“I wanted to talk to you about Sara.” 

_Double frack!_

“Does she need my help with something?” Felicity asking, hoping beyond all hope that this _was_ team related and that she was just reading him all wrong. 

“No… I just— I was worried that maybe there might be some tensions between the two of you.”He rubbed a hand over the back of his neck and he clearly looked as uncomfortable as she felt. 

Irritation bloomed quick and furious. “Why would you even think that??” she demanded. Then, realizing she’d sounded more defensive than she liked, she gentled her tone. “Sara’s great, Oliver. I don’t have a problem with her.” Then, a terrible thought occurred to her. “Unless… does she have a problem with _me_?”

“No! No, no…” Oliver shook his head. “That’s not it. It’s just… I’m a little worried you might be upset if she joined the team, like maybe she would be stepping on your toes, a bit?” 

He sounded so unsure and hesitant and a deep, visceral part of her really wanted to reassure him, comfort him, reach out and put her hand on his arm and set him at ease. But another part of her, the louder and needier part, was already going into self-protection mode. Join the team? Was that actually a possibility? She hadn’t even considered it. Not that she’d mind, per se. She did like Sara and she would be a great asset. Felicity hated to think she was petty and small enough to be concerned about sharing the team with Sara but sometimes a person couldn’t exactly help those sorts of feelings. And why was this on her to deal with anyhow? Why did _she_ have to be the one to make room for Sara? Shouldn’t Sara be told this too? Also, their individual expertise on the team was completely different and if anyone should be receiving this talk it should be Dig. Felicity had to remind herself that maybe the other woman had been talked to about this and perhaps she was blowing all of this way out of proportion. The fact was, Felicity felt out of sorts and she absolutely _hated_ feeling like this. 

The other night she _had_ been feeling a little jealous but not really because of Sara. It was more because of Oliver than anything else. Not that she could tell him that, of course. And really, where did he get the nerve to make these sorts of assumptions about her anyhow? 

“Its fine,” she said, still annoyed. “I promise, my toes are completely un-stepped on.”

“Okay,” he said, sounding only a little relieved. “I just didn’t want you to think that I was overlooking you. Tommy gave me a hard time about making you my EA and—“

“Wait… what?”

“I talked with Tommy yesterday.”

“And you talked about me?” She winced and tried again. “I mean, you talked about making me your EA?”

Oliver nodded, his eyes skating over her shoulder. “Yeah, he pretty much let me know that it was a bad move on my part.”

“It _was_ a bad move,” she pointed out. 

“You said you understood.”

“I do understand, Oliver. That doesn’t mean it didn’t bother me when I first found or that it still bothers me now. But I’m dealing with it because I do understand. I know this isn’t a permanent thing.” 

He relaxed a lot more. “Good. Because I just want you to know that the only reason I promoted you is because I don’t think I can do this without you. You have a much better mind for business than I do.”

And wasn’t that the damn truth. Oliver was great at dealing with people, pressing the flesh and charming investors, but when it came down to actual business, he relied heavily on her recommendations. Which did make her feel better about the position. But it still sucked to be an executive assistant and listen to the rancid whispers behind her back in the break room. 

“Well, I’m glad you recognize that,” she told him, smiling but not feeling it reach her eyes. 

“I don’t want you to worry about your career going forward,” he added. “I’ll take care of you, I promise.”

Felicity bristled at that, going from resigned annoyance to full on ticked off in record time. “You’ll ‘take care of me’? Are you kidding me? Do you even know how patronizing that sounds? Like I need to be handled? And not in a way I appreciate, I assure you,” she blurted and then bit her lips when she realized she’d said that last part out loud. “Listen, Oliver. I want to help you. But you can’t just set up my career for me. I want and am more than capable of earning it on my _own_ , not because of you.Understood?”

“Felicity…”

“Oliver, I’m _serious_. I put up with a lot of crap because I believe in you and in this company and in our… extracurricular activities. I want to help. I want to do what I can. But it’s not easy and it’s not without it’s issues. Like everyone in this building talking about how I got this job on my knees. Or how the great Oliver Queen must be hard up if he’s hitting that with a nerdy IT girl. Or how I look at my degrees from MIT and think, ‘I’m better than this.’ And as difficult as all that nonsense is, I'm dealing with all those feelings pretty well on my own. But the last thing I need in all of this is you promising to smooth things over for me later. That will not actually help in the way you apparently think it will, and will only make things worse.”

He looked chastised but nodded. “I’m sorry—“

Felicity put her hand up, cutting him off. She was at the end of her patience. “No, I’m not really interested in any apologies right now, Oliver. I’m going home.” 

Without a backwards glance, she stormed out of the office but she could feel his eyes on her all the way to the elevator. 

***

Felicity was at the end of her rapidly fraying rope. She strode into Verdant with purpose, but with zero intention of going down to the basement. The boys could just figure out what to do without her tonight. To be perfectly honest, right now she didn’t care what they did. 

She walked right up to the bar and asked the bartender for a shot of tequila, the top shelf stuff. Eyebrow raised, he poured her the shot and watched as she knocked it back. 

“Wow, rough day at work?” Thea asked, appearing at her elbow, as the bartender poured her another. 

“You could say that,” Felicity muttered, knocking back the second shot. Combined with the margaritas she’d had the night before, this was now as much as Felicity had drunk at one time since the night of the Undertaking. Truthfully, she thought maybe she’d set a new record for herself. Why the hell not? 

“Well, don’t let me get in your way,” Thea said. “Pour her another, Jeremy.”

“You sure?” Jeremy looked unsure, glancing between Felicity and his boss. 

“Yes, I’m sure. We’re a bar and we serve booze. So serve the lady.”

Jeremy poured another shot and Thea patted Felicity’s shoulder. “I got you girl,” she murmured into her ear before moving away into the crowd. 

Felicity was eternally grateful as she swallowed the third shot. The burn of alcohol was spreading from her belly and up through her limbs, forcing her muscles which had been tense since her “talk” with Oliver to relax. 

The nerve of that man. The nerve of that man. She’d thought they’d already talked about that whole “promoting her to be his EA” thing but apparently not enough. Felicity understood he felt bad and it was great that he recognized that. But he needed to not manage her or promise he’d fix things. He had a tendency to try to control everyone around him and Felicity was not going to stand for it. 

Storming out of the office probably wasn’t her best moment but she had just hit the limit of her tolerance this week. It wasn’t just Sara, it wasn’t just the EA thing and it wasn’t just the sexual frustration. It was all of that coming to a head and she just desperately needed a break. A night off at the club, blowing off steam, would get that job done rather nicely.

Felicity ordered one more shot. Jeremy poured it for her, albeit reluctantly. She just winked at him and saluted as she swallowed it down. Then, feeling suitably loose and carefree, she turned to consider the dance floor. 

The DJ was in fine form that night, pumping out throbbing dance music that had the crowd gyrating together in a tangled mass of arms and legs. She felt ready to join them tonight, to just let go and feel the beat and let her cares just cease to exist for one night. Even though she was still wearing the blouse and skirt she’d had on at work, she wanted to just let go and feel the music. And, if she was lucky, maybe someone would want to dance with her. Someone who could help her forget that brooding archer who occupied her life and her thoughts. 

Felicity joined the writhing throng and was quickly swept away by the energy of the dancers and the pounding of the music. This… This was what she needed. 

***

Tommy moved through the crowd, pleased to see the club not only at capacity but everyone having a good time. For the first time in maybe forever, he was feeling like a success. Things were getting better at Merlyn Global and Verdant was a runaway hit. He’d love if all the facets of his life could be going as well, but beggars couldn’t be choosers. He had zero hope his family aspects would pick up soon (given he was the last remaining member of his family and he was on unsteady ground with Oliver, the friend that as near to him as any family ever had been) but someday, if he was lucky, his love life would improve. 

Almost as if on cue, he noticed the blonde dancing on the floor with everyone else. There was no mistaking that swishing blonde hair, the tight pencil skirt and high Mary Jane style heels and brightly colored blouse. And, damn, she had _moves_. Tommy couldn’t resist standing back for a moment to watch how she moved to the beat. But then he noticed other people watching her too and his protective hackles went up. 

Telling himself he was doing this for Oliver, Tommy approached Felicity. He settled his hands on her swaying hips which made her jump in surprise and whirl around. When she saw it was him, a big, bright smile spread across her face. 

“Tommy!” She flung her arms around his neck, hugging him. 

He hugged her back, a little alarmed but also amused. She was definitely a little more than tipsy this time. As she giggled in his ear (Giggled! He didn’t know Felicity even knew how to giggle), Tommy began to wonder what had driven her to get this tipsy to begin with. 

“C’mon, let’s sit down,” he suggested, taking her hand and pulling her from the dance floor. 

She pouted dramatically, which was also unlike her. Alarms were going off in his head. “But I want to dance!”

“We’ll dance here in a little bit. First I want to have a drink and chat,” he told her. 

She seemed to perk up at the mention of a drink and let herself be pulled along. 

There was a section of booths that were more private than others that hugged the back wall of the club. A few were reserved and, since he was co-owner, Tommy helped himself to one of them, sliding in next to Felicity. She sank back into the soft leather, looking pleased with herself. 

Tammy, a waitress, came by an instant later. “Good evening, Mr. Merlyn. Can I get you both something from the bar?”

“I’ll have an Old Fashioned, Tammy, please and the lady will have…?”

“Gin and Tonic, please,” Felicity said, only slurring some of the words. 

Tommy gestured for Tammy to lean down and he whispered into her ear, “Can you have Jeremy water it down a bit?” 

“Sure thing, boss,” she agreed with a wink. Then she was gone, leaving them alone. 

“So what brings you here tonight, gorgeous?” 

Felicity sighed. “Long day at work. I needed to blow off steam.”

Hmm. Oliver probably ticked her off, which was surprising given the conversation he’d had with him the night before. “Did something happen with Oliver?” he asked. 

She shrugged and didn’t meet his eye. “Doesn’t matter. I’m here to have fun tonight. I never get to have fun anymore.”

Now _that_ was probably true. Oliver kept her chained up in the basement so much, he didn’t think Felicity had much of a private life outside of work and Oliver. Really, he couldn’t begrudge her this. “Well, I’m glad you chose my gin-joint to have fun at.”

“How are _you_ doing, Tommy? Things any better at work?”

“Yeah, a bit. It’s keeping me busy, but coming here at night helps me shake off the day.”

“That’s why I came here,” she agreed. 

Tammy arrived with their drinks just then so they spent a while sipping and talking. Felicity seemed to even out a bit, not quite as reckless and tipsy, which made him feel relieved. They danced a little, as he’d promised her they would. Tommy reminded himself that he was just looking out for a friend, not to get too attached. It was hard with her, though. He found it too easy to be himself around her, to just have fun. To want more.

After their third round of dancing, they were back in the booth, having another round of drinks. Hers were still being watered down but she was still what he’d call tipsy. It made her rather flirty, which was both a blessing and a curse. 

“Oliver is hanging all over an ex of his and he’s ignoring me,” Felicity finally admitted. 

“Sara?” he asked gently. Felicity’s eyes widened. 

“How did you know?”

He shrugged. “He told me.”

“I heard you guys finally talked! About fucking time, Tommy.”

He shook his head fondly at her. He’d learned in the last few months that Felicity tended to swear a lot more when she drank. “So what else is on your mind?” 

“Okay, so today he tells me that he wants me to be friends with Sara? That he doesn’t want there to be tensions between us if she joins the team? What the hell is that about?”

Okay, that was _not_ what Tommy had urged Oliver to do. 

“I like her, I really do. She’s a great person and, yeah, she’s a cold blooded killer, but she’s also just a person with likes and dislikes, who makes mistakes and feels things… I do like her. I really, really do. I just… don’t know if I can be friends with her. I feel so… _ugh_ around them together. And they’ve just kept it friendly too, no long stares or touches or flirty banter or anything. But still… I don’t know, I think I’m losing my mind,” Felicity said, moaning. 

“You’re not losing your mind. I think it’s natural to feel a little jealous.”

“I’m not jealous!” she insisted. 

Tommy grinned. “No, of course not. Listen, Felicity, Oliver isn’t unaffected by you.”

“You keep saying that, and Dig has said that too and it’s just _bullshit_ because I’m over here dying of sexual frustration and he doesn’t even seem remotely bothered.”

“Now I _know_ that’s not true,” Tommy told her. “It would be impossible. No guy could ever be unaffected by you, Felicity.”

She turned wide eyes on him and Tommy nearly cringed. He probably shouldn’t have said that. He really didn’t want things to get awkward between them. After all, he’d seen first hand what happened to Oliver and Felicity’s friendship when lust and feelings got in the way of things. On the other hand, however, it was the truth and she deserved to know that she was desirable. 

“That sounded like a line, Tommy,” she finally said. 

He swallowed. “Maybe it was.”

He was sitting so close to her, he could probably count her eyelashes. And now she was looking at his mouth, he could tell she was. Her eyes were darker and her tongue darted out to swipe at her own lips. That was what set him off. That’s what had him leaning towards her, his intent clear. He moved slowly, giving her plenty of time to back away or tell him no. 

But she didn’t. 

Instead, she met him halfway. Their lips touched and though Tommy knew this was a monumentally poor idea, he sunk into the kiss, savoring the taste of her lips against his. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't hate me (and Felicity) (and Tommy!) too much! Chapter 10 is a DOOZY and it will be up on Friday!


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Team Arrow heads to Russia to help Dig out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay. So. A few things: 
> 
> 1) I've said this before and this is an unspoken fandom courtesy but I want to spell it out here: I am not looking for constructive criticism with this story or any others. The crit I search for happens during the writing and editing process. I have a beta for this story (the lovely and amazing the-silverforked-sky) who gives me input that is invaluable. (Interestingly enough, the moment she had the biggest problem with in chapter 9 was NOT the kiss, but rather the conversation with Oliver and Felicity... I had to rework that one quite a bit!). When I post a story, it's simply to share with others. I'm not looking for feedback. You can accuse me of not wanting to grow as a writer (as one lovely commenter did), but that's just how I do this.   
> 2) I wrote this story months ago. I finished it in mid-July. Getting reactions to my updates is great and is a lot of fun, but sometimes I feel people are trying to influence me by telling me what should happen next or how I should write my own story. Those comments are frustrating because this story is finished and I'm not going to re-write it because someone didn't agree with my choices. This must be how the Arrow writers feel when people react wildly to spoilers. It's already done. If I had one wish for both the show and fic in general, it would be for people to relax and enjoy the ride before jumping to conclusions and getting negative. And if it's not your thing? Go find something that is.   
> 3) Take care of fic writers. This goes beyond just me. We are unpaid. The only thing we get out of sharing our stories with you guys is a good feeling when we see you've read those stories and enjoy them. Coming into the comments to react negatively not only robs us of that joy, but makes us question doing this at all. A strong fandom has a strong fic community. Please... take care of that community. Encourage fic writers, share your favorite stories, try new authors, and enjoy it. Please.
> 
> On with the show... this chapter is one I was very excited to share with you all. My enthusiasm has been dampened but it is the promised update day and I do hope some of you will appreciate this. If not... oh well. Not much I can do about that. Fair warning: this chapter has smut in it.

Tommy’s lips were on hers and Felicity clutched at the front of his shirt, holding him there for a moment. It felt good, she had to admit. Someone wanted her and it felt like it’d been too long since she’d been able to really have that. It was chaste and sweet and uncomplicated. 

All too soon, however, Tommy was pulling away. He brushed one last kiss over her lips before sitting back. She released him and scooted back a little too, feeling a little off-kilter. 

“Wow,” he breathed. 

“I know. I wholeheartedly echo that sentiment,” she replied, the reality of what they’d just done slamming into her. She’d kissed _Tommy_! Oliver’s best friend! What was she _thinking_?

“I probably shouldn’t have done that,” he said, sounding a little sheepish. “Wait, no, scratch the ‘probably’. I know I shouldn’t have.”

“Tommy… it’s okay,” she assured him. And it was. She knew he didn’t love her, all flirting aside and his admission about having a crush on her. And he knew how she felt about Oliver. The last thing she wanted was for him to feel bad for making her feel better. 

“I promised myself I wouldn’t get involved with someone Oliver was in love with again.”

“Tommy…” Now her voice was warning. She didn’t want him saying things like that when they weren’t true. It wasn’t good for her heart. 

“I’m also through getting involved with women who are in love with Oliver.”

She sighed, knowing she couldn’t really argue that one. Not with him. “I know, Tommy.”

“It’s just… Oliver is my best friend. I’ve known him so long and we’ve had our troubles but I really would like to move past that now. So I can’t be moving in on his girl.”His eyes were soft but she didn’t detect any pain there. Just… the same old friend she’d gotten to know these past months. 

“I still think you’re imagining things. He doesn’t have those kinds of feelings for me,” she insisted. 

“If he doesn’t, he’s the world’s biggest fool.”

“You might be onto something there…” She laughed. Oliver was often a fool about many things, the least of which was her and their “friendship”. 

“I’m serious, though, Felicity. You’re an amazing woman and any man would be lucky to have you. That’s all I wanted you to know tonight. I wanted you to feel that.”

“I do,” she promised him, meaning every word. “And thank you. I really needed it today.”

He looked at her for a long moment, his eyes flashing down to her lips and back up to her eyes several times. He looked thoughtful, maybe a little amused. Finally, he said, “If Oliver hasn’t gotten his head out of his ass by Christmas, come find me.”

Felicity grinned at him. “Oh, really?”

“Yes, really. I mean it.”

“Well, save a dance for me at the New Year’s Eve party then,” she said, enjoying the flirty banter between them. 

“It’s a deal.”

She glanced at the time on her phone before tucking it back into her purse. “I should probably get going. I still have to go back into the office tomorrow morning.”

“You want me to call a cab?” Tommy asked. 

“Yeah, maybe you better. I think the tequila from before is wearing off but I better be safe rather than sorry,” she said. 

“I agree.” 

Tommy walked her outside the club, to where the evening had a chill to the air that spoke of autumn. He hailed her a cab and helped her into the back seat. She rolled down the window and leaned out. 

“Thanks, Tommy Merlyn. You really are the best.”

“It’s my pleasure, Smoak.”

***

The next couple of weeks passed without much incident. Well, again, Felicity had to admit her perspective of “without incident” was probably skewed. The League of Assassins did come to town to take Sara back with them to Nanda Parbat and Team Arrow learned that’s where Sara had been, training and being an assassin after Oliver thought she’d died the second time. But Sara didn’t want to go back and Oliver wanted to protect her. However, the League was pretty tough to get to back off, they had a very strict code of conduct that they apparently were very stringent about, and weren’t above using underhanded methods to get what they wanted. It resulted in Sara going to her father, however, hoping to protect him from the League. Felicity didn’t see the emotional reunion herself but she got tears in her eyes, hearing Sara tell them about it later. 

Ultimately, Sara decided to leave Starling, hoping to keep her father safe from the League. She’d dispatched the assassins sent for her, sending one back to Nanda Parbat to tell Ra’s al Ghul that she wasn’t going to return. Since Ra’s wasn’t likely to take no for answer, leaving was probably the best way to keep Starling from becoming a battleground. Still, though she had struggled with jealousy over Sara’s reappearance, Felicity was sad to see her go. It had been nice having another woman in the foundry for a change and Sara really was a nice person. 

After that, matters at QC took the majority of both her and Oliver’s attention. Isabel Rochev was pushing hard and Oliver needed all the help he could get staying one step ahead of her. Isabel seemed determined to catch him out, but Oliver was just as determined not to let her do just that. 

It was November and the weather was turning chilly when Dig came to them. He was going to Russia. His ARGUS contact had gone missing there while on a mission. Not only was this contact a friend of Dig’s but she had gone there searching for a lead on the whereabouts of Deadshot, whom Dig was still determined to find and bring to justice for killing his brother. The intel wasn’t good… going missing in Russia was still a bad sign, even post-Cold War. Oliver seemed to understand this on a level Felicity couldn’t quite comprehend. 

Oliver suggested he and Felicity travel to Russia under the guise of visiting their Moscow subsidiary, with Dig along as Oliver’s bodyguard, naturally. It was a great plan, really. They would go with Dig and support him as he tried to hunt down his friend who had helped them with cases in the past. Felicity had never met Lyla Michaels, but Dig had always spoken of her with the deepest respect. Anyone who had Dig’s admiration was surely one of the best. 

Of course, nothing could ever go off without a hitch. Just as they had been ready to board the Queen Consolidated jet, Isabel had showed up, luggage in tow. She clearly suspected that Oliver was sleeping with his secretary and was using the company jet for a weekend getaway.Felicity would have been even more insulted if the image Isabel painted wasn’t so enticing. As it was, she was quite insulted because the evil woman clearly didn’t have any respect for Felicity’s skills and saw her as just another blonde bimbo pawing at famed billionaire playboy, Oliver Queen. 

Oliver had no choice but to allow Isabel to accompany them, especially once she revealed she knew they were planning to fly to Moscow. She insisted that if it was QC business, she needed to be involved. Felicity had been planning to kick back in the jet, listen to music on her headphones and catch up on her reading. She wanted to relax, tune out the boys while they talked strategy and maybe even sleep. If there was booze on board, she wasn’t above taking advantage of that. 

With Isabel along, Felicity had to maintain a certain level of professionalism, which really sucked. No kicking back, no booze. The guys couldn’t even talk strategy, which Felicity could tell was frustrating the hell out of them. It all added up to an incredibly tension-filled flight to Russia. Felicity went to sleep eventually just to escape into oblivion for a while. Well, that, and to avoid all the dirty looks Isabel kept tossing her way. Felicity had no idea why the woman had it in so bad for her, though it could have something to do with how Felicity did her best to keep Isabel away from Oliver and only maintained the bare minimum of decorum in her dealings with her. 

Felicity was thrilled to touch down in Moscow, mostly so she could finally escape Isabel’s piercing gaze. So when Oliver told her that he and Dig were going for drinks while Felicity would go with Isabel to the hotel, she’d been furious. Being kept out of their “boys meeting” with Oliver’s old Bratva contact was hardly surprising in this male driven society, but having to spend _more_ time with Isabel felt like cruel and unusual punishment.

The cab ride was downright frosty and as soon as they arrived at the hotel, Felicity checked in and then made a beeline for the hotel bar. She desperately needed a drink and to get out from underneath Isabel’s scrutiny. 

She was just enjoying her glass of wine when someone dropped into the chair next to hers. Felicity looked over and saw that it was none other than Isabel. She nearly screamed with frustration. 

“I would have thought you’d want to rest in your room,” Felicity said to her, her tone only barely polite. 

“Same with you, Ms. Smoak,” Isabel drawled. She signaled the waiter to bring her a vodka. “I decided I wanted to unwind first, looks like you had the same idea.”

“Mmm.” Felicity drank from her wineglass. The absolute last thing she wanted to be doing right now was sharing smalltalk with Isabel. “It was a long flight, some decompression is a requirement.”

“Are you waiting for Oliver to return to the hotel?”

The question seemed casual but this was Isabel and Felicity knew better. “I think he can find his room on his own, he’s a big boy.”

“Oh, Ms. Smoak, let’s not lie to one another,” Isabel said in a patronizing tone, sipping at her vodka. “We all know it won’t be his room he’ll be finding.”

Felicity fought the urge to gape at the woman. “I have no idea what you’re talking about,” she replied mildly. “I reserved us all separate rooms. Except for you, of course, since I didn’t know you’d be joining us. I hope you were able to find a room?”

Isabel raised an eyebrow. “It was no trouble, I assure you.” She drank more of her vodka. “So we’re going to pretend you and Oliver are not sleeping with one another?”

“Nothing to pretend, Ms. Rochev,” Felicity assured her. “Our relationship is strictly professional.” 

Isabel’s laugh was harsh and disbelieving. Felicity hoped her cheeks weren’t as red as they felt. Despite her best efforts, the woman was getting under her skin. She wished she’d just leave her alone. 

“The way he ogles you in your tight skirts? Please. Don’t think me a fool, Ms. Smoak.”

Felicity saw red. 

“And don’t think _me_ the sort of woman who will put up with your taunts, Ms. Rochev.” She was seething now, angry at Isabel for her insinuations but angrier at herself for rising to the bait. “If you’ll excuse me, I think I’ll be going up to my room now.”

Isabel smiled benignly. “Such a pity,” she purred as Felicity got to her feet. “We were just getting to know one another.”

Felicity fought the urge to growl as she strode out of the hotel bar and towards the bank of elevators.The nerve of that woman!By the time she was unlocking her hotel room door, her hands were shaking and tears were pressing at the backs of her eyes. 

She slammed the door behind her and leaned against it, mentally berating herself for letting Isabel get to her like that. 

It was going to be a long couple of days. 

***

The next day was a busy one and Felicity kept quiet about her run in with Isabel. Oliver had enough on his mind without having to worry about that nonsense too. And she had enough to worry about too. The plan was for Dig to get himself arrested and sent to this gulag where Agent Michaels had last been seen. To get arrested, he had to be found with a significant amount of drugs, which Anatoly helpfully provided for them. Still, as Dig prepared to dangle himself in front of Russian law, Felicity couldn’t help but worry about her friend. 

She’d actually been about to ask him to rethink his plan when he told her and Oliver that Lyla wasn’t just his friend and ARGUS contact; she was his ex-wife. She’d been stunned at the revelation and Oliver clearly had been as well. But it explained why it was so important to Dig to find her and get her out safely. That made it easy to promise to help him, regardless what it took. 

After Dig was arrested, they met with Anatoly, who Felicity found to be charming and sweet, and then drove to a neutral location to meet with some men willing to sell them a police truck. The whole thing had introduced her to a side of Oliver that she wasn’t familiar with. When the men selling the truck had tried to play hardball and refuse to sell, Oliver had walked up to the man in charge and had muttered something to him in Russian. His voice was low and threatening and deadly sexy. Whatever it was he’d said had frightened the man enough that he readily handed the keys over to Oliver, who then tossed them to Anatoly. 

When Felicity asked him what he’d said, dying to know what it was that had gotten such a reaction and a sharp change of mind, Oliver had just replied that he’d said please. The wink was what did it. Felicity cursed her luck as they drove back to the hotel while Anatoly drove off with the police truck. Oliver in Russia was officially the hottest she’d ever seen him before and it would likely be a long, long time before she got the image of him in that long coat, growling in Russian out of her mind. 

The man was lethal, in more ways than one. 

Now, she was back in her room, waiting for the time they’d agreed upon to meet with Anatoly. He’d be picking them up behind the hotel in the police truck and driving them to the gulag which was miles outside of the city. From there, they’d assist Diggle in escaping the gulag, hopefully with Lyla in tow. There were a lot of “ifs” in this plan, and that made Felicity nervous. She had a book to read to pass the time but she ended up pacing back and forth in front of the windows, nibbling at the corner of her thumbnail as she worried. 

There was a knock at her door, which startled her. She checked the clock next to her bed and saw it was another half hour before she was supposed to meet with Oliver and then with Anatoly. Maybe it was room service? But she hadn’t called for room service. 

Her brow was furrowed as she crossed to the door and looked through the peephole. She was surprised to find Oliver standing on the other side. She opened the door. 

“Oliver, you’re early,” she pointed out. “And I thought I was supposed to come get you.”

“Can I come in?” he asked. He seemed filled with tension, his fingers rubbing against each other in that familiar tic of his. 

“Sure,” she said, standing back to let him in and then closing the door. “What’s going on?”

She’d no sooner turned back to face him then Oliver was right there, pressing her against the door with his body. She opened her mouth to ask him what he was doing but then his lips were on hers and her brain shorted out. 

He kissed her hard and insistently, like it was something he _needed_ to do. His lips were firm against hers, moving and coaxing hers until she turned to jelly in his arms. She grabbed his arms to steady herself, moaning into his mouth. She was dimly aware that she should probably be ashamed of making such a wanton noise but the reality of kissing Oliver wiped away all thoughts other than simply appreciating how it felt to be kissed by Oliver. 

He nipped at her lip, urging her to open to him and she eagerly did so, welcoming his tongue into her mouth. His hands came up to frame her face, holding her there for him as he ravaged her mouth, his fingers tangling in her hair where it hung loose around her face. The kiss was hot, insistent, demanding and tinged with desperation. He _wanted_ her; and as he pressed his body against hers, pinning her to the door, she felt exactly how much. 

Her thoughts swam as she registered how hard he was as he rubbed against her. She whimpered and he eagerly swallowed the sound, answering it with a moan of his own that sounded so hot that Felicity felt like she was two seconds away from bursting into flames. 

She pushed back on his chest a little, just to give her a little room to breathe, room to _think_. Her head was swimming and her pulse was racing and she gasped for air as Oliver released her lips. He nipped along her jaw. 

“Oliver,” she breathed. 

“Is this okay?” he asked, between sucking kisses to the curve of her jaw. “I want you… please say you want me too.”

‘Want’ was such a small word for what she feeling. “Yes,” she groaned. “I do… but… why now?” 

Oliver drew back and his dark, hungry eyes snared hers. 

“I was just down in the hotel bar,” he told her. “Isabel was down there.”

“Oh…” Felicity’s stomach dropped and she tried to step away. Oliver tightened his arms around her, holding her in place. 

“Where are you going?” he asked her, his voice rough. 

“I just… You said Isabel and I—“

Oliver cut her off. “Felicity, she came onto me. And it made me realize… I had to come up here.”

Her stomach did another acrobatic act, but this time it was more of a swoop.“Oh!”

“I didn’t want her. I wanted you. I only want you, Felicity.”

“But… I thought you didn’t want this, that you didn’t want me…”

“I wanted you to think that,” Oliver admitted. “I can’t stop thinking about you, Felicity. And I’m tired of pretending that I don’t want you.”

Her desire was a potent, powerful thing surging through her veins. She leaned up on her tiptoes to press a kiss on the underside of his jaw. “I’m tired too.”

“What are we waiting for?” he asked, and she knew he meant right here, right now, the lust they were both feeling that was making her head spin and perhaps his too. 

“For after we save Dig and Lyla?” she suggested, pressing another kiss to his chest, over his shirt and feeling the heat of his body. 

Oliver groaned. “I can’t wait that long.” To emphasize his point, he flexed his fingers on her hips, the long digits wrapping around to tease at the curve of her ass. Somehow, his desperation fueled hers and hearing just how badly he wanted her _right now_ was unspeakably hot. 

He pulled her up against him and his lips crashed to hers again. Felicity lost herself in the kiss, the feel of his hands on her body, his skin under her hands as she unbuttoned his shirt and splayed her fingers cross the hot skin of his chest, the scent of him, the taste of his mouth, the sounds he made as he kissed her harder, deeper… 

Forcibly, she pulled her lips from his. “We have—“ He kissed at her lips again before moving to her neck—“about a half hour before need to—guh!—meet Anatoly,” she panted. Oliver sucked at her neck, and she knew she was going to be marked up from this assault but she also found that she didn’t care one little bit. In fact, she wanted to mark _him_ too. He held her against him and she sucked at his neck, soothing the spot with her tongue while he groaned. 

“We better make the most of it then,” he said throatily. 

Without warning, he pulled her off her feet entirely and moved her away from the door. A few steps later, he was at the bed and he tossed her on it, grinning as she bounced. 

“Oliver!” 

“You’re gorgeous,” he told her as he began to pull off her boots, her socks, her pants… Felicity forgot any outrage she may have had, faux or otherwise. As soon as he was in reach, she pushed the open shirt the rest of the way off his shoulders. This began a frantic removal of clothes, each of them eager to get stripped down and start enjoying each other’s bodies as soon as possible. 

It was fast. Felicity knew it was fast. But in that moment, with Oliver sucking at her breasts, tugging at her nipples with his teeth, she didn’t care that it was fast. The logic she’d spend the last six or so months crafting disappeared in a puff of hazy lust. 

“Want you,” she grunted as he ground his thick cock against her clit, priming her when she really didn’t need any priming at all. She was pretty sure she’d been soaking wet the minute he’d pushed her against the door and kissed her. 

“Condom?” he gasped into her neck. 

“Uh…” Her brain struggled to catch on to what he was asking. She wanted him inside her so badly, her body just couldn’t fathom why he wasn’t already filling her. But then, she realized he was asking about protection and a little of the fog cleared. 

“I’m on the pill,” she told him. “I’m clean. I promise.”

Oliver paused his assault on her body to lift his head and look her in the eyes. His own eyes were dark and desperate, his pupils blown. “I’m clean too,” he told her. “And I haven’t been with anyone since you.”

Her heart stumbled in her chest so hard she was sure he could feel it where their chests were pressed together. “I haven’t been with anyone since you either,” she told him. “And, to be honest, not for a long time before that too.”

Impossibly, his eyes grew darker. He dipped his head and kissed her, but this time it was a slow, tender embrace. Each movement of his lips on hers was drawn out and she could feel him pouring emotion into his movements, how he cradled her face with his hands, how he kissed her so gently and so deeply that she honestly wondered if she’d ever be able to kiss another man again and feel even a tenth of what Oliver was giving her right here, right now. 

“What are you doing to me?” he murmured between kisses, so quietly she almost didn’t hear him. 

“I need you,” she gasped, as his hips flexed and she was reminded of the arousal he’d been steadily building in her as his cock brushed against her sensitive folds once more. 

“Yes,” he muttered and then he was reaching down between their bodies and she could feel his fingers skate over her flesh, teasing her for just a moment before he grabbed ahold of his cock and positioned himself at her entrance. “Felicity, look at me,” he demanded, a little desperately. 

She locked eyes with him, her legs spread wide for him, her thighs cradling his hips. She tilted her pelvis slightly so that the tip of him edged just inside of her. Oliver’s eyes clouded for a moment but he remained focused on her. 

“Fuck,” he grunted. “Do that again.”

She angled her hips and pressed up again, taking more of him in. Oliver groaned and then pushed the rest of the way inside of her, filling her so completely and suddenly that she cried out at the perfect pleasure of it. 

He fit so perfectly inside her, like he was made for her. “I love how you feel inside me,” she told him, breathless. 

“God, yes. You’re so tight and hot… you feel incredible.”

He withdrew slowly and then slammed into her, making her grunt and reach behind her head for the slats of the headboard, just to have something to ground her. 

“Faster,” she begged. 

Oliver obliged, leaving and returning a few more times, pounding into her quicker. She could see the sweat standing out on his temples but his eyes remained on hers. Felicity clutched at his shoulders, her nails digging in a little as she urged him on as best she could. 

“Right there,” she gasped as she felt his cock brush against something inside of her that made her knees feel like they were turning to jelly. “God! Oliver!” 

“Felicity,” he moaned, his lips near her ear. 

He moved faster and harder, fucking her hard now the way she’d always dreamed of him doing, even before last May. The headboard slapped the wall and their flesh impacted, filling the room with obscene noises and she loved it, she _reveled_ in it. Oliver was grunting and she was moaning and they made a perfectly raunchy show of it but it was all real and here and _now_. 

“Fuck, you’re so hot,” she groaned, arching against him as he slammed into her, jostling her bones in the best way possible. 

“Shit, I love when you swear,” he gasped, dipping his head to kiss her again. This time, it was a sloppy thing, full of tongues and moaning. 

She could feel her climax building fast, like a freight train bearing down the tracks and her cries grew louder and sharper. “Ah! Oliver!”

“That’s it, baby,” he coaxed her. “Come for me.”

Felicity’s orgasm detonated inside of her and she could feel her walls clenching on Oliver’s plunging cock, drawing him inside of her and milking him. As she clenched all over, Oliver roared out his own release and she felt him tremble above her even as his cock jerked inside of her. She pictured his cum spilling inside of her and she felt the pulse of his cock and that made her clench on him even harder. 

Oliver swore, dropping his head to her shoulder and breaking their eye contact at last. Underneath him, Felicity shuddered and rode out the aftershocks of her orgasm, clinging fast to his hard, sweaty body. 

***

Oliver’s cellphone pinged insistently as he yanked on his pants. Next to him, Felicity was shimmying into her own pants and doing up the button. They were most definitely late meeting Anatoly who was the one currently sending him texts asking him where he was. 

It was worth it.

When Isabel had tried putting the moves on him earlier, it’d become startlingly clear to him which woman he’d rather have beneath him. It most certainly wasn’t Isabel, who had not only made his life considerably more difficult lately but had been terrorizing Felicity. She didn’t tell him about all the incidents, he knew that. Some of them he witnessed himself without either woman knowing, some Dig told him about. And some he could read on Felicity’s face, in the way she clenched her jaw or kept her eyes downcast around the other woman. 

If he hadn’t already had an unfavorable opinion of the cold, calculating woman, seeing how she treated Felicity would have cemented it. So when Isabel had trailed her fingers up his arm down at the bar, telling him that she knew what it was like to be lonely, it hadn’t been her body he wished to seek a connection with. 

It was Felicity. It was always Felicity. He’d thought of her a lot before the Undertaking. Or at least he’d thought it’d been a lot. The frequency with which she filled his mind since, however, put that all to shame. He thought of her constantly; when he was alone, when he was in the middle of meetings, when he was with Dig on patrol, when the three of them were together in the office or the lair… _constantly_. 

But he’d promised her that he’d help her preserve their partnership and build a better friendship, which meant that he couldn’t act on any of the dozens of impulses that took hold of him throughout any given day. Their friendship was important to her and no matter that he could feel Felicity’s attraction for him was every bit as strong as his for her, he wasn’t going to do something that would jeopardize his promise to her. 

But then, he had anyhow. 

Having sex wasn’t his plan when he came to Felicity’s room. That didn’t mean it hadn’t been on his mind, racing through with each mental image more sultry and lurid than the one before it.But when she’d opened the door and he’d seen her face, the reasons for not kissing her had evaporated like fog in the sunlight. Then, once he kissed her, he simply couldn’t stop. 

Felicity had kissed him back, eagerly. He’d almost begun to think he’d imagined her responsiveness during their one night together but apparently he hadn’t. The two of them came together like a fire-starter and a pile of dried pine needles. Incendiary, hot and unstoppable. Oliver had had a lot of sex in his life, more than his fair share even, and it’d never been like this for him before. 

When she’d told him that she hadn’t been with anyone since May… or even for a long time before that… when she trusted him enough to forgo the condom, that had changed everything for him. No longer had this been about just wanting her or lust or a quick fuck to relieve the tension; it was more than that. He wasn’t too interested in asking himself much more than that, though. Because now, on the other side of it, he was starting to feel a little scared. 

Whatever they had between them was clearly powerful and explosive and real and what that meant for the two of them going forward was fucking intimidating to contemplate. And right now, they had to go help Dig. 

As soon as they were both dressed, Oliver pressed a quick kiss to Felicity’s lips and jerked his head towards the door. She nodded and took his hand, letting him lead her out of the room. They’d just walked out of the room when a soft, feminine, “oh!” pulled his attention from closing the hotel door behind him. 

He turned to find Isabel standing in front of the door just down the hall, which happened to be his room. She was staring at the two of them, her eyes wide as she took in every detail. Oliver felt Felicity clutch his hand a little tighter and he squeezed back. 

“Hello, Isabel. Is there something I can help you with?” he asked. 

“I was just—“ She stopped herself as her expression cooled significantly. “I just wanted to make sure you were fine after our conversation earlier. You left in quite a hurry.”

He couldn’t help the smile that spread across his face. “Yes, I realized I had something to tell Felicity and it just couldn’t wait.”

Isabel’s calculating gaze shifted to Felicity who met her stare. “Is that so, Ms. Smoak?”Then, Isabel’s eyes dropped to their hands and her expression turned positively glacial. “Working overtime?”

The insinuation was clear and Oliver wasn’t interested in entertaining her nastiness a moment longer. “If you’ll excuse us, Ms. Rochev, we have some business to attend to.” 

He started to walk down the hall towards the elevators, pulling on Felicity’s hand. She said nothing, but followed after him. 

“If it’s business perhaps I—“ Isabel called after them. 

Oliver simply called over his shoulder, “No need, Isabel. This doesn’t concern you.”

As they stepped into the elevator, Felicity blew out a breath and shook her head at him. “We’re gonna pay for that later, you know.”

“Let her try,” Oliver said. They had other, more important, fish to fry tonight. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As you can see, the kiss cliffhanger from chapter 9 was REALLY no big deal. I take a lot of care when I tag a story because I don't believe in misleading the readers. If there was romantic Flommy in this story, I would have tagged for it. And I was quite offended that anyone would insinuate that I would purposefully leave it out. I know what I'm doing with this story. Again, this story was written MONTHS ago, was finished months ago and I knew that the kiss, while a good ego boost for Felicity *that she deserved to have*, was no big deal in the grand scheme. It really was just a cliffhanger. I got the emotional reaction I wanted out of it, however, some people took that a bit far and got a little aggressive in their comments. For the record: not liking a story beat does not justify acting like a jerk to other people. I mean that for this story, for other people's stories and for the show as well. So please. Can we keep it civil? Please?
> 
> I've turned off anonymous comments (since, predictably, the most offensive comments were left by anonymous accounts because sometimes bravery only exists online when you can hide your true identity). If things don't improve, I will restrict this story to registered readers only and/or turn on comment moderation. 
> 
> Anyhow. I hope you liked this chapter. Once upon a time, I was very excited to share this one with you all but now I'm feeling the wind taken from my sails a bit. Now I know how the Arrow writers feel.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Does what happened in Russia, stay in Russia? Both Oliver and Felicity have a lot on their minds during the long flight back to Starling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone for your super awesome comments on the last chapter. I really appreciate each and every one of them. You guys are the best and are why I believe this fandom is one of the best there is. So supportive!
> 
> I'm glad everyone enjoyed last chapter. I wish I could say it was onwards and upwards from there but... there are miles left to go before we sleep. ;)
> 
> Big thanks to fistis for the artwork and my long-suffering beta the-silverforked-sky deserves a medal or something. She's been amazing.

The Queen Consolidated company jet bumped along as it flew through some turbulence over Europe. Oliver wasn’t terribly nervous; he was well used to planes and, in his mind, anything beat traveling by boat. But he could appreciate that a bumpy ride made some people nervous. Like Felicity. 

She was sitting on the other side of the aisle and while her eyes were trained out the small window in a show of nonchalance, he could see where her knuckles were white as she gripped her armrests. Felicity hadn’t said more than about ten words since they took off from Moscow that morning. Oliver would take it personally but he knew the reason why she was so closed off. 

He turned his head to look behind him, where Isabel was sitting. She kept glaring daggers at Felicity now and then and had been since she’d arrived at the airport this morning. It’d been a couple hours now since the jet took off and the chill had yet to abate. Oliver wanted to fix it, to make Felicity feel better about things, but he just didn’t know _how_. 

Rescuing Dig and Lyla had been a success, thank god. He hesitated to say it went off without a hitch because of course it never did. But, with a handy assist from none other than Deadshot himself, they were able to get out and away, with Lyla in tow. Dig had worked with Floyd Lawton, begrudgingly, and had let him go free after they were clear of the gulag, mostly because Dig was starting to recognize the fault for his brother’s death didn’t rest solely on Deadshot’s shoulders. And it was thanks to Lawton that Lyla had been found and rescued. 

She was bruised, dirty, hungry and tired, but no worse for the wear. Oliver didn’t know her very well but his impression of her was that she was one tough lady. Dig had hovered over her ever since, never letting her out of his sight or removing his hand from her body. 

Right now, the two of them were up in the jet’s bedroom where Lyla was getting some much needed rest while John looked after her. Oliver was still getting used to the fact that she was Dig’s ex-wife. He hadn’t even known his friend had been married before, which was a bit alarming considering the homework he’d done on both him and Felicity before approaching them to join the team. The fact that the marriage was somewhat hidden meant there was more to the story there than meets the eye. But now wasn’t the time to be asking Dig about it. 

Isabel hadn’t said much to him or anyone else since she joined them at the airport this morning. So far, she’d just sat in her seat, going over paperwork and occasionally glaring at Felicity. The latter seemed to think Isabel might do something vindictive after having caught them coming out of Felicity’s hotel room together, but Oliver wasn’t so sure. What could she do, really? Neither he nor Felicity had done anything wrong. Company fraternization policies were very lax and even if they weren’t, they hadn’t been on the company clock (or on company premises). 

So Oliver was left, for the moment, to brood alone. He couldn’t stop thinking about what had happened between him and Felicity. Their hookup had been incredible, hot and the fulfillment of so many of the fantasies he’d had of her while he was on the island all summer long. However, the light of day shone brightly over all the questions he _should_ have asked himself the night before, before he went to Felicity’s room.

What he’d told her was the truth. He wanted her, he couldn’t stop thinking about her. But the real truth was those feelings went a lot deeper than just the lust they’d acted on in her hotel room. A hell of a lot deeper. And it scared the shit out of him. 

He’d come back to Starling, determined to do things differently this time. He’d made a lot of mistakes when he came home the first time, mistakes he should have seen coming a mile away. The biggest mistake was Laurel. He should have left her alone with Tommy, wished them both well, and stayed far away. He’d confused his need for redemption from her with some ill-conceived notion of love and let three lives get ruined in the process. 

No, the best thing for him to do was focus on being the Arrow. He was finally doing good work, work his father would have been proud of, and that work was where he was needed. If he went down this path with Felicity, the path his heart was tugging him insistently towards, he’d ruin her. As sure as the sun was nearing its peak over their heads right now, and would set in the west at the end of this long, long day, he would ruin her. 

Oliver couldn’t risk it. He couldn’t risk their partnership, or her or even his own heart. He hated to step back from her, knowing that it was only a matter of time before some man (a better man than him) recognized what an amazing woman she was and snapped her up. Oliver wasn’t looking forward to that day, already anticipating the pain of losing her for good, but he knew it was what was best for her. She didn’t need a broken, scarred and fucked up man to share her life with. She needed more than he could ever conceive of giving her. 

He wasn’t looking forward to having this discussion with her. He was pretty sure she’d be hurt by it, and so would he. But some short-term pain was preferable over long-term destruction. What he’d done to Laurel, the part he’d played in her death and the events leading up to it; that couldn’t be taken back now. It was too late for Laurel, but it was not too late for Felicity. 

Oliver settled back in his chair and kept his eyes on Felicity, letting the sadness wash over him. Letting her go, letting go of the dream of having a life with her, of growing a family together, was going to end up being the hardest thing he’d ever done. 

***

Felicity shifted in her seat, uncomfortable not because the plush leather lounger was not up to snuff (it most definitely was and now she was spoiled for air travel by any other means than private jet), and not because of the turbulence (or not _just_ because of the turbulence), but because of the weight of Isabel’s stare. If she’d thought the barracuda was hard on her before, Felicity had gotten an all new education on the concept since their run in with her last night. 

Her cheeks heated as she remembered the way Isabel had looked her up and down, calculating, noticing Oliver’s hand holding hers, clearly drawing (correct) assumptions about what they’d just done. While Felicity knew logically there was no real reason to be embarrassed, she still was and it had everything to do with Isabel’s glacial gaze. 

Even now, Felicity knew that if she turned, she would see those dark, slanted eyes regarding her in a cold, disconnected manner. She fought a shiver that wanted to chase down her spine. She didn’t know what Isabel had planned regarding making Felicity’s life a living hell at work after this, but she knew it wasn’t going to be pretty. More gossip spread around the office, perhaps? Felicity may as well kiss any possible promotions within IT or any other tech department at QC goodbye. Even if they managed to squeeze Isabel out eventually, like they hoped to do, those rumors would follow Felicity around for as long as she remained at Queen Consolidated. 

Of course, she could always leave QC and get a job elsewhere… she could even take Tommy up on his offer as he’d promised her it would stand for as long as she needed it to. But leaving QC just didn’t seem like the right thing to do right now. Oliver needed her help, he relied on her and she liked working with him. She’d never admit to enjoying being anyone’s EA, of course, but what she was doing right now, it felt like more than just that and she was helping him, which was important to her. She truly felt as though she was an integral part of the decision-making process for the future of the company. Looking over all the innovative projects that came across Oliver’s desk and advising him on which ones they should pursue and how to make them feasible was more enriching than she could have expected. 

After everything that happened with Cooper back at MIT, Felicity had convinced herself that a low-key life down in IT was the best thing for her. But now, she realized that she wanted more than that. Running a company energized something inside of her and even though the world and all of QC only saw her as an executive assistant, she knew the truth and so did Oliver. He depended on her and together they made an amazing team. Now that she’d had this taste, she really didn’t think she could ever go back to the low-level IT job again. She needed and deserved more. And Oliver had showed her that, brought that into her life. She was grateful. 

But she still wasn’t sure if that gratitude and her loyalty were more important than taking care of herself and what was best for her in the long run. Oliver’s sudden strange behavior wasn’t helping her feel any more secure about it, either.

She glanced away from the plane window to see what Oliver was doing. He looked like he was settling into his seat and trying to take a nap. They hadn’t spoken much since the incident in her hotel room. Incident… no, it was fucking. That’s what it was. It was hot and fast and _amazing._ To be honest, she hoped to repeat the event again as soon as possible. But, something about the way Oliver had acted as they got on the plane earlier made her worry that a repeat performance wasn’t going to be in the cards. 

In fact, if she didn’t know any better, she’d say he had his brooding face back on. 

Not good. 

So Felicity was distracting herself from that and from Isabel’s constant bitch-face towards her by staring out the window. And, truthfully, she actually was kind of tired. The mission to extract Dig and Lyla the night before had kept them up until the early morning hours. It meant she’d only had enough time to pack up her things and get to the airport in time. 

As she settled in, pulling a throw she’d dug out of the compartment near the door when she’d first entered the jet, Felicity noticed Isabel moving over to where Oliver was sitting. She tried not to act interested in what was going on but… well, she was interested. Felicity had always been a nosy sort of person, despite her best intentions. 

“I need you to look over these merger papers,” Isabel said, handing a folder over to Oliver. He looked at it as though it might have cooties before reluctantly accepting. 

“Can’t this wait until we’re back in the office?” he asked, sounding tired and annoyed. 

“I’d like to get back to the board at Bond Technologies as soon as the business day begins tomorrow, which means you need to look this over now.”

“And do what? Give you my blessing? When have you ever needed that before?” he asked, his eyebrows drawing together. 

Isabel visibly seethed. “Because you have 52% of the controlling shares, _Mr. Quee_ n, and I need you to sign off on this before I move forward with it.”

Oliver sighed. “Okay, I’ll look them over but I might want a second pair of eyes before I make any decisions.”

Felicity snapped her eyes shut, hoping that she looked like she was already asleep, in case Oliver looked over her way. From the way the hairs on the back of her neck rose, she thought that maybe he was. He always consulted her on business decisions these days, valuing her input, opinion and advice when making those decisions. She had a good head for business and sometimes could see things in a way that he did not. Naturally, she expected that he wanted to look over these documents with her, see what she thought. 

But right then, Felicity wasn’t in the mood.Everything since the moment they stepped out of her hotel room the night before has felt like some sort of game of cat and mouse. Sometimes Isabel was the cat, sometimes they were the mouse, sometimes Felicity felt like _she_ was the mouse and Oliver was the cat. She just wasn’t interested in playing anymore. She was tired and wanted to go to sleep. This once, he could figure it out on his own. 

She heard Isabel scoff. “Well, don’t take too long. I’ll expect to hear your answer before start of business in the morning.”Some rustling indicated Isabel was returning to her seat and Felicity kept her eyes closed. 

“Felicity?” Oliver’s voice was soft, so as not to be overheard by Isabel. 

She debated for a moment opening her eyes and giving him a hand. Her first instinct was always to help this man. But then she remembered how tired she was and all the other nonsense and she steeled her resolve. So she ignored him, with a great deal of effort. And eventually, as she listened to Oliver shuffling through the papers, she drifted off to sleep. 

***

Felicity was speeding through her inbox, getting everything done, including the catch-up work from while they’d been in Russia, with swift efficiency. A good night’s sleep after they landed in Starling the evening before made all the difference. Her choice of outfit today didn’t hurt either.She’d dressed in one of her favorite of the new additions to her wardrobe, a black, figure hugging pencil skirt and a white blouse with sparkly black polka dots on it. She’d left her hair down, straight and smooth, and with her glasses, she felt like she exuded confidence and professionalism. She’d probably need it today, to deal with Isabel in the aftermath of that trip to Russia. 

Oliver was already in the office when she arrived, which was unusual. He probably had to get that paperwork signed and over to Isabel and had come in for that. Felicity felt a little guilt from refusing to help him the day before, but she wouldn’t have done it if she didn’t think Oliver could handle it without her. He was a lot better at this job than he gave himself credit for. 

The tension between them all morning long had been building, however. And while there were several times she wanted to go into his office to ask him how things were going or make some other sort of small talk, she’d resisted. The last thing she wanted to do was make it worse. So she decided to let him come to her, if he wanted to. 

It was after lunch, which she’d eaten at her desk, that Oliver finally approached her desk for the first time that day. 

“Felicity,” he said, waving a folder as he stopped in front of her. “Can you please make sure that Carl in finance gets this before five?”

“Sure thing,” she said, accepting it. Then she turned her eyes on him expectantly. 

Oliver shifted from foot to foot, looking nervous, which made her start to feel nervous. “Uhm, I was thinking maybe we should talk.”

“Right now?” she asked, blinking around them at the office. Sure, things were slow right now, he had no meetings scheduled and Isabel had remained thankfully absent all day long… but talking about “things” right out in the open seemed like a poor idea. 

“Yeah, if you’re not too busy with work.We can talk in my office?”

Her heart inexplicably dropped into her stomach. The look on his face wasn’t closed off, like she’d almost expected. Instead, there was a tell-tale furrow between his eyes and his mouth was set in a hard line. Felicity didn’t consider herself an expert on reading Oliver, necessarily, but he seemed a little anxious about talking with her. Which wasn’t a good sign at all. 

She followed him into his office and watched as he closed the door behind them. He hit the switch that fogged the glass walls, giving them some privacy. That could be considered a sexy move and Felicity would be lying if she said she’d never thought of them getting a little naughty in here before. But combined with his uneasy demeanor, she was thinking it was just another bad sign. 

So she sat on the leather couch, her hands clasped in her lap and waited to see what he had to say. He sat in the chair opposite her, leaning forward with his elbows rested on his knees. Felicity struggled not to appreciate how his suit stretched over his muscles, pulling across his thighs. Now was definitely not the time to be getting turned on. 

“How are you doing after the trip?” he asked. “Any jet lag?”

“Not so much,” she replied. “I slept most of the flight and after we got home so I think that sort of reset me a bit.”

He nodded, biting his lips. “I wanted to talk about what happened between us at the hotel.”

“Okay… what about it?” Her palms were sweating. She resisted the urge to wipe them on her skirt. 

“I just… wanted to make sure that you didn’t get any wrong ideas from what happened.”

Felicity blinked. Her immediate reaction was confusion. But then she realized what he’d said. _Wrong_ ideas? What the hell sort of idea would he expect her to have after they slept together? _Again_? Her growing ire must have shown on her face because he lifted a hand. 

“I’m sorry, that came out wrong. I just meant… my opinions on us haven’t changed,” he told her. “I don’t think I can have a relationship and be the Arrow right now.”

Irritation joined the flash of anger and Felicity found herself digging her nails into her palms. “Do I not get a say in this at all?” she asked quietly, trying to hold herself back. 

“Felicity…” 

“No, we were both in that room. We both made that decision to sleep together. We both made the decision back in May too. So when do I get a vote on what happens, going forward?”

“It’s not as simple as that, Felicity,” Oliver said. “This life we lead… it’s dangerous. I just think its better that we keep our relationship platonic. We’re excellent partners and I don’t want to lose that.”

“I don’t want to lose that either, Oliver. And we don’t have to. I understand how dangerous this life is, probably better than anyone else. I’ve seen firsthand what happens when you go out on a mission and what its like to wait for you to make it back, safe and sound. I’m invested in that life every bit as much as you are.”

Oliver looked down at his hands, clasped in front of him, his brow still furrowed. There was a tightness around his eyes and she knew he was upset to be saying this. What she couldn’t figure out was why he was saying it at all. 

“I can’t keep you from the team,” he finally said, his voice quiet. “I know that’s probably what I should do, to keep you safe, but I can’t do that. It’s your life, your choice and you’ve obviously made it. But it’s something else altogether to be _with_ me and do what we do. If any of my enemies ever knew… they would use you, Felicity, to get to me.”

“You’re not telling me anything I haven’t already thought about, Oliver. But aren’t I just as safe with you than I am without you?”

“No. Because I bring danger into everyone’s life. Look what happened to Laurel.”

She sat back, closing her eyes. Laurel. Of course he would still be feeling guilty about how everything played out with her. “And you think that if we had a relationship, if we were in love, that what happened to Laurel would happen to me?”

“I do,” he said, nodding. He kept his eyes averted from hers. There was something he wasn’t telling her but she knew better than to try to pry it out of him. If anyone could match her stubbornness, it was Oliver Queen. 

“I think you’re a fool,” she told him. 

That made his gaze whip to hers. The crease between his eyebrows deepened as he frowned at her. “What?”

“You heard me. You think you’re this dangerous monster, that you hurt everyone you love and you shut yourself off from actually living your life. You survived that island, Oliver, not just to save your city, but to _live your life_. And until you start doing that, every loss you’ve suffered will have been in vain.”

He stared at her, stricken. “You don’t know—“ he began, his eyebrows drawing together again. 

She held up a hand and got to her feet before he could start yelling. “I know plenty. And a lot more than you probably think I do, Oliver. But here’s the thing, I’m not going to push you.”

He got to his feet too, now looking perplexed. 

“I don’t appreciate you making decisions for me, but if you’re not going to give on your side, there’s not much I can do,” she told him with a shrug. 

“Felicity,” he said, his voice softening. “It’s not that I want to make this choice—“

She cut him off again. “No, I don’t want to hear any of that. Because it’ll just give me hope and I don’t want any if there isn’t any. But I will say this.” She took a deep breath. “I need you to be sure, Oliver. You need to figure this out, once and for all, because I don’t care to be pulled around. If you don’t want to be with me, then that’s it. No more falling into bed again and calling it a mistake. We can continue to work together and be friends but nothing more. Because I can’t live like that, I don’t want to live like that. Okay?”

He looked abashed now, ducking his head, the tips of his ears pink. “Okay,” he agreed. 

She began walking towards the door and when she reached it, she heard his voice at her back. 

“Felicity?”

She turned. “Yeah?”

“Will we still be able to work together? Here and… at the foundry? It’s just… I need you and I don’t think I can do this without you anymore…”

He looked like a puppy dog, or a little boy who’d just had his ice cream cone stolen away and her heart softened. It was truly unfair how he could go from infuriating her to making her want to comfort him within the span of a few short minutes. She really _should_ hate him, and she probably would if she didn’t love him so much. 

So, she gave him a smile, a real one. “Of course we can, Oliver. I’m a professional. I like the work I do at the foundry with you and I like helping you here, too. Regardless of what happens with _us_ , that’ll always be true.”

He relaxed some, his shoulders losing some of their tightness. He returned her smile and she walked out of his office, closing the door behind her. 

***

Oliver sat at his desk long after Felicity went home. He’d told both her and Diggle to take the night off of Arrow work. They could all use the break and Dig was still taking care of Lyla and nursing her back to full health. The other man had seemed very relieved to be free to return to her side. 

Oliver thought about what he’d want to do in Diggle’s shoes, if the woman he loved was recovering from what Lyla had gone through. Well, first he’d want to murder every person responsible for putting her there to begin with, but then… he wouldn’t want to leave her side. And it was becoming increasingly clear that the woman he envisioned in that scenario was Felicity, and Felicity alone. 

He dropped his head into his hands, running his fingers through the short strands. He’d messed up today, by saying what he had to Felicity. The hurt on her face had been so clear and so honest that immediately, Oliver had wished he could take it all back. 

Before speaking to Felicity, he’d convinced himself that backpedaling from a relationship with her was the best possible move for both of them. He’d been nothing but honest with her here in his office. Still, he hadn’t told her the whole truth. He hadn’t told her that he was falling in love with her. 

That he might already be in love with her. 

Shit, he probably was. Oliver had never been good about sitting down an examining his feelings, even _before_ the island. He accepted that he loved his family, unconditionally, and he also loved his friends. He never questioned the when and how of it all. Introspection into matters of the heart hadn’t ever been something he was good at. 

His relationship with Laurel was a great example. When he started dating Laurel in high school, his parents had been thrilled. She was a good girl from a good family with a bright future ahead of her. She was strong and smart and beautiful and exactly the sort of woman they wanted to see their son with. Oliver had known it at the time. It had both pleased him and bothered him. He was happy to have something in his life his parents could be proud of. Lord knows there was little else, especially his academic failures and run-ins with the law. On the other hand, the weight of their expectations and the feeling that he wasn’t really getting a choice in the matter of his own future annoyed him. 

At the time he hadn’t spent any time examining it, but now, Oliver was fairly sure that’s why he’d cheated on Laurel as much as he had. It was his own way of rebelling against his parents expectations, and Laurel’s expectations as well. It was a shitty way to assert one’s independence, but he’d been a thoughtless prick back then. So when it came to loving Laurel, he knew he absolutely had, but that love had been burdened with the load of expectations placed on him. Had he loved her because of her or because he was expected to? Now, in the months after her death, he had a hard time recounting to himself just what it was he loved most about her. Not just her smile or her hand in his… but what about her, personally, had he fallen in love with? 

It was hard to wrap his head around. 

But Felicity was different. With her, things were a lot clearer and his feelings for her were a lot clearer too. He’d first come to her because he needed her help and he came back to her because he could trust her. He’d enjoyed her babbles and her witty rambles and the bit of light she brought with her down into that dark, dingy lair. She became important to him incrementally, until he was comfortable introducing her to his family as a friend. And those feelings had just grown from there. 

Because Felicity was always there for him. She cared about him enough to tell him when she thought he was doing the wrong thing. She’d driven into the mountains, in the middle of the night, on the off-chance that he was there, just to make sure he was okay. She asked for very little in return, just respect and friendship and a chance to make her own decisions. 

She’d been right, earlier. She’d taken him to task for making the decisions about them having a relationship all on his own. Oliver had gotten caught in the belief he was doing the right thing to keep her safe but he’d forgotten her own agency which he knew was so important to her. When she’d left his office, his first concern had been losing her friendship and support. 

But then she’d assured him that she was sticking by his side, no matter what. That gave him hope. He still had that hope now, but the question of how to evolve them from this limbo they were in as partners and friends and two people who were attracted to one another into an actual relationship loomed large. 

Felicity had called him a fool and she was right. He could almost hear Diggle’s chuckling in his head. He would tell him that of course he was a fool, but the bigger question was how was he going to fix it. 

He could always ask Felicity out on a date, he supposed. But after that scene in his office earlier, he wondered how well she’d receive that. No, it was probably better to move slower on this, maybe put his rusty flirting skills to work here in the office and in the foundry as well. He could bring her flowers at the foundry, coffee here at work… offer to give her rides, talk to her about more personal things… 

That last thing, that’s what he wanted the most. He knew painfully little about Felicity. He knew she’d grown up with a single mother, that her mother was a cocktail waitress in Vegas, that she’d gone to school at MIT and graduated super early with two Master’s degrees. He knew she was smart, possibly smarter than anyone else he’d ever known. He admired that… no, actually, he loved that about her, her big brain, and he wanted to know more about how that big brain worked. Did she like cats or dogs? What was her favorite movie? When did she have her first kiss? 

Oliver couldn’t wait to find those things out, but he knew he had to tread carefully. He’d screwed up today, big time. Felicity was hurt and if he came on too strong, she’d be confused. So as much as he wanted to get on his Ducati and ride over to her apartment tonight, he was going to wait. He would do this right because Felicity was worth it. Oliver had a feeling that falling for her meant more than just a casual relationship, not that she would accept that anyhow. She’d made her feelings abundantly clear. And he was more than a little surprised to realize that the prospect of having that with her was something he wanted too. With her, he could see it working. 

Falling in love with Felicity was a forever kind of deal. And if he wanted a shot at that forever, at a life he’d never thought he’d be able to actually _have_ , then he had to be careful. Maybe he’d ask Dig for some advice tomorrow morning. Or, considering how protective the older man felt for Felicity, maybe not. Maybe he could ask Thea for advice instead. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about that! But with five chapters left, you had to know that it wouldn't all resolved that quickly or easily, right? These two need to actually TALK first.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just when you think things are already terrible, that's when the shit really hits the fan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter gave my beta more fits than any other chapter (so far, at least, she's still working on the last two chapters). I want to apologize to her and take this moment to again praise the-silverforked-sky for being patient and amazing and always having the perfect suggestions. She points out things I don't notice or realize and gives me great incentive to want to make this story as best as it can be for you guys. She's the big hero here. 
> 
> Also, a big thangs for fistis for providing the fanart. Such talent! 
> 
> On with the show...

Felicity woke up the next day with a pounding in her head. She’d had more than a couple glasses of wine last night, trying to wind down after the long day at work. She’d seriously underestimated how hard it would be to pretend like everything was fine and her heart wasn’t shattering inside her chest as she worked with Oliver at QC and later, at the foundry. 

She hadn’t done a great job at hiding it, apparently, because Dig had asked her what was wrong while Oliver was getting changed into his leathers so they could go out on patrol. The man missed nothing, which is probably what made him such a good bodyguard. And a teammate. There was no one else she’d want out there, having Oliver’s back.Still, right in that moment, she’d wished he wasn’t so observant. 

It’d taken a little doing to convince him she was fine and Felicity still wasn’t sure she’d managed it. If Oliver hadn’t joined them then, ready to hit the streets, she suspected Dig would have pressed the issue. As soon as the men left, Felicity blew out a relieved breath. Without them there, she could relax some and just do her job. Without Oliver there, doing reps on the salmon ladder or something equally distracting, she could actually pretend like she could do this and halfway believe it. 

Maybe she could ask Oliver if she could work remotely, patch in from home. 

In the light of day (and with her head pounding the way it was), the idea was laughable. But at the time, she’d thought it had merit. Felicity had ended up leaving the foundry before the guys made it back from patrol, telling them over the comms that she was still tired from the trip to Russia and she’d see them tomorrow. 

It wasn’t all a lie. She had been pretty tired. But not so tired as she didn’t curl up in front of her TV with a pint of mint chip, a DVR full of television episodes she needed to catch up on, and a bottle of her favorite red wine. When she’d finally turned off the tv and headed to bed, the pint of ice cream was gone, the wine was gone and she was swaying on her feet, feeling delightfully fuzzy. 

Apparently, this morning, she would be paying for that delightfulness. Which made sense, because she couldn’t have anything good in her life without paying the price for it later on. Sighing, she rolled over and fought the urge to bury her head underneath her pillow and ignore the day. No, she needed to get up, take her shower, and get to QC. The sooner she started this day, the sooner it’d be over. At least she hoped that’s how it worked. As she shuffled into the bathroom that adjoined her bedroom, she wasn’t so sure. 

Her shower helped perk her back up some. The aspirin she swallowed before she stepped under the spray helped even more. She let her thoughts wander as she washed her hair, as she usually did. She thought about how bold she’d been to think Oliver might be interested in more than just a roll or two in the hay with her. She’d assumed quite a bit in her conversation with him the day before and the memory of it made her wince now. 

She’d apologize to him but she wasn’t wild about bringing up the subject again. Instead, it’d be better to just ignore and move on. He’d made it clear on several occasions now that what he valued most was her partnership and friendship. So that’s what they had. If she had let her heart get broken in the process, well, that was her own dumb fault. 

By the time she stepped out of the shower, Felicity felt melancholy, but also a renewed sense of purpose. She had perspective now, and perspective was always important. She was pretty lucky, all things considered, she had some scorching memories of Oliver in bed that would keep her warm for years. Seriously, the man had _skills_. It wasn’t all bad, right? 

She kept giving herself this pep talk as she dressed and did her hair and makeup. By the time she walked out to her kitchen to grab a mug of coffee and a danish from her breadbox, she was almost feeling like her old, chipper self again. Mind over matter. That’s how she’d deal with this. No problem, she thought. 

The scent of the coffee brewing in her Keurig filled her kitchen and helped wake up her senses even more. The sun was shining outside her kitchen window and there was even a bird at the tree just outside, chirping away happily. It was as though the world was telling her, “It’s okay, it’s a new day and everything will be fine.”

It wasn’t until she was taking her first sip of her coffee that Felicity realized that sometimes appearances could be misleading and maybe this day wasn’t going to be so great after all. 

She was perusing the usual local news sites from her phone as she drank her coffee, just like she did every morning. There was a news story, exclusive to the Starling Journal, that caught her eye and made her stomach drop to somewhere around her knees. 

 

**BACK TO HIS ROOTS? QUEEN CONSOLIDATED CEO HAVING AFFAIR WITH HIS SECRETARY!**

**Those of us who remember Oliver Queen from before his famous shipwreck six years ago also remember his tabloid reputation. A different woman on his arm each week, cheating on his longtime girlfriend, fights with paparazzi and drunken antics made headlines on a near-weekly basis. Since returning to Starling City last year, it seemed Queen had toned things down, perhaps even grown up. He even came in to help out the family company, Queen Consolidated, which employs 30,000 of Starling’s own inhabitants, when they were in danger of a hostile takeover.**

**Its come to our attention, from a reliable but anonymous source, that perhaps Queen hasn’t totally cleaned up his act just yet. Last week, the Queen family scion jetted off to Moscow to visit some of the family holdings there. He brought along his young, beautiful executive assistant, Felicity Smoak. There have been rumors about the two since Queen promoted her from lowly IT worker to his own personal executive assistant when he returned home from vacation last month. Now, we’ve learned that there is more to these two than just rumors. The two were spotted leaving a hotel room together, hand in hand and clearly up to more than just business.**

**Is this a serious relationship or is it a convenient fling reminiscent of the womanizer we knew years ago? What does this mean for the struggling Queen Consolidated? One has to wonder if this inappropriate relationship will sway investors to pull out of the company, given Stellmoor International a leg up to dismantle this once proud institution? What does Starling’s own prince have to say about his actions? The Starling Journal will endeavor to answer all these questions in the days to come.**

**For more information about just who this “Felicity Smoak” is and the hints about her humble past (is she a gold digger?), turn to page 6.**

 

 

Felicity just barely glanced at page 6 before she threw her phone down on the counter. She was shaking all over, the rage and humiliation and horror washing over her repeatedly until she had to reach out a hand to brace herself against the counter so she didn’t crumble to the floor. Accompanying the article were a few pictures, most of them boarding the jet in Moscow. One, however, was taken in the hotel hallway as they’d walked towards the elevators. That meant only one person could have leaked this story because only one other person was in that hall with them. 

With shaking hands, Felicity grabbed her keys, phone and her purse, discarding the rest of her coffee and the danish she’d set out for herself.She had to get to Queen Consolidated right away, see if Oliver knew about this story and figure out just what they could do about this. Was it too late to stop the fallout?

Her cheeks burned as she drove towards QC. She felt mortified, every nerve on her body cringing against the humiliation. The insinuations in that article were lurid, that was true. But more than that was the questions about how this might ruin Queen Consolidated for good. If she ended up being responsible for this company, for Oliver’s family’s company being destroyed then she would never forgive herself. 

She’d _known_ Isabel was going to do something. She’d just never thought it would be _this_. 

“This is bad,” she muttered to herself as she navigated the downtown traffic. “This is really, really bad.”

But then, it got so, so much worse. 

As she neared QC, she saw a crowd of reporters just outside the lobby entrance and she knew just what they were there for. There went any hope she had of this story staying small and localized. 

She pulled her Mini into the parking garage, glad that the reporters hadn’t yet swarmed that entrance. As soon as she parked, she pulled out her phone and noticed a few notifications from Dig and one from Oliver as well. 

“Frack,” she whispered as she hurried to the bank of elevators. She had to switch elevators in the lobby, and as she hurried to the executive elevator, she could see the reporters just outside the doors and the security team huddled nearby discussing what to do. “Frack, frack, frack.”

By the time she arrived at her and Oliver’s offices, she was a nervous wreck. Oliver and Dig were in Oliver’s office, shoulder to shoulder, their heads bowed as they conferred. Oliver clutched a copy of today’s Starling Journal in his fist, which made Felicity’s stomach churn. She took a deep breath and then pushed into Oliver’s office. 

Both men whirled around to watch her as she entered. 

“Felicity! You’re finally here,” Dig said. “Didn’t you get my texts?”

“Not till I arrived… I don’t text and drive, Dig, you know that.”

“Felicity, did you see—?” Oliver asked, holding out the paper, his eyes dark and his jaw set. 

“That questionable representation of modern journalism that the Starling Journal put out this morning? Yes, yes I did.”

“I swear to fucking god, if I get my hands on whoever—“

Felicity interrupted him. “Did you know there’s a swarm of reporters gathered outside this building? Apparently, it’s because I’m ruining your company.”

“You are _not_ ruining this company,” Oliver insisted, but his stormy expression told her he was worried. 

“But what if this article does sway the board, Oliver? Isabel is the one who leaked this story, and she did it for a reason. She did it because she knew the outcome would be in her favor.”

“Wait, how do you know Isabel is the one who leaked this?” Dig asked. 

Felicity cut a look over to him. “Because. She is the one who was in the hallway when we came out of my room. She’s the only one who could have taken this picture of us.” She jabbed at the paper Oliver was holding, at the article, and more specifically, the picture of her and him walking down the hallway hand in hand. 

Dig’s eyebrows raised. “So wait, this article is true?”

“It’s true that we did leave a hotel room together,” Felicity said, suddenly unsure how to proceed. Dig knew about what happened after the Undertaking, that was true, but did she really want to get into what happened in Russia too? She looked over to Oliver to gauge his reaction and was surprised to see a dark look on his face. He looked absolutely _furious_. 

“That bitch,” he growled, throwing the paper down on the floor. 

“Wait, you didn’t know she did this?” Felicity asked him. 

“I hadn’t thought about it, to be honest,” Oliver admitted. “But it makes perfect sense. This has her finger prints all over it.”

“What is this woman’s deal? Why does she have it in so bad for you both?” Dig wanted to know. 

“She hates me,” Felicity said with a shrug, “and she has since she met me. I’m not entirely sure why. But let’s not make any mistake. Hurting me with this is just a bonus. This—“ She pointed at the paper again, where it now lay wadded up on the floor, “—is all about business. She wants Queen Consolidated and clearly she will stoop to any level to get it.”

Oliver paced the length of his office. “Can we stop her?” he asked. “Is there anything we can do to stem this?”

Felicity already had her tablet out. What she saw as she scanned the web alerts made her heart sink. “The story has gone national, spreading from internet sites to the larger news outlets. I can’t remove the stories now without it being obvious that the stories were taken down.”

“Fuck,” he grumbled. “I want to—” 

“Suit up and go punch something?” Dig supplied. 

“Preferably her.” Oliver continued pacing, his entire frame vibrating with barely restrained fury. 

Felicity bit her lip as she watched him. “Oliver, I’m sorry—“

He whirled on her, his eyes still flashing with anger. “I should have known her coming to Russia with us was a mistake. Shit!”

She shrank back. Was Oliver ashamed that they’d gotten caught by Isabel? He was clearly furious about her leaking this story, and for good reason. Felicity was upset about it too. But something about his reaction was taking it a step further. She suddenly felt both small and in the way, all at the same time. 

“Maybe we should talk to QC PR?” she suggested weakly. She saw Dig watching her, a gentle expression on his face and she had to look away. 

“Yes! I’ll call down to PR and see if I can meet with them, see if we can head off this nightmare before the roof falls in.” Oliver crossed the room in long strides, reaching his desk and lifting the receiver of his phone. 

Dig touched her shoulder. “You okay?” he asked her while Oliver spoke on the phone.

“Honestly? I don’t know if I am or not,” she replied quietly. 

Dig gave her a sympathetic smile, squeezing her shoulder. Felicity was afraid to say anything for fear she might start crying. The stress of the morning was quickly catching up with her. 

Oliver hung up the phone. “PR is coming up.”

Felicity lifted her tablet again. “You want me to block off the meeting in your schedule?”

“Yes. And block it off in yours too.”

“Mine? Why mine?”

“Because,” Oliver said. “PR wants to meet with you too.”

_Frack_. She should have seen that coming. 

“Why don’t you set up the conference room,” he suggested. “I need to make a call really quick, before they arrive.” 

Felicity took Dig with her and together they set out water and bagels in the conference room and she tried not to let her concerns get away with her too much. But something fishy was going on here and it wasn’t just about Isabel’s machinations, either. 

***

Felicity sat at the conference table in the room that adjoined Oliver’s office, ram-rod straight in her chair, her hands folded on the table in front of her. Her attention was focused on the head of the PR department, Michelle Michaelson, who sat across from her. Oliver sat next to her and the other two PR people sat next to Ms. Michaelson. All of them were reading through the company bylaws, making sure that what the paper was accusing her and Oliver of wasn’t against any rules. 

So far, it was looking good for them. There were no rules against fraternization so long as affairs weren’t carried at work or on the company clock. She and Oliver had, technically, been on their own time that night in Russia and obviously hadn’t been anywhere near the office. 

“However,” Ms. Michaelson was saying, “combined with the rumors that have been circulating about you both since Ms. Smoak was hired as your executive assistant, I’m fairly certain that a case can be made for suspicion of an affair on company premises.”

_Not good, not good, not good…_

“Does our word that nothing has ever happened in the office carry any weight at all?” Oliver asked. 

“Would you be willing to back that up, Ms. Smoak?” 

“Absolutely,” she said without hesitation. “But, isn’t the bigger question here whether or not rumors about the affair are even true, regardless of what the pictures showed?”

Ms. Michaelson raised an eyebrow and looked to Oliver. “I’d just assumed, when we set this meeting up, that the basis for that article was factual. Is it, Mr. Queen?”

He locked eyes with Felicity and she fully expected him to deny it. She was ready to deny it too. What had happened between them, both times, was a lapse in judgement. Or, at least, that’s what it was from his perspective. He’d made that pretty clear to her yesterday… it was a mistake, it shouldn’t have happened, it won’t happen again. He hadn’t said in as many words, but the intention behind what he had said had been clear to her. 

“It is,” Oliver said and Felicity felt her jaw drop open. “I have been having an affair with Ms. Smoak, on and off again, since May of this year.”

She could hear her own heart racing in her ears as everything else in the room grew more muffled. She could see Ms. Michaelson’s mouth moving, the other PR people talking, Oliver nodding and replying. But all she could hear was the steady thud of her own heart. He’d confirmed it? But… why? What purpose could he possibly have to confirm it? After what he’d told her yesterday she’d been absolutely sure he’d want this swept under the rug. 

Felicity swallowed down the bile that had risen in her throat and reached with a shaking hand for the glass of water that sat in front of her. She took a long drink, until her pulse relaxed and she could once again hear the people in the room. 

“But no improprieties have ever once taken place on Queen Consolidated property?” one of the other PR people was asking. He was looking directly at Felicity. 

She shook her head. “No, not once. 

“Both times were off-site, off the clock, on our own time.”

“I see.” The man, Carl Federly was his name, she believed, scribbled something onto his notepad. “And will there be more times? Or is the affair over?”

Oliver looked at her and Felicity tried to tear her eyes away from his but it was impossible. He was looking at her with the strangest expression on his face. She’d always been so good at reading him, but right now, she had no idea what he was thinking. 

“I can’t promise that its over,” he said, keeping his eyes on hers. 

Felicity gaped at him. She couldn’t believe he was saying any of this. After yesterday… 

“To be honest with you all, I’d need to discuss this more with Ms. Smoak herself before discussing it with you,” he went on to say. 

“I see,” Ms. Michaelson said. “Well, I think our best advice, what is likely to limit the damage to the company in both the short and the longterm is to terminate Ms. Smoak’s employment. That is, if you have any intention of continuing this relationship.”

Her breath caught in her throat. Five minutes ago she would have been absolutely, 100% certain that the answer to that was no. But now… she wasn’t sure. She wasn’t sure at all. And she had absolutely _no_ idea what Oliver was up to. What was he _thinking_?

“Are you certain that’s the best course of action?” he asked, meeting every one of the PR teams’ eyes. 

“For the best interest of the company, yes.” 

Felicity felt her heart drop for what felt like the fortieth time that day. She couldn’t believe this was actually being discussed realistically, that she might actually lose her job over this. He met her eyes and she raised her eyebrows at him, silently asking him what the hell he was doing. Why was he hesitating? The answer to whether or not to fire her was obviously no, right? He looked conflicted, like he was caught in a hard decision, not like he was confused or unsure. She felt like she was going to be sick.

“May I have a few minutes to speak to Ms. Smoak privately?” 

“Yes, go on ahead,” Ms. Michaelson said. 

“My office?” he suggested. 

Felicity just nodded, stunned. Maybe now she’d find out what the hell he was thinking. She hoped like hell this was all a joke.

***

Oliver felt all his promises to himself from the night before about going slow with Felicity crashing down around him as he lead her back into his office. This was so much like their conversation the day before that it gave him a case of nerves. He prayed that he didn’t mess this up as badly as he’d messed _that_ up. 

He fogged the windows again, to give them some privacy, but this time they didn’t sit. Felicity stood, leaning against the edge of his desk and he stood in front of her. She was waiting for him to talk, to explain what he’d been telling the PR team in the conference room, but he was having a hard time finding the words. Seeing the pain on her face back in that room, at the suggestion that she’d lose her job, had made him feel like the biggest villain in the world. He needed to talk with her, to explain as best he could, so that he didn’t hurt her more than he already had.

He couldn’t just blurt out that he was rethinking his stance on their relationship because he still wanted to be extra careful. Plus, right now wasn’t the time to bring this up. If he laid his heart out to her right now, he’d probably only succeed in chasing her away, perhaps even for good. He couldn’t risk that. 

“What the hell is going on, Oliver?” Felicity asked, barely keeping her voice down. “Why didn’t you tell them that it’d never happen again.”

“I didn’t want to lie to you, or to them. I can’t promise it’d never happen again because I don’t know if that’s true,” he explained.

She looked confused. “I thought you were pretty clear yesterday that it is true. Why are you saying this? Is this about saving the company?”

_Easy, Oliver. Take it easy._ “No, it’s not _just_ about saving the company, but it _is_ important that I keep Queen Consolidated’s image in mind. I am the CEO, after all. I need employees and investors to trust me and how can I expect that if I'm hiding truths and lying. At least about the things that impact this company.”

Felicity’s face fell. “So that means firing me?”

“Of course not! Felicity, I do not want that.”

“But you’re considering firing me!”

“Because they said it was the only way to handle this without damage to the company.”

“And is the company all that matters here?” Her eyes were shining and Oliver felt his stomach twist.

“No, of course not, but… I have a lot to consider here, Felicity. Weren’t you the one who brought me back so that I could save this company and all these jobs?” He couldn’t resist pointing that out, even as her brows drew together. 

“Yeah, but I didn’t think that meant lying to the company PR department and firing me!” she cried. 

_It’s not lying._ He had to tread very carefully here. “I’m not lying,” he insisted. “As for you, I thought you hated this job. You were furious with me when I promoted you to be my EA.”

“I was furious! I still am! But how is _firing me_ any improvement? This… this just makes me look like some sort of two bit floozy.”

“You are _not_ a two bit floozy, Felicity.”

“But that’s how this looks! Don’t you see it, Oliver? Rumors are published that we are having an affair that could take down this entire company and then the next news is that I’m _fired_?” 

He held up a hand. “Felicity it's not going to be as bad as all that. You know I wouldn't let them make it sound like that.”

“It is going to be _that_ bad! Why couldn’t you just tell Ms. Michaelson and the rest of the PR team that this wouldn’t happen again between us? Didn’t we just agree yesterday that we would continue on platonically and professionally?” 

“We did…” Oliver could tell he was losing ground here, but he had no idea how to gain it back.

“So what happened in there?” she asked, gesturing towards the conference room. “Can’t you go back in there and tell them that you misspoke? That it’ll never happen again?”

“I could but I told you, Felicity, I don’t want to potentially lie. This company was too important.”

She stared at him, her cheeks flushed with anger and her eyes snapping. Clearly, she didn’t quite see what he was saying and Oliver was rather grateful for that. He didn't want to make any important declaration like this when they're both in such a state and in QC surrounded by all these people. Plus, saying the company is too important is a horrible way to make a love declaration. If she’d just let him _explain_ , then he was sure he could put her at ease. In the meantime, he was struggling not to appreciate too much just how glorious she looked when she was angry like this. It made him want to grab her and push her up against a wall, kiss her senseless. 

He _knew_ that move wouldn’t be well received right now. 

“I can’t believe you want to fire me,” she said, her face falling a little. 

Oliver panicked at the note of hurt he heard in her voice. “No, Felicity… If you’d just let me _explain—_ “

“Explain what? How you told me in technicolor detail yesterday that you couldn’t be both the Arrow and be with me? Or are you going to tell me again about how what happened in Russia was a mistake?”

Now he was starting to get angry. “I never said it was a mistake.”

“No, you just said that you didn’t want me to get the ‘wrong ideas’ about it. I forgot. Yeah, that’s so much better.”

“Felicity, you know I didn’t mean it like that…”

“Actually, I have _no_ idea what you meant, because you won’t actually tell me. I told you yesterday, Oliver, that I wasn’t going to allow you to jerk me around anymore. And this all feels an awful lot like jerking me around.”

“I’m not trying to jerk you around, Felicity.”

“Are you ready to talk, then? Because I’m more than happy to sit down here and talk this out with you. You’ve always known you can come talk to me and I would listen.”

“I know,” he said, feeling his heart squeeze in his chest. 

“So, are you ready now?”

Oliver felt torn. He really didn’t want to push this right now. And he knew that if they sat down to talk, he might end up pouring out his feelings too soon. Or, even worse, he’d say the wrong thing again and that would send her away for good this time. What he really wanted to do was just… wait. He wanted the timing to be perfect and while _perfect_ might be asking a lot, given their lifestyle, surely anything had to be better than here in his office with the PR people lurking in the next room.

“Felicity, I don’t think right now is the right time...” he told her, trailing off as he saw her expression change. Her face crumpled for a moment before she smoothed it out. She nodded, averting her eyes. He could see she was hurt again and hated himself a little more for it. 

“Okay, fine,” she said, her tone clipped. “I guess I’m fired then.” 

She started walking towards the door and he followed after her automatically. “Felicity…” 

“Nope, don’t want to hear it. Just bring a box of my stuff to the foundry, I don’t feel like doing the walk of shame through the lobby right now.”

“Felicity,” he tried again. 

“I’m going to go have a drink. I don’t even care that it’s not even noon yet. Tommy will pour for me, I know he will. Or Thea will. _Somebody_ will, dammit, or I’ll pour for myself,” she grumbled under her breath, but he heard every word. 

“Please, can’t we just talk about this?” he asked as she gathered her purse and headed towards the elevators. 

“Nope! Not until you’re ready to talk about what matters. You know where to find me when you are. See you at the foundry.”

Oliver watched her go, his heart heavy. She wouldn’t stay unless he was ready to talk, so he had to let her go.He knew what he had to say to get her to stay but now was not the right time. They desperately needed to have a talk... and she need to know that he was rethinking what he’d said to her before. But he didn’t want to be having that conversation here and now. Frustration burned at him as he walked back into the conference room. Three heads turned towards him expectantly and he didn’t take a seat again, instead standing at the head of the table.

“Ms. Smoak just resigned, so letting her go won’t be necessary. You can go ahead and draft a press release indicating she’s no longer an employee but please put emphasis on her resigning, not being let go. I don’t want more rumors to circulate about her because of this,” he told them. 

Ms. Michaelson raised a skeptical brow. “I’m not sure we can prevent more rumors, Mr. Queen.”

“Do what you can. Please. She doesn’t deserve to have her reputation tarnished because of this. She’s a smart young woman who was too good to be just an EA. I was selfish, when I promoted her to that position. She has helped me run this company, plain and simple, and I’m not sure how I’ll fare without her.”

“If you don’t mind me asking,” Mr. Federly began, “why let her go at all? You could just say the affair was over and keep her here.”

“To be honest, Mr. Federly… I didn’t want to lie. I don’t want my legacy as CEO of this company to be built on me lying to anyone… you, the media, the investors, the board… or her either. I can’t say the affair is over because I hope that it isn’t.”

The third PR representative, a young woman whose name he wasn’t familiar with, spoke up then. “Can I ask where you see a relationship with Ms. Smoak going in the future?” Ms. Michaelson cleared her throat and the young woman blushed and tried to clarify. “I just mean… if you are working towards something more serious, it might help if we knew that, we can spin the story to the media to be more favorable to that sort of outcome.”

“To be honest Ms…?”

“Hendricks. Janice Hendricks, Mr. Queen.” 

“Ms. Hendricks… I don’t know what the outcome will be. Ms. Smoak is an independent woman with a lot of pride and I’ve disappointed her lately. But I know that I would like our relationship to become more. If she’ll have me. And if she will, I’ll consider myself a very lucky man indeed.”

All three of them stared at him, a little wide eyed. Finally, Ms. Michaelson nodded her head towards him. “Well. Best of luck to you then, Mr. Queen. I do think her leaving the company will be better if that is the outcome you seek with her. Not just from a public relations standpoint, but for your relationship. At least initially.”

“Thank you, Ms. Michaelson. And thank all of you. I appreciate it.” 

Oliver walked them to the elevator and Mr. Federly patted him on the back. “We’ll make sure the press release is clear that Ms. Smoak left of her own free will and play down the drama regarding your affair as much as we can. Do you know if she has any job prospects at the moment? Because that might make it easier to spin.”

Oliver grinned. “Actually, yes she does.” 


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oliver calls on Tommy for a favor and Oliver and Felicity get used to a new normal in their relationship. Oliver wants more now, but he's unsure how exactly to go about it without messing up the best thing in his life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> These last three chapters are probably my favorite of the whole story. I feel like everything really came together in a nice way. This marks the beginning of hte end, folks. This story ends with the events (or rather, shortly thereafter) of 2x07 (I've had several people ask me that in the comments). I am considering a sequel, the rest of s2 in this "verse", to write during NaNoWriMo this year. What are everyone's thoughts on that? The sequel would deal largely with Slade and the havoc he brings with him. It would also introduce some Moira & Felicity interaction. More Thea & Felicity as well (and ALWAYS more Tommy, though I'm less sure what to do with him because I want him to have love but honestly is ANYONE good enough for him besides Felicity?) (the answer is no). 
> 
> Big thanks to fistis for the art and to the-silverforked-sky who has been a most amazing beta for this story. She saved chapter 12, you guys. And her suggestions for this chapter and the next had me constantly going "WHY DIDN'T I THINK OF THAT???" She's truly amazing.

As soon as the PR folks were gone, Oliver hurried back to his desk and picked up his phone. He dialed the number for Tommy’s office over at Merlyn Global, hoping against hope that he caught his friend at his desk and that he wasn’t busy somewhere else. 

“Thomas Merlyn speaking,” a familiar voice said on the other line. 

“‘Thomas’? Seriously?” Oliver couldn’t fight the grin. He’d hated being called Thomas in school when they were kids. 

A chuckle. “Hello, Oliver. And yes, I thought it sounded more professional than ‘Tommy’. And I’m _not_ answering the phone ‘Merlyn’. That’s my father and just… no.”

“Don’t blame you there.Hey listen, I wanted to give you a heads up.” Oliver played with a red pen on his desk, twirling it around his fingers before setting it back in the pen tray.

“Oh? What’s going on?”

“Its Felicity.”

“Ohhhh,” Tommy said knowingly. “Okay. And what does the lovely Ms. Smoak have to do with me?”

“Don’t play coy with me, Tommy. I know how you got that ‘A’ in Geometry in 10 th grade.” 

Tommy’s chuckle was deep. “Okay, you got me. So what’s up with Felicity?”

“First, she’s on her way to Verdant right now.”

“Right _now_? But it’s only 11 in the morning.” 

“I know. Listen… could you do me a favor?” he asked. 

“Sure thing, buddy.”

“She needs someone to talk to and I desperately want to be that person but I don’t think she wants to see me right now. Plus, I have some paperwork here that I need to make sure PR doesn’t screw up.”

“I’d be happy to. Does this have anything to do with that call you made to me earlier?”

“As a matter of fact, it does.”

“Understood. And, by the way, all systems are go on that front,” Tommy assured him. “HR just faxed me the paperwork ten minutes ago.”

Oliver could hear scuffling on the other line. “Are you on your way there right now?” 

“Yes, I’m leaving the office… Justine? Hold my calls while I’m out, call my cell if anything important comes up.”

“Okay, good. She said she was perfectly willing to pour her own drinks but I’d feel much better if someone was there with her.” Oliver itched to go there himself, to talk to her, but he knew his face was the last she’d want to see right now.

“I got you, buddy. I get it and I don’t want her alone if she’s feeling the need for a drink either. Which brings me to my first question: what did you do to her to make her want a drink before noon on a weekday?” 

Oliver grimaced. “I never said I did anything wrong.” The problem with Tommy knowing him as well as he did was him knowing that it was something _he_ had done wrong. 

“I’m starting to get an idea here. You calling me about offering Felicity that position and now she’s looking for a drink...” Tommy said.

“You’re quite perceptive.”

“Okay. Well, like I told you this morning, I meant it when I said I wanted to steal Felicity away from QC to be my VP of Technology.”He paused for a moment. “I take this to mean that Felicity needs a job?

“Did you happen to see the headline in the Starling Journal this morning?” Oliver wanted to know. 

“No, didn’t have a chance to look at the paper this morning. Let me look it up on my phone.” There was a long pause and then a low whistle. “Oh, holy shit, Oliver. Is this article _true_?” 

“It’s based in truth, which is bad enough. Isabel Rochev leaked it, because she wants her greedy mitts on QC.”

Tommy groaned. “Let me guess. Your people at QC have advised you to let her go to minimize the fallout and lessen Isabel’s chances of destabilizing the company’s image.”

“Damn, Tommy, you really are getting good at this CEO business.And yes, that’s exactly what happened. I didn’t actually fire her, but Felicity didn’t take the suggestion very well.”

“I imagine she wouldn’t! Why didn’t you just deny the rumors?”

“Because they’re true and I didn’t want to lie. And because I want to see if I can have a relationship with Felicity.”

“Oh, shit! You’re actually doing it, buddy! I was starting to think you’d never get up the balls to make a move!”

“Technically, I made a move in Russia.”

A snort echoed over the line and Oliver listened as Tommy started up his car and plugged his phone into the handsfree device. “That wasn’t a move, Ollie. That was a booty call. So does this mean you do have feelings for her?”

Oliver sighed. “Yes, I do.”

“So then what’s the problem?”

“The problem is… I haven’t told her yet. Things went sideways after Russia and I said some stupid stuff.”

“Tell me you didn’t do the old ‘this life is dangerous so I can’t be with someone I could really care about’ thing? Please tell me that, Ollie.”

“That’s more or less what I told her.”

His friend groaned again. “Oh, Ollie. That’s such a typical superhero thing to say.”

“What?”

“Didn’t you read comic books growing up? Wait, I know you did, because I never got my Iron Man collection back from you in fifth grade.”

“Tommy, just tell me, does she have a job at Merlyn Global or not?”

“Of course, Ollie. I told you this morning, that I’d snap her up in a heartbeat. You were wasting her talent there at QC, you know.”

“I know,” Oliver said, feeling that old familiar guilt again.

Tommy sighed. “Okay, well I’m nearly to Verdant. I’ll talk to her, offer her the job. Pretty sure she’ll finally take me up on it now.”

“Thanks, Tommy.”

“What else do I tell her? About you, I mean. Do you want me to put in a good word?”

Oliver appreciated that Tommy would do that for him more than he could say. “You don’t have to do that, Tommy. I’ll talk to her. I just… want to give her a chance to cool down first.”

“Okay, I get that. I’ll shoot you a text after I talk with her, tell you how it goes.”

“Thanks, man.”

***

Tommy drove towards Verdant as quickly as he could. Luckily, the morning traffic had already cleared out and the streets were pretty clear. He arrived at the old Queen Industries steel factory, hoping that he’d beat Felicity there, but his hopes fell when he saw her red Mini parked out front. 

He felt conflicted about Oliver’s phone call as he parked his Mercedes next to her dinky car. He was worried about Felicity, wanting to make sure she was okay and hoping he could lift her spirits. But he also felt relief that Oliver had called him at all. Not just to let him know where Felicity was headed, but that morning, asking if the offer to bring Felicity on board at Merlyn Global was still open. It was less about being able to help and a little more about Oliver feeling that he _could_ talk to Tommy about this. 

Their friendship had slowly been rebounding in the last weeks since Oliver’s return. They’d both been too busy to spend too much time together, but they texted and spoke on the phone occasionally. While they were still very careful around each other, Tommy could tell Oliver was on his best behavior just as much as he was, they were slowly returning to their old familiar ease with one another. 

Tommy wasn’t as angry as he had been right after the Undertaking. He’d blamed Oliver for Laurel’s death and even at the time he’d known it was unfair. But his grief was so overwhelming that logic and sense had very little precedence. Thank goodness he’d had Felicity around to keep his head on straight. She truly was an amazing friend and as much as he found her attractive, he was so glad that it seemed Oliver was finally waking up to what he had right in front of him. Despite their ups and downs, he thought Oliver did deserve some happiness in his life, a _life_ beyond his vigilante mission. He was surprised to find he felt a little proud of his best friend, at what he was doing and how he’d changed his approach since coming back to Starling. He wasn’t killing anymore and he was saving people in this city. It was noble but Oliver deserved a lot more than just a noble mission; he deserved a life. They all deserved a life. And Tommy figured it was about time he moved on with his, too. 

He pushed into the side door at Verdant, back by the stock room, carrying the envelope he’d grabbed off his desk on his way out. Thank goodness HR moved fast. As he entered the main club, he saw Felicity, perched on a barstool, swinging her feet. She’d kicked her heels off, leaving her feet bare. In front of her, instead of a bottle and a shot glass, was a mug full of water. She was humming something off-key to herself. 

“Hey, gorgeous,” Tommy greeted her, carefully approaching. 

She turned her head and smiled at him, but it was a sad smile. “Hey Tommy. Did he tell you to come here and watch over me?”

He thought for an instant about playing dumb but then thought it might not be a great idea to insult her intelligence. He really did want her to work for him, after all. 

“What gave it away? The fact that it’s not even noon on a normal work day or the fact that I’m in a three piece suit. Or is it both?” he asked her with a grin. He perched on the barstool next to her. 

“I think it’s both.”

“If nothing else, it should prove to you how much he really does care about you,” Tommy ventured. 

Felicity scoffed and took a long drink of her water. “Lets not go there.”

Okay, yes, she was definitely mad at his best friend. “Okay. So you decided to come here in the middle of the day for… water?”

She shrugged a shoulder. “I came here to have a drink but then I realized… I don’t want to have a drink. I’ve had enough drinks and they haven’t helped anything. I just… needed somewhere to go, some distraction.”

Tommy sat back and patted his chest. “Well, you’re in luck, Smoak, because here I am. Did you now Moira once referred to me as a world-class distraction for Oliver when I would drag him out to parties instead of leaving him at home to study for the SATs?”

She smiled a little, it was a start. “At least you come with solid references.”

“I also come with a job offer,” he said, leaning back towards her. 

Her eyes widened behind her glasses. “Tommy…”

“You remember when I tried to convince you to come to work with me at Merlyn Global, right? But you said you felt loyal to QC and I understood that. But now… You’re a free agent and that offer still stands.”

“It does?”

“Yep. I want you to be my new Vice President of Technology. Lord knows, I need someone to clean up the tech departments and get us on the right track towards advancing this company into the future. I think you’re just the girl for the job.”

Her cheeks turned the most darling shade of pink. “VP? Of Technology? Seriously?”

“Seriously. Listen, I didn’t make this decision lightly. I consulted with HR and the board at Merlyn Global and they ran your qualifications. By the way, they all agreed that it was a travesty you were rotting away in the IT department at QC all this time, because you are vastly overqualified for that job.”

She looked stunned, so he continued. “I don’t want you to take this lightly either. But I want you to know that this is a real offer I’m making.” He pushed the envelope of papers across the bar towards her. He’d had HR draw them up after his conversation with Oliver earlier that morning and had just barely remembered to grab them on his way out of the office. 

Felicity opened the envelope and pulled out the sheaf of papers. Tommy watched as she read through each page. He knew when she arrived at the salary offer by the way her eyes bulged. “Holy frack,” she breathed, and she read through the rest of it fairly quickly. 

“Well?” Tommy prompted when she’d reached the last page. 

She lifted her eyes to his and he saw they were glassy with unshed tears. She blinked them back. “This is too much,” she told him. 

“No. It’s just enough. Maybe even not enough, but we’ll renegotiate after your first year.” He winked. 

“I would be overseeing R&D and IT… and take part in regular meetings concerning the future plans for Merlyn Global?”

“Yep. You’d be my right hand woman. I need you, Smoak. This is my one and only chance to steal you away from Ollie.”

“You certainly are giving it your best effort,” she murmured, leafing through the pages again. 

“Don’t keep me hanging here, future VP of Merlyn Global.”

Felicity blew out a breath and when she looked up, she was smiling. “I’ll take it.”

Tommy didn’t even try to fight the grin that threatened to split his face. “You will?”

“With these terms, I’d be crazy not to. A car service? Seriously?”

“It’s nice not to have to drive yourself into work everyday.”

“Wow. Just… wow. I could afford to move into a nicer place, buy nicer clothes, shoes… Oh, god, Tommy! I would get to work with amazing equipment and develop tech…! It’s my dream!” 

Tommy laughed at the glint in her eyes. _This_ was what he wanted. He’d wanted her to be happy and smiling. And, of course, he wanted her working at Merlyn Global. Queen Consolidated’s loss was his gain. 

“Fantastic. Why don’t you sign those and I’ll get on the phone with HR and have PR draft a press release. With any luck it’ll go out right about the time QC’s press release goes out.”

She paled a little, hearing that, but took the pen he offered her and he stepped away for a moment to make the call. He also sent a quick text to Oliver: 

 

**She took the job. Utterly thrilled. You should see her face.**

 

A minuted hadn’t even passed before his phone buzzed back at him. 

 

**I wish I could see it. Thanks, Tommy. I owe you a beer.**

 

Tommy shook his head and tapped out a quick reply. 

 

**You don’t owe me anything. In fact, I might owe you something for stealing your girl. ;)**

 

Grinning, he tucked his phone back in his pants pocket. He knew that jab would get under Ollie’s skin. Sure enough, he felt his phone buzz again almost right away but he ignored it as he returned to Felicity. She held out the papers to him. 

“All signed,” she said, smiling. 

“Mind if I go fax these real quick? I want to make sure that press release gets out asap.”

She waved him off. “Sure, go ahead. I’ll keep your seat warm.”

Tommy hurried up to the office where the fax machine sat next to the desk that wasn’t used much by anyone besides Thea. He quickly sent over the signed pages and then called HR to ensure they’d received them. PR called him right away to say they would be able to release a statement before end of work today. He thanked them, hung up, and returned to Felicity. 

“How about we go for celebratory burgers and milkshakes over at Big Belly?” he suggested. 

She smiled again, another genuine, beaming smile. “Let’s do it.”

The burger place was only a couple blocks over, so it was an easy walk. On the way over, Tommy explained that QC will be putting out a press release addressing the news story and in it will mention that she has left her position there. 

“Not fired?” she asked. 

“Nope. Oliver was very specific about that.”

“Interesting.”

“And the good news is, Merlyn Global’s press release goes out tonight so the news that you’re now working for us will hit the waves before the news you’re not working for them. Should alleviate some awkwardness and ridiculous questions, we hope.”

“Yes, let’s hope.”

They grabbed a booth and Tommy placed their orders (Belly Busters, a plate of fries to share and two chocolate milkshakes). 

“This is much better than day drinking,” Felicity said before taking a huge bite of her burger. 

“Six years ago I would have argued you on that, but I think you’re right,” Tommy said around a mouthful of fries. 

“Please tell me you didn’t offer me this job out of pity,” she said suddenly. “I couldn’t stand it if I knew I got this for any reason besides I’m the best person for the job.”

He leaned across the booth towards her. “Felicity, listen to me. I was trying to get you to come to Merlyn Global months ago. I know I joke around a lot, but I was serious then too. You’re too smart for the IT department and you’re sure as hell too smart to be Oliver’s executive assistant. You deserve this job. Plus, all the really important people at Merlyn Global loved the idea of hiring you and they never love any idea I come up with. At least not right off.”

She relaxed, smiling. “Okay. I know I shouldn’t look a gift horse in the mouth but… today was pretty monumentally sucky and it’s hard not to question the good fortune.”

“So, things are not going well between you and Ollie?” he asked, testing the waters. 

Felicity leveled him with a hard look. “I thought I said I didn’t want to go there.”

He held his hands up in surrender. “Just double checking. You know, he didn’t mean to upset you.”

“Tommy…” Her voice was a warning. 

“Okay, I’m dropping it.”

“Good.”

“Except to say that my other offer still stands. If Ollie doesn’t have his head out of his ass by Christmas, I’d love to unwrap you under my tree.”

Felicity burst out laughing. “Oh my god, Tommy. That’s so corny.”

He just grinned at her. He knew now that it’d never come to that. And that was fine. He wasn’t in love with Felicity. He could see where he could easily fall for her, but… there was no way he was getting in the way of her and his best friend. It wasn’t just about being noble and self-sacrificing, lord knew those weren’t his strengths. But he genuinely didn’t want to come between Oliver and Felicity. Once they got their nonsense sorted out, he had a feeling they’d actually be really good for each other. Plus, they were stupid for each other and Oliver was already removing his head from his ass. If those two weren’t an item by Thanksgiving, which was in a little over a week from now, he’d eat his hat. And Tommy didn’t plan on eating any hats anytime soon. 

***

The streets of Starling City were remarkably quiet over the next few days. The weather was turning cold and rainy and crime was taking it easy as a result. Or maybe it was the upcoming holiday. For whatever reason, the police scanner was silent. 

“There hasn’t even been any gang activity in a few days now,” Felicity remarked from her seat the computers down in the foundry lair. 

“Why do you sound disappointed about that?” Dig asked, amused. “Shouldn’t we be glad criminals are taking a holiday?”

“I _am_ happy, it’s just… weird.” 

“She’s right,” Oliver agreed. “It _is_ weird. But I’m definitely not complaining because my mom’s trial is in a couple days and I’ll feel better being able to focus on that.”

Things between himself and Felicity had been a little strained, but cordial and professional. He could tell that she was avoiding being alone with him, which he had to admit hurt a little even though he understood why she was doing it. He gave her the space she clearly wanted but was starting to wonder just how much space was too much. The last thing he wanted was for her to think that he didn’t care for her. 

Admittedly, Oliver missed her at the office too. It wasn’t just her expertise that he was lacking, but her companionship. In the days since she’d left QC, whenever he’d felt down or just wanted to see her friendly face, he would automatically reach out to call her into his office or look up to the desk just on the other side of the glass walls, expecting to see her. When he realizes she’s gone, the disappointment is keen. Still, he knows what’s happening is better not just for her own future career but for their potential relationship. 

Wanting to show his support, Oliver had sent her a “first day on the job” gift, to be delivered to her office. He hoped she would see the significance, the call back to a moment from their relationship, and not just think it was an impersonal gesture. He’d picked out the fancy coffee maker himself, and found the perfect Doctor Who mug to go with it. He’d held his breath all morning until his phone had rung at his desk with a call from her, thanking him. He could hear the smile in her voice and it eased something in him to hear it. Maybe everything was going to be okay after all, even though he missed her at work. Plus, Oliver was just grateful that she was still on the team, still helping him out. She didn’t mention what had happened at QC and he didn’t bring it up either. Truthfully, he was nervous as hell to talk about it with her. 

He tried talking to Thea the other day, asking for advice. At first, she hadn’t taken him seriously. 

“It’s not nice to tease your little sister,” she had chastised him as they sat in the media room at the Queen mansion, watching some reality tv marathon together. “You know how badly I want you to find someone to fall head over heels for.”

“Thea, I’m not teasing. I’m serious. I need to know what to say to this woman, because I’m scared I’ll say the wrong thing again. I don’t know who else to ask for advice.”

Thea had sent him a sidelong glance. “Wait… what? Who is this woman? And you’re coming to _me_?”

“You’ve always had opinions on my love life in the past, why not now too?”

“So you’re _not_ going to tell me who it is? Unless… is it Felicity? I saw her in the paper with you the other day.” 

Oliver had blushed and that was clearly a dead giveaway. Thea had squealed with delight. “Oh, Felicity is fantastic! I talked to her a few times over the summer and she gave me some great advice. Oh, Ollie, she’s _adorable_.”

“This isn’t giving me advice,” he’d grumbled. 

“Well, what do you want to know, brother dearest?”

Oliver had filled her in as briefly as he could, giving her just the highlights. He’d rather she not know the more sordid details but she seemed to read between the lines easy enough. 

“So, let me get this straight. You slept with her, then took off on your vacation and when you came back, you both agreed to be just friends. Then you slept with her _again_ and now she thinks you aren’t ready to start a relationship but you _are_ and also you fired her?” 

“The official statement is that she resigned. But yes, that’s the gist of it.” It had sounded so much worse to hear it like that. 

“You have your work cut out for you. Give her time, give her patience, but _be_ there for her. Listen to her and support her. From what you’ve said, you guys were friends before all this happened, so remind her of what a good friend you can be for her. Remind her of how good you two are together on that level before trying to bring it to the next.”

It had sounded like good advice but it wasn’t the concrete direction he’d been hoping for. So, for the last few days he felt like he’d been spinning his wheels and not making any progress towards improving his relationship with Felicity. 

Thea had called them friends, but they were really more partners than they were friends. Mostly because he’d been afraid to allow the intimacy of being friends into their relationship. Oliver wasn’t sure, but he thought maybe it was because he knew he could never just be friends with Felicity. But they had been partners, from the first moment he stepped into her cubicle. He’d been a good partner to her, supporting her decisions while they were working in the field and working together so seamlessly. But he hadn’t supported her emotionally very well, and that was his failing with her. He wanted to change that, and he supposed Thea’s advice offered him a way to do that. He just wished there was more he could do than just sit by and give Felicity space. 

“How is your mother doing?” Felicity asked, swiveling in her chair to face him. 

“I went to see her earlier today. She’s putting on a brave face but I know she’s got to be worried.”

“The trial starts at 9am?” Dig asked. 

Oliver nodded, feeling nerves bubble up in his gut again at the thought of his mother on trial for the Undertaking. He knew as well as anyone else that the chances of his mother getting acquitted were slim to none. He couldn’t fathom his mom spending the rest of her life in prison, but what other outcome could he realistically expect?

“I’ll be there with you, man,” Dig promised. 

“Thanks, Dig.” Oliver could never begin to express how grateful he was to have such good friends to support him in this. 

“I wish I could be there for you too,” Felicity said, “but I’m still learning the ropes over at Merlyn Global and I really can’t justify taking the time off so soon after I started.”

“It’s okay, Felicity,” he said, putting a hand on her shoulder. He felt her relax under her touch and tried not to let that get his hopes up too high. “I know you’ll be there in spirit.” Tommy was going to be there, which meant a lot. It was another gesture that meant that maybe their friendship was recovering. 

“Please keep me posted. I’ll be thinking about you and Thea constantly,” she promised. 

His heart warmed to hear that. 

“Well, shall we do some training exercises or go on patrol?” Dig asked. 

“Uh… let’s do a patrol,” Oliver answered. He was itching to get out on the streets, even if things were quiet. Plus, he didn’t want to push his luck around Felicity when she seemed to be warming up to him. 

“I’ve got the comms,” Felicity chirped and Oliver felt a rush of _rightness_. This was how it was supposed to be, the three of them, working together as a well oiled unit. 

***

The next day, Felicity got a call from Dig close to noon. He’d called in a replacement for Oliver and Thea at the courthouse because he woke up feeling sick. But now, as the day wore on, he was getting worried at his symptoms. Felicity had him describe those symptoms to her over the phone and she grew worried too. That wasn’t the flu that was going around… that was something else. 

“I’d like to test your blood,” she told him. “Can you have Lyla drive you to the foundry? I can meet you there.”

“I’ll be there,” he promised. 

She stepped out, telling her new secretary, a pert blonde girl named Tiffany, that she was going out on lunch and she could be reached by phone. She had her car with her today, not quite ready to take full use of the car service. It was a good thing, because it allowed her to drive over to Verdant without anyone asking any questions about why she was going into the Glades to visit a club in the middle of the day. 

Dig was sitting in a chair down in the basement when she arrived. He had a blanket tucked around his shoulders and she could see from the bottom of the stairs that he was drenched in sweat. 

“Dig, you look _terrible_!” she exclaimed, hurrying over to him. 

“Thanks, Felicity. That makes me feel so much better.” He shivered violently and her heart went out to him. 

“I thought you got the flu shot yesterday?” Felicity asked him. 

“I did. I guess it didn’t work.”

She got him a cool cloth and told him to hold it to his head. Then she drew a sample of his blood. While that was in the new analyzer she’d purchased over the summer, she found some of Oliver’s famed herbs and tried to make a tea to see if that would help lower the fever. 

The tea helped a little, but Dig was still clearly suffering. She called up Tiffany and let her know she’d be out the rest of the afternoon and to forward her calls. She felt bad doing that on her third day at a new job, but she really needed to keep an eye on Dig. 

Felicity was starting to worry… there wasn’t much out there that couldn’t be knocked back by those mysterious island herbs. So she shot a text to Oliver, letting him know what was up. He texted back immediately, saying the court was adjourning for the day and he’d be there as soon as he could. 

The results on Dig’s blood work came in just as Oliver was clattering down the stairs. 

“How is he? How are you, Dig?”

Dig was huddled on the med table, the blanket drawn around him, his complexion pale and waxy. He looked even worse than he had when she’d first arrived and her nerves were shot, especially as she read through the results of the blood work. 

“Terrible,” Dig stuttered between teeth chattering. 

“Did you give him some herbs? What’s wrong with him? Should we take him to the hospital?”

Felicity had the local news up on the foundry monitors, as she often did when things were quiet or slow. Before she could tell Oliver what she saw in the blood work results, a special report blared from the computers, drawing all their attention. 

“This is Bethany Snow reporting from the Starling City Courthouse. Moments ago, Assistant District Attorney Adam Donner collapsed just outside chambers, which had been taking a short recess from the trial of Moira Queen. He was complaining earlier of flu-like symptoms but those symptoms worsened. He was just taken by ambulance to Starling General and ADA Joanna de la Vega will be taking over as lead counsel in the State vs Queen trial, reconvening in the morning.”

Felicity looked to Oliver and then to Dig. “That can’t be a coincidence, can it?” 

Oliver’s expression was thunderous. “Unlikely.”

“It gets worse, Oliver,” she said, holding up the blood work results.“I’m seeing a lot of markers in Dig’s blood that are similar with what I found in that ‘energy drink’ you brought me last year.”

“Wait… Vertigo? Are you saying Dig’s under the influence of Vertigo? But I put the Count away… he was a _vegetable_ the last time I saw him. Last I heard, he was locked up in Iron Heights.”

“Oh no,” Felicity mumbled. She had a bad, bad feeling about this. Plopping in front of her computers, her fingers flew over the keyboard as she searched the records at Iron Heights. “No, no, no…”

“What is it?” 

“Remember how the quake damaged the prison and some inmates escaped and Iron Heights never told anyone? And Barton Mathis was one of them?”

“Yeah? Wait, no… are you saying that Count Vertigo is one of the ones who escaped?”

“Yep, I’m saying exactly that. And it looks like he’s cooking up a new batch.”

“But how did Dig get it?”

They both looked to their friend who had fallen into a restless sleep on the med table. “That’s a very good question.”

Just then, the local news broadcast was interrupted. Felicity instinctively grabbed Oliver’s arm as they watched the Count, in the flesh, taunting the citizens of Starling in a hijacked broadcast. He boasted about having a foolproof delivery method, instantly addicting hundreds of Starling City residents and the only cure would be more Vertigo. He demonstrated on poor Adam Donner, who he’d kidnapped from the ambulance and sure enough, the man’s symptoms abated as soon as he was injected. 

“I think I know where that broadcast came from,” she told Oliver as soon as it ended. “That’s the old city records building, I saw the reflection of the seal in his eye.”

Oliver suited up and headed out. She didn’t like him going without Dig as backup, but she stayed on the comms with him and assisted as much as she could. Still, she was relieved when he was able to free Donner and disrupt the Count’s production capabilities. He wasn’t stopped, and they still didn’t know how the Count was distributing the Vertigo, but it was a start. 

Oliver was exhausted when he returned and told her to head on home. He would stay in the foundry with Dig that night, giving Lyla a call to let her know that he was keeping an eye on Dig for her. Felicity hated to leave her friend in need, but she was exhausted too and Oliver would be there. 

The next day, she called in sick to work again. She felt terrible about it, but Dig was more important right now. And getting that Vertigo off the streets was more important too. She called Tommy to explain and he agreed with her. He’d cover for her for the day. 

Felicity arrived at the foundry just as Oliver was leaving to go to the courthouse. “Hey, stranger,” she greeted, handing him a coffee. She’d stopped on her way to pick herself up some sustenance and thought he might appreciate some as well. 

“You’re a lifesaver,” he said, taking a grateful sip. 

“I’m going to do what I can to find out how the Count is distributing this crap today,” she promised. 

“Okay, but promise me you’ll wait for me to get back tonight to make any moves, okay?” 

“Oliver… all I’m doing is my same old computer sleuthing,” she said. “But okay, I promise.”

He winked before headed for the stairs. “That’s all I needed!”

Felicity told the butterflies in her belly that had suddenly swarmed when he winked at her to settle down already. It was just a wink, another sign that things between them were getting back to normal. Nothing more. Satisfied with her little pep talk to herself, she got to work on the foundry computers while Dig napped restlessly on the cot behind her. 


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Felicity has an unfortunate encounter with The Count.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it is! The penultimate chapter of "ready for the fall". Thank you to everyone who has journeyed along with me, shared your feelings and ridden this roller coaster along with me. This is a fave chapter, simply because this is my "moment". This is when Olicity went beyond "oh they're cute together" to "oh my god they're the best couple on the planet". That scene, in the darkened office at QC, Oliver saving her life and then being so gentle with her after... that is what sold me. 
> 
> Anyhow. Big thanks to fistis for the artwork and to the-silverforked-sky for the beta work. 
> 
> Enjoy the chapter!

Felicity ended up doing more office work down in the foundry than sleuthing that morning. But she didn’t feel right about putting off that responsibility. Dig woke up and Felicity heated him up some soup. He felt a little better after a good night’s sleep but was clearly suffering from nasty withdrawal effects. 

Felicity kept one eye on the local news for information from the trial and another on Diggle. She finished with her work responsibilities sometime in the afternoon and refocused on trying to put the pieces together on how Dig got dosed with Vertigo to begin with. 

“Do you think it’s in the water supply?” he asked her. He was sitting next to her, bundled in the blanket but looking a bit more perky than he had been. 

She shook her head. “No… if it was, more people would be affected. Maybe the food?”

“Maybe… but we don’t shop anywhere different. Our supermarket is one of the most popular ones in town. From what the news is saying, only about a hundred people have reported symptoms so far.”

“So more of a limited delivery system… at least so far…”

She sat back and thought about what she knew. Somewhere in there was the puzzle piece she was missing. It wasn’t until she was scanning through the accounts of those infected that she started to see a pattern. Everyone reported flu-like symptoms to start with. Just like Diggle had. Then, she noticed that at least half of those people mentioned having gotten the flu shot the day or two before they got sick. 

“Dig, where’d you get your flu shot?” she asked. 

“It was a mobile clinic van, stopped by QC so I just went downstairs and got the shot, right before lunch.”

“Do you remember the name of the service?”

Dig told her and she typed it in, finding a result right away. It was a new company, associated with a national drugstore chain. She found the route the vans took, saw how it wound through the city, visiting all major places of employment including Merlyn Global. Come to think of it, she recalled seeing a van outside the building the other day when she’d come back from lunch. The thought of getting a shot herself never crossed her mind because she had a thing about needles. 

“Dig, I think this mobile vaccine clinic is distributing the Vertigo. We’ve got to stop them.”

“We should wait until Oliver is here to do anything. I can’t go out in the field right now, Felicity,” he told her. 

“I know. But you need an antidote. I can make an antidote if I get my hands on the Vertigo the Count is using now. It’s a different formula so the samples we have from before haven’t been working to make you feel any better. Even the herbs aren’t doing a good enough job. I need a sample of his current recipe,” Felicity said. 

“I can’t let you go out there alone,” Dig said. 

“Lucky me, you also can’t really stop me right now,” she said with a smile as she got up and grabbed her purse. “Look, all I’m going to do is go to the main office for these vans. It’s after hours, I’ll take a peek around, see if I can get in one of the vans and find a vial. That’s all. I’ll be back here before you know it.”

“Oliver is gonna kill me,” he predicted. 

“No, he’ll kill _me_.” _I’m the one who promised him, after all._ Felicity couldn’t help but feel a little guilty as she left the club and hopped in her car. The sooner she got there, found the Vertigo and got back, the less chance of Oliver returning and getting really mad. She’d much rather apologize after everything was all fixed and better. 

Dig needed her. The whole city needed her. Right now, she was the only one who could do it. 

The main office was just on the outskirts of the Glades. The building was dark and there were several vans parked in the lot. Felicity locked her Mini and got out to have a closer look. Maybe she’d get a chance to brush up on her lock-picking skills. She just needed to be quick because she didn’t want to face Oliver’s wrath if he returned to the lair while she was still out here, fooling around. 

Felicity approached one of the vans and inspected the door. The lock looked pretty standard, the latch pretty simple… she reached out and pressed on the release just to test it and was surprised when the door swung open easily. 

“Oh! That makes it easier,” she muttered to herself as she climbed in. She focused right in on the cabinets that ran the length of the van and in one of them… “Bingo!” There was an entire selection of syringes filled with bright yellow liquid. That was the Vertigo all right. She remembered the color from last year and apparently, the Count liked consistency. 

She lifted a syringe from the box and smiled triumphantly at it. “Gotcha,” she said. 

“Funny. That’s what I was about to say,” a voice said behind her. 

Felicity whirled around to find the Count standing in the doorway of the van, blocking her exit. He grinned and waved at her. 

_Oh, frack_. 

***

_He knocked me out_. 

It was the first thought that took hold in her mind as she came around. Felicity hadn’t even known she’d been knocked out. The last thing she recalled was seeing the Count in the vaccination van. Now she was…. 

Felicity looked around. This was Oliver’s office at QC and she was sitting in a chair in front of his desk. No, scratch that. She was tied to a chair.How did they get _here_? And how did he knock her out and…

“You have some questions, I can see that,” the Count said in a sing-songy voice. He came into her field of vision, sitting down in Oliver’s chair, propping his feet up on the desk. “I pay attention to the local news. I bet you never would have guessed that. And last week, you and Oliver Queen were _all_ the news for a day or so. Something about an office romance? So exciting! But then you left your job here and went to work at Merlyn Global and everyone sort of forgot it after a day or so. I didn’t, though. That little nugget was lurking in the back of my mind and the minute I saw you snooping around that van, it all came together for me.”

Felicity pulled on her wrists but they were secure. Zip-ties. The hard plastic bit into the soft flesh of her wrists the more she moved so she forced herself to calm. 

The Count sat up, commanding her attention. “I remember Oliver Queen from last year. He tried to buy off me, right before the police busted me. I wondered at the time if he’d had anything to do with my incarceration or that pesky vigilante, the Hood, that liked to ruin all my fun. But then I was… incapacitated for a time, thanks to the Hood.” The Count’s expression grew dark. “That was no picnic, I assure you. But I remembered some more things, some very juicy little tidbits, when I came back to myself later on. I remembered the Hood coming to the psychiatric hospital and learning I was being used as a puppet by that pathetic excuse for a doctor. Let me tell you, someone else getting their nasty mitts all over my precious formula didn’t sit well with me but there wasn’t a lot I could do about it. I was a prisoner in my own body. I could see and hear, but not react. Ha, kind of like you right now, tied to that chair.”

Felicity glared as best she could. The Count seemed amused. “You have spunk, I’ll give you that. Mr. Queen has good taste. Or, should I call him the Arrow?”

“Wha—? How did you—?”

“How did I know?” he asked, leaning forwards, resting his elbows on the desk. “Just like I’ve been telling you. I pay attention. And that night at the hospital, the Hood was unmasked as Oliver Queen. Now, he thought that his secret was safe since I was a vegetable and the evil doctor who stole my formula was dead… but I knew. I remembered. So when the earthquake assisted me in getting free of Iron Heights, I wanted to find Mr. Queen and do to him what he’d done to me. Except he was gone. Vanished. For five months, I couldn’t find him. But a player came to town, it’s not important who and you don’t know him, but this person assured me that Mr. Queen would in fact return. I wondered how he could know this, despite being a man of means as he was, but sure enough, he did return.

“That’s when I noticed _you_. You were always there at his side. Here at Queen Consolidated while he played CEO… and then the rumors started and grew and grew… that news story was quite illuminating. I realized, you aren’t just his employee, are you?You’re more than that. It all came together when I found you in that van. _This_ was how I was going to draw out the Hood, Oliverrrr… the _Arrow_. By dangling you in front of him like a carrot.”

Felicity felt her breath leave her body. “No! You can’t!”

“I absolutely can, and I will.Just watch, this is going to be so fun!”

The Count picked up her cellphone, he must have found it in her purse, and dialed a number. She could only watch helplessly as he waited for the other line to pick up. He sat back in his seat, feet kicked up on the desk, waiting patiently, looking as though he had all the time in the world. 

Then… “Oliver….” A grin stretched across the Count’s face. “Is it okay if I call you Oliver? Surprised to hear from me, right? Not as surprised as I was earlier tonight.” He stood up from the desk and circled around to behind her chair. She felt his fingers trace her ponytail and she fought a shudder, a scared whimper escaping. “You see, I found this very attractive blonde getting all nosey around my business. And I recognized her from a recent newspaper article. Your girlfriend, perhaps? Which is interesting because I remember _you_ very well from last year. So, _Arrow_ , we’re having a little party at Queen Consolidated and I would just _love_ for you to join us. So would she.”

This was _not_ going to go well at all. Felicity squeezed her eyes shut and tried to block out the Count’s touch as he stroked her shoulders and teased her about his plans to kill the Arrow. 

***

Oliver’s heart was pounding as he rode the executive elevator up to the floor where his office was. He was dressed in his leathers, his hood down, face free of greasepaint. There was no sense in hiding his identity since the Count seemed to know all too well who he was. As he shifted his grip on his bow, he thought back to twenty minutes earlier, when he’d answered that call at the courthouse. 

He and Thea were waiting outside of chambers, nervous and distressed. The trial hadn’t gone well for Moira at all. The ADA had trapped Moira on the stand and used the fact that she’d had an affair with Malcolm Merlyn over eighteen years ago to make it seem like she was sympathetic to the madman who had tried to destroy the Glades completely. Even his mother’s lawyer, Jean Loring, thought that the verdict wasn’t going to go well. The judge was pressing for a decision tonight, which was a bad sign. A quick verdict was often a guilty one. And since the DA’s office was going to fight for the death penalty, this ruling could mean the end of his mother’s life. 

To say that Oliver was already stressed out would be putting it very _mildly_. 

But then, getting that call… He’d thought it was Felicity, perhaps filling him in on something she’d learned about the Count and how he was distributing the Vertigo. Just seeing her face, in the contact picture on his phone, had felt good and he’d looked forward to hearing her voice, having her ground him amidst the emotional chaos that was this trial. Instead, it'd been the Count's slimy voice greeting him over the line; taunting Oliver with knowledge of his vigilante persona and… the fact that he had Felicity hostage. 

There was simply no way Oliver could ignore that. He knew it was a trap, he knew the Count wanted him there so he could kill him and get his revenge, but this was _Felicity_. Even the thought of her being held there now, scared and alone and having to deal with whatever the Count might be doing to her, was making his blood boil with rage and fear and desperation. 

It was the fury that was in the driver’s seat now, propelling his steps off the elevator and towards his office. He approached quietly and carefully and saw that the Count had Felicity zip-tied to a chair in the conference room. He stood behind her, idly running his fingers through her long ponytail, the hair swishing. Oliver grit his jaw and glared at the Count, who just smiled benignly back at him. 

“Pretty swanky offices,” he said, gesturing at the space around them. “You can see all the destruction that your mom caused from up here. Tell me, did the jury convict her yet?”

Oliver stood in the doorway, trying not to focus on Felicity who he could tell was scared to death. He could almost _feel_ her trembling from where he stood. Instead, he focused on the Count, the threat that he needed to neutralize. “What do you want?” he growled. 

“World peace and personal satisfaction,” the Count purred back. He stroked at Felicity’s shoulder suggestively, causing her to shudder and Oliver gripped his bow even tighter. “Though not necessarily in that order.”

Oliver made a move to step towards him but the Count moved quicker, coming around from behind Felicity’s chair, his eyes now sparking with rage. “You poisoned me and put me in a hole. You have _no_ idea how much I hated you for that.” Then, he smiled and straightened, his demeanor changing completely once again. “Turns out, someone else hates you even more.”

That didn’t sound good. “Who?”

He chuckled, a hard, evil sound that echoed around the empty rooms. “Oh, you’re going to be so surprised when you find out. You will never guess, I promise you that. He’s a man of means, set me up with my new operation. It was all to draw you out.”

“To do what?”

“This!”

Oliver spotted the Count’s move an instant before he made and he dove behind the sofa in his office to escape the rain of bullets from the pistol he’d pulled from behind him on the desk. As he landed, he felt a burning sting in his arm, near his bicep. 

“You’re going to have to try harder!” he couldn’t resist calling out. 

“Done!”

The next rain of bullets came a little too close to his head. 

In the conference room, he heard Felicity cry out sharply and he imagined that the Count was moving her, roughly. He clenched his jaw, his teeth grinding. “Come on,” he heard the Count say to her, his voice a growl, pushing her in front of him like a human shield. 

Oliver had to move.

Using his stealth, he slipped out from his spot behind the couch and hurried on silent feet towards the other entrance to the conference room. It wasn’t used very much, but was handy in situations such as this. Though he doubted the architect had shootouts in mind when planning it. He was able to slip in behind the Count, however, and surprise him when he learned that Oliver wasn’t still behind the sofas. 

“Ahhh,” the Count hissed, when Oliver stepped out, pulling back an arrow and aiming at the scumbag’s head. “So now we move on to plan B.”

He pulled a double syringe from his pocket and brought it up to Felicity’s neck. Oliver tensed as Felicity cried out. 

“Oliver! Don’t! Not for me!”

“Quiet, please,” the Count told her, “I’m threatening.”

Felicity was visibly shaking. Her arms, where she was reaching back towards her ponytail that the Count was still yanking on. Her legs, teetering on those stiletto heels she always wore these days. Tears were running down her cheeks, smearing her makeup. Oliver had never been so scared in his entire life as he was right that second. One move and the Count could end her life. He’d seen what a single dose that size could do to a fully grown man when he showed up at the Count’s warehouse last night. It would kill her, probably very painfully. 

“Lower your bow,” the Count instructed, fixing him with a hard look. 

After a moment, and with every fiber in his body protesting, he lowered the bow and threw the nocked arrow to the side. It clattered noisily on the marble floor. “Your problem is with me, not her. Let her go.”

“Mmm, I don’t think so. I think she’s important to you and as long as I have her, I can control _you_.”

“You’re right. You have me. So let her go and you can do whatever you want.”

“Oliver, no!”

“Interesting. But not as interesting as watching you suffer,” the Count said, his eyes glittering in the low light. “Consider this your penalty for making me to go to plan B in the first place.”

Everything slowed down as Oliver saw the Count swing his arm, the hand holding the double syringe, towards Felicity. He raised his bow and grabbed his arrows in an instant, firing before he could even think about anything beyond stopping him before those needles reached her neck. 

One… an arrow sunk into the Count’s chest, center mass. It knocked him back and caused him to release his hold on Felicity. She crumpled to the floor like she was made of rags. 

Two… another arrow pierced him, right next to the first, driving him backwards and away from where Felicity lay curled on the floor. He stumbled towards the large plate glass window, the same one he and Felicity had crashed out of only weeks earlier. 

Three… a final arrow embedded in the Count’s chest, thrusting him back against the glass that was already cracked with one of the stray bullets from before. The force of his body caused the glass to shatter and the Count fell backwards out the window, and down 17 stories to the street below. 

Silence. 

Oliver felt his senses start to widen again, he could feel his own heart thundering, his breathing harsh in his own ears, Felicity’s soft whimpers from the floor, the sounds of honking and a car alarm blaring down on the street below. He’d done it. He’d killed the Count. He’d broken his vow to Laurel and to himself to never kill again. And he would do it again in a heartbeat if it meant saving _her_. 

He felt _relieved_. 

Oliver gave himself a moment, he closed his eyes and took a deep breath, letting the adrenaline go. And then he opened his eyes and looked for her. 

Felicity was on the floor still, bent and shaking. He went to her instantly, kneeling before her, his heart twisting at her obvious distress. 

“Hey, hey,” he said softly. “Shh, it’s alright.You’re safe.” 

He reached out to cup her cheek, tilting her chin up so he could look in her eyes and make sure, for himself, that she was okay. Her eyes were filled with tears as they met his briefly before sliding over to the arm that was holding his bow. 

“Oh! You were shot,” she said, lifting a hand and letting it hover over where the leather of his jacket was torn. He glanced down and saw she was right. He hadn’t even realized. It looked like a graze, just enough to break the skin. 

“It’s nothing,” he assured her, his voice still soft. Because it wasn’t anything. She was safe. That was all that mattered. 

“Are you sure?” she asked, sniffling. “I need to bandage that up and—“ 

Oliver stood up and took her hands, pulling her to her feet. Felicity wobbled on her heels and he steadied her with a hand on her waist and on her shoulder. She leaned into him, her eyes huge behind her glasses. Her hair was all askew, coming out of her ponytail and her nose was red from her tears. Oliver thought she’d never looked more beautiful. 

“Later,” he promised. He could hear sirens wailing in the distance, drawing nearer. 

“You better go… before they get here.”

He just nodded, not letting her go and not looking away. 

“Oliver?”

He couldn’t help himself. He simply couldn’t. So he tugged her closer to him, until he felt the warmth of her up against him. Then, he dipped his head and pressed his lips to hers. 

Just like every other time he’s kissed her, she filled his senses and it felt like everything inside him slipped neatly into place. But at the same time, everything exploded into vivid color and all he knew was _her_. She surrounded him, filled him, completed him and the way she sighed into his mouth, sinking into his embrace, wrapping her arms around his neck… it was everything. He wanted to spend the rest of forever kissing this woman and he knew that now, without a doubt. 

The loud blare of sirens and a fire engine honking on the street below cut through the fog of love and need to feel her safe in his arms that was overwhelming him. He pulled way and pressed his forehead to hers. 

“I have to go,” he said, his voice filled with regret. 

“Go,” she said. 

Oliver wanted to tell her that he’d come find her later and they would talk and he would finally tell her things he needed to tell her because tonight had shown him how quickly he could lose her and he didn’t want to waste another moment just waiting for that perfect time. But they both heard the sound of the elevator which meant… he really had to go. So he used his last moment to brush his lips against hers once last time and then he vanished. 

***

Felicity went to the foundry after leaving Queen Consolidated. First, she’d had to give a statement to the cops and let the EMTs check her out. Save for a few small bruises, she was physically fine. She had to call a cab to take her to clinic office where she’d left her Mini. She’d been in a stupor as she drove towards Verdant. She needed to check on Dig. 

He was sitting up when she arrived. “Felicity! There you are. I’ve been out of my mind. Are you okay?”

“I’m fine, Dig,” she assured him with a small smile. 

“Oliver came tearing in here like the devil was after him, barely grunted two words to me while he suited up and grabbed his gear. By the time he came back, the news was reporting a hostage incident at Queen Consolidated. I still didn’t get much explanation, he said he had to get back to the courthouse. What the hell happened?”

“What did the news say?”

“That an unidentified woman was taken hostage by the Count and it resulted in a standoff with the Arrow, leaving the Count dead. And that the police now had access to an antidote to the Vertigo.”

Felicity held up the syringe she’d taken from the van when she went back for her Mini. Of course, she’d let the police know what needed to be done with the Vertigo, and where to find it, in order to ease the suffering in those citizens who were afflicted. But she’d wanted Dig to have earliest access possible to the antidote rather than having to wait for the labs the police used to create it so she’d also grabbed a sample. 

“And so do we,” she said, hoping that distracted Dig from asking her any more questions. He deserved to know, she just wasn’t sure she was ready to talk about it just yet.

“I see what you’re doing,” Dig told her, fixing her with a look. _Frack_. “Just tell me this… did he hurt you?”

Felicity shook her head, biting her lip. “No. Oliver saved me.”

Dig nodded. “Good. For what it’s worth, I would have done what Oliver did. In a heartbeat.”

That made her smile a little. It felt so good knowing these men had her back every bit as much as she had theirs, regardless of whatever might be going on between her and Oliver. Or wasn’t going on. _No thinking about that kiss, Smoak._

“I’m so glad I used some of the money Oliver left us to buy this lab equipment,” she told Dig as she formulated the antidote. “I knew it’d come in handy sometime.”

Chemistry had never been her best subject, but she knew enough and where her knowledge failed, the research she brought up on her tablet filled the gaps. 

“I sure hope this works,” Dig said as he watched her work, still shivering a little. “Lyla is out of her mind with worry but ARGUS has been keeping her out of town and busy.”

“Have you talked to her?”

“Called her cell earlier today. It’s a good thing she’s been out of town, I guess, otherwise she’d be down here pestering all of us. She hovers when she worries. That or she shoots people.”

Felicity grinned. “I think I’m going to really like Lyla.”

“I’ve told her all about you guys, she can’t wait to get to know you better,” Dig said. 

“Uh oh, I hope they were all good things,” she teased.

“I might have shared with her how you and Oliver’s sexual tension is slowly killing me.”

“You didn’t!”

“I sure did. I need someone on my side in this. By the way, she totally is.”

“And what side is that?” Felicity filled a syringe with the antidote carefully, checking the tube for any bubbles. 

“The side that says you two need to get your shit sorted and get together already.”

Felicity felt her cheeks heat as she blushed. “Dig…”

“You know I try not to meddle with you two too much,” he told her, gentling his tone. “I know this is something you both need to figure out in your own time. But for what it’s worth, I’m rooting for _both_ of you.”

Felicity pushed up Dig’s sleeve and injected him quickly. “Sorry for the poke. And I appreciate it, Dig. I’m just not sure if anything can or will happen anytime soon.”

“I think you’re wrong there. I’ve got a good sense for these things.”

“Well… keep thinking the good thoughts. It can’t hurt, right?”

“Sure. And if that fails, Lyla suggested I lock the two of you in a closet together.”

Felicity looked sharply at him and he burst out laughing. She joined in, a little nervously, not sure if he was serious or not. 

Dig wanted to leave as soon as it was clear the antidote was working. She offered him a ride, but he assured her he was fine. He was already feeling much better. So she took off on her own, getting into her Mini and heading towards her neighborhood. 

Felicity let herself into her apartment over two hours later.Apparently, she’d been running on pure adrenaline, because once she shut her door and locked it, she felt the events of the evening finally catchup to her. 

She could still feel the Count’s creepy hands on her… in her hair… skating along her arm… squeezing her shoulders… Her stomach rolled. She needed a shower. Before she did anything else, she needed to wash that man’s touch off of her body. 

She started stripping just inside the door, peeling off her shoes and her jacket and her dress and her bra and her underwear. She tossed her glasses onto her nightstand before padding into the bathroom, tearing out the hair tie that was barely holding her hair back in a ponytail at this point and throwing that on the counter. Then, she turned on the shower as hot as she could tolerate it. 

Felicity stood under the spray and let it rain over her, the sharp hot stinging drops sanitizing her body. She kept her eyes closed and let the water wash over her face, taking the smudged remains of her makeup with it to swirl around the drain at her feet. She could feel herself shaking, despite the steam rising around her. And as soon as she acknowledged the fact that she was shaking, she felt the tears start to crowd in her throat. 

Her sob echoed off the walls of her bathroom, sounding louder and more real and startling her but it also made her cry harder. She wasn’t even sure why she was crying. She felt utterly overwhelmed by all of it… being taken, tied up, taunted… watching Oliver arrive and seeing the utterly _wrecked_ look on his face as he watched the Count threaten her. Then… Oliver killed. He killed the Count, just to save her. 

Ever since he returned to Starling, the one thing he’d been most adamant about was that he was done killing. Felicity knew how important that vow was to him. He made that vow to honor Laurel and her memory and what she would have wanted. And because she had not listened to Oliver’s request that she wait for him before making any moves, he’d had to break that vow. The guilt she felt was all-encompassing. 

Then there was that kiss. He’d kissed her. It had been a lovely, comforting, soft, gentle and emotional kiss and it made her heart pound even now just remembering it. He’d initiated it, had seemed reluctant to end it and had looked like he wanted to say something before he realized he had to leave or else risk getting caught by the police. It was easily the most romantic thing that had ever happened to her in her entire life and, yes, she was counting all her previous intimate interactions with Oliver over the last six or so months. 

What did it mean, though? Was he back to jerking her around? She’d told him that day at QC that she’d talk when he was ready to talk but that she didn’t want him to play around with her. So what was that kiss? Maybe it was just comfort, she told herself. That was the only thing that made any sense at all. 

She tried to pull herself from these morose thoughts by grabbing her body wash and washcloth and scrubbing every inch of her that she could reach. Her shoulders, especially, but her chest, her belly, her legs, her arms, her neck… Her skin was raw and pink by the time she was done but she felt much better. Then, she washed her hair. She shampooed three times before smoothing on her conditioner. 

By the time the water started turning cool, Felicity felt much, much better. She toweled off and then wrapped the towel around her midsection while she brushed her hair free of tangles. She was just smoothing lotion onto her legs when she heard a noise. Straightening up, she turned off the fan in the bathroom so she could hear better. 

It was a pounding noise.It took her a moment to realize it was coming from her front door. Felicity’s heart leapt nervously before she realized who it must be. _Oliver_. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter goes up on Monday!


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oliver wants to make sure Felicity is okay in the wake of the Count's attack. Having come so close to losing her, Oliver realizes it's finally time to talk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we are, folks. The last chapter. I want to thank everyone who read along as I updated, left me comments, dropped kudos, reblogged on tumblr, liked my posts, retweeted and generally shared your enthusiasm with me. You guys are the real heroes in this story. You are the ones who make posting new chapters worth the time and effort and without you, I'd probably just sit on my stories and never share them. But you give me a reason to put this story and others out there so THANK YOU. I appreciate you more than you'll ever know. 
> 
> HUGE thanks for fistis for the art and to the-silverforked-sky for being my tireless beta. 
> 
> Big thanks also go to Rach over at olicityficbang.tumblr.com for organizing this wonderful event and keeping everyone going. It's hard work but all the fic that has flooded the fandom has been so worth it. 
> 
> Without further ado... the conclusion to "ready for the fall". If you're interested, have a listen to the song that inspired the title: <https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iEfPffexVLo>

Oliver stood at Felicity’s door, his hands in his pockets, shifting from foot to foot. He wasn’t sure if coming here was the right thing. He just knew that after his mother’s trial finished and she was miraculously, inexplicably found not guilty, the only place he wanted to be was right here. The only person he wanted to see was Felicity. He’d made his excuses to Thea and his mother, his sister understanding from the look in his eye where he was headed. “Go get her, tiger,” she’d told him with a wink, drawing a confused look from his mother. 

Even now, Oliver grinned, thinking about what formally introducing Felicity, this time as more than his friend and in passing, to his mother was going to be like. That is… if this went well. And he hoped it did. His mother would still meet and get to know Felicity regardless; she was an important person in his life, romantically or not. 

He knocked on Felicity’s door again, getting a little concerned that she hadn’t answered yet. What if there was something wrong with her, what if the Count had hurt her and Oliver didn’t know about it and she was in her apartment, all alone… As his mind raced through possibilities, each one more terrible than the last, the door finally opened. 

Felicity stood on the other side, wearing a surprised expression and… a towel. 

Her hair was wet, hanging around her shoulders in damp tendrils, drops of water still trailing down over her shoulders and into the edge of the towel, where it was secured just over her breasts in a knot. Her skin was dewy and pink, her face clear of makeup and her eyes, free of her glasses, were red, telling him she’d been crying. Immediately, his mind was pulled from the gutter and he stepped forward, barely catching himself before he pulled her into his arms.

“Oliver!”

“Felicity… are you okay? You look…” he said, trailing off weakly.

She ducked her head and stepped back, gesturing for him to step inside. She closed and locked the door behind him. She looked so small and young and vulnerable, standing there as she was, her hair just starting to curl as it dried. 

“I’m… better,” she admitted. “I was pretty out of it when I made it home.” 

Oliver looked around her apartment and noticed the trail of shoes and clothes that lead back towards her bedroom. It told him quite a bit about the state she’d been in when she arrived home, since Felicity only got sloppy like that when she was feeling distraught.He knew that from experience. 

This time he couldn’t stop himself. He stepped towards her, carefully watching her for any sign that his advance would be more than she could take at the moment. She had, after all, been fairly traumatized just hours ago. His heart lurched and he reached for her, smoothing his palms over her shoulders and feeling how soft her skin felt. 

She shuddered a bit, but notched her chin up to meet his gaze, but her gaze was distant. 

“Felicity… I’m so sorry.”

That seemed to shake her, bring her back to the moment. “Oh, Oliver. I’m the one who’s sorry.”

He led her over to the sofa and they sat. She twisted her hands in her lap, seeming not to mind that she was just in a towel. 

“Why are you sorry?” he asked, unable to think of a single reason why she should feel that way. 

“I— I didn’t listen. You told me to wait for you and I didn’t. I just wanted that antidote for Dig as soon as possible and it seemed like such an easy thing to do to go find the vans, look for the syringes.”

“Felicity…”

“You made a vow to Laurel and to yourself not to kill anymore. It was my fault… I got myself into trouble and you… killed him.”

Her eyes were filled with tears and Oliver could feel a lump forming in his throat, witnessing her guilt. 

“You killed again and I’m sorry that I was the one to put you in a position where you had to make that choice.” Her chin trembled but she kept her eyes on his. 

Oliver reached out and took her hand in his, clasping it firmly. “Felicity… He had you and he was going to hurt you. There was no choice to make.”

A tear slipped down her cheek and he reached up to catch it with the hand that wasn’t holding hers. He brushed it away using the pad of his thumb, trying to keep his touch gentle on her soft, smooth skin. 

“Oliver… I—“

He leaned forward and kissed her. He literally didn’t know what else to do. He sunk his fingers into her damp hair and pulled her to him, devouring the rest of what she was about to say. She kissed him back, opening to him and sliding her hands up to cup the back of his head as he slanted his head and kissed her deeper. He hadn’t been able to get that kiss at QC earlier out of his head, not the whole time he was at the courthouse waiting for the verdict to be read or even afterwards, in the flurry of confused congratulations. 

He’d been so scared, watching the Count threaten her. His rage had encompassed him, his need to protect her overriding everything else. He hadn’t kissed her there because he wanted to, he’d kissed her because he _needed_ to. But this kiss was all about want. He wanted to kiss her now and every day from now. If she’d let him. 

He felt her pull away and he released her, letting her go. She had that crinkle between her brows that she got when she was feeling conflicted. He resisted the urge to smooth it away with his fingers as he sat back on the sofa. 

“Felicity?”

“I’m sorry, Oliver. I—I just can’t keep doing this with you. Where we fall together and then the next day there’s some reason why we can’t be together. I told you this, I explained to you that I can’t keep doing this.” Her blue-grey eyes were big and red-rimmed, filled with tears. 

“I know, Felicity. I remember.” 

“But even more than that,” she went on, before he could continue, “I can’t do casual with _you_.”

That made him stop, freeze, his mind emptying and then filling all at once with images of them having a life together. It almost scared him how badly he wanted it. “Why me?”

Her cheeks colored and she picked at the edge of her towel, where it stretched across her thighs. “You’re different, Oliver. You always have been. I don’t think we ever had a real shot at being _just_ friends because… well you know I had that crush on you all that time last year.”

Oliver couldn’t help but smile. “I kinda got that impression, yeah.”

“What gave it away?” she asked, wryly.

“All the times you stared at me as I did the salmon ladder? Or how you’d blush and make all these innuendos around me, especially at first…” He remembered all of that so fondly. At the time, he’d thought her staring was a good boost to his ego and the innuendos were adorable but now… those moments meant even more somehow. Like they were stepping stones. 

Felicity blushed harder and waved a hand as if shooing a fly. “Anyhow. I can’t do casual with you because you’re too important to me. And _I’m_ too important to me. I thought maybe I could just put my feelings aside but I can’t… and each day that passes by, I’m falling in deeper and deeper and it’s hurting, Oliver, it really hurts…”

Tears started to fall and Oliver felt a stab of regret over how he’d handled things with her, starting last May in that cabin. “Shhh, Felicity… Please, don’t cry.”

“I’m sorry, I can’t help it. It’s just—“

“I don’t want you to cry because if you start crying, then I have to cry too.”

She blinked at looked at him, that line between her eyebrows reappearing. “What? Why?”

“Because I can’t do casual with you either.”

It felt like all the air had suddenly been sucked out of the room. Felicity stared at him, her eyes wide, her mouth falling open as she studied him silently. 

“Felicity?”

She shook herself, blinking a few times and shifting on the sofa. “I’m sorry, it’s just… After Russia, you said that you couldn’t be with me and be the Arrow, and that because of this life, it was better not to go down this path together.”

Oliver blew out a breath. “I know, and I was an asshole for saying that. I thought I was doing the right thing, I thought that…” He paused, the realization washing over him fully now. “I thought I didn’t deserve anything more.”

Felicity’s expression softened and she reached up to rest her palm against his cheek, cupping his face in such a sweet, caring gesture that he felt tears prick at his eyes. “Oh, Oliver.”

“I was stupid,” he pressed on, needing her to know. “I was scared and so I did something stupid.”

“We’ve all been there. I promise,” she told him. 

“And I can’t even begin to tell you how sorry I am about that news leak and having to leave QC and Tommy… he always wanted you to have that job, I really hope you know that. You earned that job all on your own—“

She shifted her hand on his face and pressed her thumb over his lips, silencing him. “Shh. I know that. I had a long talk with Tommy about it.”

“Still, I should have done a better job explaining to you what I was trying to do and why.”

Felicity chewed on her lip as she considered him. “Why _did_ you do that? You could have just told the board that we weren’t in a relationship, we weren’t going to be in one, and acted like it was all just a fabrication.”

He took a breath.Here went nothing. “I didn’t want to lie. Not to the PR team, not to the board, not to the people of this city and, most importantly, not to you. I couldn’t tell them something that I felt was a lie. You see, I want to have a relationship with you. I want to be able to date you and let the world know.”

Felicity blinked at him, her eyes wide. She removed her hand, letting it fall to her lap. “You want… to date me?”

He smiled. “I’d like to, yes. And I thought, maybe, it might be easier for us to date and you not work for me while we did. There’s no rules against it in the QC company handbook, but I know you’ve had to endure a lot of nasty gossip since I made you my EA. You shrugged it off because you’re amazing and wonderful, but I know it had to bother you. It bothered _me_.” Oliver shrugged a shoulder. “I thought this was a good solution, to avoid the gossip and to allow you to be in the type of position you deserve to be in. You should never be anyone’s assistant, Felicity. I made a mistake, albeit for reasons I felt were justified at the time, when I put you in that position.”

Felicity looked overwhelmed. “Oliver… wow. I just… I had no idea!”

“I know. And I wanted to take this slower with you. Let you get accustomed to the new job at Merlyn Global, make sure that our working relationship was solid for the team and perhaps try to win you over. I had plans, Felicity. I wanted to take my time and really show you that I am serious about how I feel, serious about you.”

She said nothing, utterly speechless. He decided to take that as a good sign. 

“I wanted to prove myself to you, Felicity, because I’m in love with you. Somewhere between a bullet-ridden laptop and that cabin in the mountains, I fell in love with you. I think it happened slowly, bit by bit and day by day. Because once I realized how I felt, I also realized that it wasn’t _new_. This has been building for a long time now and I’m done trying to run from it.”

Once again, tears sparkled in her eyes but she was smiling. Genuinely _smiling_.Without a word, she reached for him and tugged him down towards her. Oliver went gladly, capturing her lips with his. Her let her steer the kiss and it became clear when she pushed herself closer to him that she was interested in going someplace very heated. He kissed her back, caressing her lips with his tongue and delighting when she opened for him so he could taste her more fully. 

He remembered, then, that she was only wearing a towel and as much as his blood roared south at the thought, he needed to rein this in.Oliver pulled back reluctantly, pressing kiss after kiss to her lips, not wanting to leave this embrace. She was breathing hard, her breath puffing on his chin and he rested his forehead against hers, closing his eyes against his almost overwhelming urge to yank that towel off of her and take her here on this sofa. 

“Felicity,” he panted. “I don’t— If you want to wait, or—or take it slow…”

She huffed, half amusement and half impatient. “Wait? Oliver, I’m pretty sure if you don’t take me to bed right now, I’m going to kick you out of my apartment.”

Oliver felt his jaw drop open. This woman would never stop surprising him, would she? He was just about to reach for her again when she held a hand up. 

“Unless _you_ want to wait… in which case I can totally be patient. Maybe.” She was turning red now and Oliver felt his heart twist at just how _precious_ he found her. 

“I’m very much interested in making love to you. Right now,” he assured her, his voice low. 

Her cheeks turned pinker but her eyes darkened. Her lips were flushed and parted and she was watching his lips. Oliver didn’t need any more encouragement. He pulled her to him and she went willingly, climbing into his lap and swinging a leg over his so she straddled him. She was bare underneath the towel and he dared not look down to where the towel was riding up on her legs or else he’d be having her right here on this sofa instead of bringing her to her bed where he could take his time and do everything that his brain was helpfully shouting at him to do. 

If he just sat here, letting her circle her hips on his lap as she kissed him deeply, her fingers in his cropped hair, he was going to forget about everything he wanted to do. So while he still had blood left in his brain, he stood from the sofa, bringing her with him, He gripped her thighs as he banded an arm around her back to keep her pressed against him. Felicity got the hint fairly quickly and held him around his shoulders while she wrapped her legs around his waist. 

Oliver hadn’t spent a lot of time at Felicity’s apartment so he wasn’t 100% sure where anything was. He’d mostly ever lurked around the front door, nervous to go any further. Tonight, he wanted to go all the way. He ripped his lips from hers for one breathless moment. 

“Bedroom?”

“Behind you,” Felicity gasped, waving one of her arms behind him. “It’s the door on the right.”

He returned to kissing her, tangling his tongue with hers, cupping the back of her head with one hand while the other remained around her torso securely and he moved them in the direction she’d gestured. Luckily, no furniture was in the way or he would have easily knocked it over. Nothing was stopping him right now. 

He did knock into the wall with his shoulder as he made his way back into the hall that lead to Felicity’s room. He grunted into her mouth and felt her lips pull into a smile against his. But then she was kissing him again, her lips soft and wet and moving down across his jaw, her teeth nibbling at his ear and he groaned. He stopped walking for a minute, pressing her against the wall there so he could push his hips into hers and relieve some of the aching pressure that had built up in his jeans. 

He could feel, through the denim of his jeans, where she was hot and already wet. For him; she was wet for _him_. His kisses had done that and he’d barely even touched her yet. Knowing she was so turned on by him only ratcheted his desire up even higher. 

Quickly, he moved them into her room, making a beeline for her bed. Oliver didn’t even pause to appreciate his surroundings; his mind was now completely occupied by the woman in his arms, the one who was sucking kisses into his neck. 

His body was screaming at him to do something aggressive… find her desk or her dresser and sit her down on it… or better yet, bend her over it and fuck her from behind. Or up against the wall. Or even just to throw her down on the bed and watch her bounce, the towel falling free. But he didn’t do any of those things. Through some incredible force of will, he held himself back. Instead, he laid her down on the bed carefully, her head on the pillow and her damp hair spilling across the pillow case. He bent over her, kissing her deeply while he braced his arm next to her head. 

She met each thrust of his tongue with one of her own. Oliver was quickly getting drunk on her taste, on her smell… and it made him want so much more. Images flashed through his mind of exactly what he wanted to do with her, fueling him to leave her lips and start slowly moving down over her body. He _forced_ himself to go slow, nuzzling, kissing, nibbling along each patch of skin he encountered.

When he reached the edge of the towel, where the ends were tucked between her breasts, he lifted his head to look up at her. She was watching him, propped up against the pillows. Her lower lip was caught between her teeth, her eyes dark and glittering. She nodded. 

He ran his fingertips along the fabric, brushing her skin lightly. Slowly, he hooked his fingers underneath the towel and pulled it loose. Inch by inch, Oliver parted the towel, his lips gliding over her skin as it was revealed to him. Her chest moved with her heavy breaths as he nuzzled around the curve of her breasts, kissing at the swells one at a time. 

Her skin was so soft, so smooth; he couldn’t resist giving a little nibble on the underside of one breast, making her hips jump up. Oliver smiled at her reaction, enjoying how sensitive she was. It told him he was doing this absolutely right, working her up and slowly stoking the fire within her. He kissed towards her nipple, taking just a moment to appreciate how it pebbled into a tight point before he drew it into his mouth. He caressed the flesh with his tongue as he sucked softly, engulfing more of her breast and coaxing a long, low moan from her throat. He glanced up and saw her head thrown back, her back arched towards his mouth, her mouth open. 

God, that was so fucking hot. Oliver released her nipple and stifled a groan as he continued moving down her body. He enjoyed her shiver as he kissed along her abdomen, swirling his tongue around the edge of her belly button. He detoured, moving over to her hip and nipping at the jutting hipbone there. Her gasp was music to his ears and her hips shifted again restlessly. He could smell her now, her arousal, and it reminded him of what his goal was. 

Even then, he took his time kissing down from her hipbone, down over her pubic bone and to the top of her thigh. Oliver shifted back on the mattress and nudged her thighs apart with his hands. He took one of her legs and pulled it over his shoulder, opening her up to him. 

He hadn’t gotten a chance to do this yet, though doing this had featured heavily in his dreams for months now. In May, there just wasn’t a chance. And in Russia, they were in a hurry. Now? He could take his time and finally fulfill this fantasy for himself the way he wanted to. 

He began by pressing soft kisses to the insides of her thighs, enjoying how they trembled under his lips. Once she started making breathless noises, he moved closer to her apex, towards where he could see her already dripping wet in anticipation. The sight made him lick his lips. He dipped his head and teased her folds with the tip of his tongue. The sensation made her cry out and try to lift her hips. He reached up and braced one arm over her hips to keep her in place, with the other hand, he parted her folds gently. Then, he blew on her entrance, smiling at how that small sensation made her muscles clench. 

He hovered for a moment, until he heard her make a keening noise. Only then did he decide to put her out of her anticipation. He licked from her entrance up to her clit, circling around before swooping back to her entrance and thrusting his tongue inside of her as far as he could. The noises Felicity was making were amazing and spurred him on. Her cries grew breathier and more insistent and he knew what she really wanted. 

Oliver dragged his tongue up to her clit, circling it slowly and then quicker until her shouts echoed off the walls of her room. Only then did he start flicking her clit directly. Her thighs clenched and he could feel the leg he had over his shoulder tighten as her heel dug into his back. He kept at it, even as he could feel her whole body tightening, even when he knew she was just about to crash into her orgasm. When she shouted his name, he latched onto her clit, pulling the hard little nub into his mouth and sucking. 

With a wail, Felicity came and she came _hard._ He licked her through it, lapping up her release and gentling his ministrations until she was squirming to get away from his touch. Only then did he move back, replacing her leg back onto the bed and crawling up to lay on the pillow next to her. 

Felicity was panting hard, an arm flung over her eyes. Sweat stood out on her chest and forehead and Oliver felt pleased with himself even as his erection throbbed, wanting attention. He stroked a hand along her skin, enjoying the dips and curves, waiting for her to catch her breath. 

“You’re going to be the death of me,” she told him, still panting. 

“I can’t have that,” he murmured, pressing a kiss to her damp shoulder. “I have plans for you.”

“Oh?” She removed her arm and turned her head towards him, her eyes twinkling. “What sort of plans?”

“Well… some of them are a surprise. I can’t tell you or it’ll ruin it,” he explained. 

“I hate mysteries.”

“I know.” He leaned up and kissed her lips, enjoying the way her own lips cradled his lower lip. He moved against her, his stiff cock brushing against her hip and making him gasp at the sensation. 

Felicity pulled away from him and pushed on his shoulder, urging him to roll onto his back. He obliged her, keeping his eyes on her to watch what she would do. She didn’t disappoint as she immediately swung a leg over his hips. Then, she dragged her fingers down his torso, her nails scraping lightly over his nipples and making him gasp. He lifted his hips and felt where she was so wet from his attentions and her brush against his lower abdomen. He found that unspeakably hot. 

She teased him like he had teased her. Oliver just laid back and enjoyed the view. A naked Felicity hovering over him was a sight to behold and he wanted to burn it into his memory. Then, she bent down and her hair, which was drying into tousled waves, fell in a curtain around her face, hiding her from his view. He could feel her lips moving along his body, tracing his muscles, tattoos and scars and he had to bite his lip. Her touch was loving and caring in a way that he hadn’t experienced with his scars before, or that he’d ever even let anyone else be with him. The way she was exploring him made him feel like those scars were as much a part of him as the rest of his body and he felt a certain peace from that. When she mimicked the bite on his hipbone that he’d given her, however, he gasped out loud. He heard her chuckle as she moved down to where his dick was hard and jutting towards her. 

Oliver’s eyes rolled back into his head as she licked up his straining length, tracing the veins with her tongue before swirling around the head. The tip of her tongue traced the seam, collecting the moisture that had gathered there and she made a pleased, contented sound. A moment later, he felt her mouth engulf the head of his cock and he couldn’t help but shout, even as he strained to keep his hips still on the mattress. 

They hadn’t had a chance to do _this_ either and Oliver was quickly realizing that was probably a good thing because if he’d had a memory like this in the last six or so months but no way to experience it again, he might have gone mad. She was way, way too good at this. 

Soon, he was moaning and shifting his hips, unable to keep completely still, as she worked her magic with her hands and lips and tongue. He felt her fingers massage his balls as she took more of his cock into her mouth. Her tongue pressed to the sensitive vein as she moved her head and her other hand squeezed the base of his dick. After a moment, she lifted off of him and pushed her hair back so she could look in his eyes. 

“You can let go, you know,” she told him. His eyes were glued to her swollen, puffy lips and the flush on her cheeks. “You can move a little, hold my hair, whatever you want.”

Oliver raised an eyebrow and she returned to his cock, blowing across the tip before engulfing him yet again. This time, he let his hips lift and, holy _fuck_ , she hummed around his length as she took him deeper. He reached down, pulling her hair back into a ponytail so he could watch his cock moving between her lips. His dick glistened with her saliva as she worked him and pretty soon, Oliver could feel his spine tingling, his abdomen tightening. 

“Felicity!” he gasped. “Please… stop.”

She let him go at once, but kept her one hand tightly around the base of his dick. “What is it, Oliver?”

“I need…” He had to swallow and try again. “I need to come inside you. Please.”

Her eyes widened but she nodded, finally letting him go altogether. He gripped her arms, helping to pull her up his body. She remained straddling him and when her center brushed over his throbbing cock, she stilled and he moved his hands around to cup her hips. She braced herself over him and lifted up. He took hold of his cock and guided it through her folds. She was still wet, soaking wet, and feeling that wet warmth on his cock just after he’d been in her mouth felt positively sinful. He groaned as he finally found her entrance. Felicity immediately started to press down, taking him in, inch by inch. 

Her walls gripped him, squeezed him and in case he’d forgotten (which he hadn’t), he was reminded that being inside of Felicity was the best feeling in the world. She rocked on him, once she was fully seated on him and the gentle gyrations nearly made him see stars. He gripped her hips again, helping her lift off him before she slammed back down, making both of them cry out. After a few more plunges, he let go of her hips and just watched her bounce on his dick. Her breasts were bouncing too, drawing his eye and he lifted his hands to cup them and feel the weight of them in his palms as she moved. 

“Fuck…” he groaned. 

Felicity started moving faster, her moans growing louder and he realized she was getting close again. He could feel her walls fluttering around his length and he released one of her breasts to reach down to where he was entering her. He ran a finger around her entrance, feeling his cock sliding in and out of her, before focusing that finger on her clit. 

He flicked in time with her movements, circling and pressing and pinching until her cries grew sharper and she knew she was close. 

“C’mon, baby, let go,” he urged her, his voice hoarse. He pressed harder and faster as her own movements became erratic. 

With a loud cry and clamping down on his dick, she came. She shook over him and he rubbed her arms, pumping his own hips to fuck her through her release. While she was still pulsing around him, he wrapped an arm securely around her back and flipped them over so that he was now over her, his rock-hard length still buried inside of her. 

She looked up at him, her eyes big, her cheeks and chest flushed, her lips parted. He held her gaze as he pumped in and out of her, chasing his own release. Her thighs cradled him as she wrapped her legs around his waist and Oliver let himself go, thrusting into her as hard and fast as his body was screaming at him to do. His whole world narrowed to just her, just this woman and the feel of her body squeezing his, her hands on his shoulders, holding him close, her eyes locked with his as he fell apart in her arms. 

The tingling in his spine finally exploded and he yelled her name as he thrust three more times inside of her before filling her with his release. His dick twitched as he came and came and came… pulsing as his orgasm was wrung from him and all the while, Felicity clung to him and whispered his name, pressing kisses to his face and shoulder. 

He remained there for an untold amount of time, just holding her and letting her hold him, breathing in the heady scent of her and enjoying the feel of her body pressed so tightly to his. He felt _connected_ and whole in a way that he hadn’t since long before the island. 

Finally, after his breathing evened out, Oliver moved off of her. But he pulled her with him, so that she was cradled back against the hard line of his body. She pressed some kisses to his arm before laying her head on the pillow next to his with a sigh. 

“Goodnight, Felicity,” he murmured, pressing a kiss to her ear as he felt drowsiness begin to crowd in on him. 

“‘Night, Oliver,” she replied sleepily. 

He drifted off, finally holding everything he wanted tightly in his arms. 

***

Felicity woke feeling warm and secure in a way she’d never felt before, not as long as she could remember. She blinked her eyes open, wondering at the change, when she realized she had arms around her, holding her tight. 

_Oliver_. 

He’d stayed with her. Not just that, but he’d utterly rocked her world last night. And before either of those things, he’d laid his heart out for her, finally telling her how he felt. Even now, her eyes pricked with tears as she remembered the words he’d said, the apologies and professions… 

Hearing him tell her he loved her would forever be marked on her heart. Felicity never thought she’d get to experience that, to know that the man she’d fallen desperately for felt the same way for her. It was enormous and humbling and simply _perfect_. 

Or, at least, it was until she realized she’d never said the words back.Her brain had been shouting at her for weeks (months, even) that she’d fallen in love with Oliver, that her heart was too far gone to turn back. But somehow, when he’d said those words to her, she’d neglected to say them back. 

That… that just wouldn’t _do_. 

Felicity wriggled in Oliver’s embrace, turning herself until she faced him. He was still asleep, looking utterly peaceful and relaxed and her heart twisted at the beautiful sight. This man did so much for the people of this city; he deserved to have moments like these. He deserved all the moments where he could feel at peace and content. She hoped she could help him achieve that in the months ahead. 

“Oliver,” she said softly. 

He made a soft grunting noise and tightened his hold on her, but did not wake. 

She dipped her head, pressing a kiss to his chest. She nudged his jaw, pressing a kiss there too as she tilted her head up. “Oliver,” she tried again, a little louder. 

He hummed. 

“Wake up, sleeping beauty,” she coaxed him in a sing-song voice. 

“‘M not a princess,” he muttered, slurring his speech. 

“I have something to tell you…”

He cracked an eye open, regarding her. His lips ticked up in a smile. “Yeah?”

“Mmhmm,” she hummed, grinning at him. 

She watched as he blinked his eyes open, waking himself up. He moved back a little so he could see her better, but kept his arms around her. As she was about to speak, he ducked his head towards her and kissed her softly. Felicity melted into the kiss, deciding that _this_ , this right here, was the best way to wake up. 

He drew back and the affectionate twinkle in his eyes as he looked at her made her heart stumble. “Okay, what was it that’s on your mind.”

“I forgot something last night,” she told him. 

“Oh?”

“Yeah.” She ran her hands over the smooth, hard planes of his chest. “You told me a lot of wonderful things last night, things I needed to hear so badly. And I was so overwhelmed with it all that I didn’t realize I forgot to tell _you_ something too.”

“What is it?” He looked mildly nervous, which only made him cuter to her. How could he be nervous with her after last night? 

“I love you,” she told him simply. 

The look that washed over his face was priceless and she berated herself silently again for not saying it the night before. He looked like he was watching the sun rise, or a star being born in space. “Felicity…”

“I mean it, Oliver. I’ve been falling for you for a long time now. I tried to hide from it every bit as much as you did, but I’m done doing that. I love you and I want to be with you.”

His lips crashed down on hers, swallowing whatever she was going to say next. All thought flew out of her head at the feel of this man surrounding her with his own love and passion. She kissed him back with all she had, pouring all her love into the effort, tangling her tongue with his, moaning into his mouth and letting her gasps be swallowed by him. He moved over her and she rolled onto her back, allowing him to dominate the kiss. 

After a few moments, he began to gentle the kiss, finally drawing back with a few small pecks at her lips. He rolled back over but pulled her with him, hugging her tightly. He buried his face in her shoulder, his scruff scratching at her skin there in the most delicious way. 

“I love you so much,” he whispered into her skin. 

“I love you, too,” she replied, cradling the back of his head. Her heart positively sang out loud at being able to finally say this to him, to be like this with him. She never wanted to let this go. 

“So who’s going to tell Dig?” he asked. He pulled back, a grin on his face. 

“Oh, god. Uhm, you can,” she offered. 

“Why me? He can hit me, he won’t hit you.”

“Because he’s like my _brother_ and I don’t want him looking at me like that…I mean, I already had to tell him about what happened at the cabin and I do _not_ want to repeat that moment, holy frack.”

“I’m pretty sure he’ll be fine with it,” Oliver said. 

“How can you be sure?” 

“He told me I was being a dumbass, basically. And that I better not hurt you.Tommy told me the same thing, actually.”

“Speaking of Tommy,” Felicity began, trailing off a bit as she bit her lip. She recalled the kiss they’d shared, back before Russia. 

Oliver’s eyebrow lifted. “What about him?”

“I kissed him,” she blurted. Oliver’s eyes widened. 

“What? When??” 

Felicity felt a pang of regret at even bringing this up. “Before Russia. It was nothing. I don’t even know why I told you, I just… I don’t want to ever lie to you or keep things from you. Tommy knows how I feel about you. He’s fine with it. I promise.”

Oliver looked unsettled. “So, you kissed him or he kissed _you_?”

“Oliver…”

“I’m just curious!”

She bit back a grin at the flummoxed look on his face. It was really rather adorable. “Are you jealous?”

“No!” he retorted instantly. Then, he caught her eye and ducked his head bashfully. “Okay, maybe a little. You said it was nothing?”

She leaned up and pressed a quick kiss to his pouting lips. “Yes. I promise.”

“Good,” he said, settling a little. “I suppose Tommy escapes my wrath, just this once.”He was teasing, she could tell, and she found it rather delightful that he could even joke about it, especially given his and Tommy’s history. 

“Well, neither of us is going to escape Dig’s workplace lecture,” she predicted. 

“I can hear it now. ‘No sex in the foundry!’”

“He’s no fun.”

“Maybe we can keep it a secret,” he suggested. “Just to see how long it takes him to notice.”

Felicity raised her eyebrows. “That sounds intriguing. Care to make it interesting?”

“How so?” 

“Hmm. We place bets on how long it takes. Like… if you win, then you have to take me out to dinner at Table Salt.”

Oliver grinned, that beautiful smile of his that she doubted she’d ever get tired of seeing. “Okay. And if I win, then you have to come have dinner at the Queen mansion and meet my mother.”

Felicity’s eyes went wide and her stomach plummeted. “Seriously?”

“Seriously.”He kissed the tip of her nose. 

“Okay, then I better put some good thought into this,” she said, biting her lip. 

“You realize you’re going to have to meet my mother eventually, right?” he asked. “She’s home now and she’ll be back at QC soon, too.”

Felicity pushed down the small flare of panic, reminding herself how much she loved this man she’d be willing to endure _anything_ for him… even Moira Queen. “Stop distracting me,” she chastised. “Okay, I say he notices in one day.”

“Fine. I say he notices in one hour.”

Her eyes were wide on his and he shrugged easily, smiling at her. “I’ve never been very good at hiding how I feel about you. From you, maybe, but never from anyone else. He’s had my number since day one.”

Felicity melted a little bit at that, even in the face of having to have dinner with Oliver’s mother (eventually). She kissed him sweetly, hoping to entice him back to more delightful pursuits. 

And, what do you know, it worked like a charm. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am still considering a sequel. I often think about it, like I did with Love Like Battleships, but that fic was relatively poorly received and I wasn't sure there was interest in a sequel considering there wasn't much interest in the story itself. I think there *might* be interest in a sequel for this one, enough to justify the time and effort spent writing one as opposed to a different sort of story altogether. I've got another month before NaNoWriMo to consider it. In the meantime, if I do write it, here is the summary: 
> 
> "When the team learns that Slade Wilson is alive and in town and that his vendetta against Oliver is also alive and well, everything in Oliver’s life is turned upside down. Is his fledgling relationship with Felicity strong enough to handle the fallout?"


End file.
